[This post is part of the White Girl series.]
Back around the year 1,000, Scandinavians, a mixed group of northern European sea warrior types, dominated the British Isles. They came to be known as ‘Vikings’ or water raiders. The group was led by fierce and proud red-haired white women. And they were easily bored – hence all the raiding and pillaging, and don’t forget the raping! Remember that there were no fashion magazines or online sex quizzes at the time, and you can only paint your face with woad or alter your war-bustier to achieve more cleavage so much before you run out of things to do. It was time to explore. One day, the women decided on an ambitious sea-faring mission beyond the British Isles. But it was dangerous, so they decided to send a group of their most useless males to explore and report back, and hopefully to bring back riches that women around the world, but especially white women, can’t seem to get enough of.
Useless and stupid as they were, the men managed to find the oh-so-fertile lands of Greenland and present-day Canadian Baffin Island and Newfoundland. But who the fuck wants to live there, right? We’re talking big rocks with very short growing seasons and few people to trade with or conquer. And let’s face it, you can only eat so much fish… So the lands went unestablished.
Fast-forward a few centuries. Mainland European women heard tell of the Vikings deeds and failures and they decided they could do things better. And never forget these were uppity white women – greedy, domineering, vicious, never satisfied with what they had. Spanish women were the most ambitious, probably due to their Mediterranean passion and hot tempers. It was the aggressive and war-mongering Queen Isabella – the Iron Queen – who kicked the whole thing off. She entrapped and manipulated a simple sailing goofball called Christopher Columbus, (who was most likely a woman in men’s clothing, given ‘his’ propensity for enslaving conquered populations – bitches be crazy and oppressive and slavery-loving, and all that). Chris and her crew of swashbuckling, scurvied women set sail and began their assault on the Americas, starting with the Bahamas and other Caribbean islands.
I’ve reconstructed** what Chrissy Columbus likely looked like irl beore she donned men’s clothes to blend in. Women through the ages have committed tons of crimes against humanity and then tried to blame them on men through a variety of means. One popular method has been to dress up like men and go nutso on the populations around them, kind of like how Americans go abroad and tell people they are Canadian and then proceed to act like douchebags…
**I’ve transified men before using one of my favourite stupid online tools from the Seventeen unleash-your-inner-whore virtual makeover. See my post: “When You Aren’t Born with Radar” to know what I get up to when I’m bored and feeling transfobic…
Other European countries joined in, and typical white lady greed took over. Not only could women take over a place and kill the men and rape the women, thus fulfilling their bloodlust and lust-lust, but they could also enslave these unbelievably amazing local societies of innocent noble savages. Everyone knows that aboriginal peoples are peace-loving, sexual-equality-achieving, and all around nature-symbiosis masters (except for cutting off the noses of adultering women, scalping their enemies, taking over territories of rival tribes, getting high/stoned regularly, etc., etc. – if they don’t document it themselves, it never happened!!! Thank you oral traditions!), so white lady invasion was an affront to to to… God, or at least the nature god of the natives, because Jesus’ dad clearly supported it all. Anyhow, white European ladies cut a swath through the Americas, importing first, very young, white male bodies for husband-slave-making and for rapey-prostitution-fun, and general labour. Then, they imported black male and female bodies (something the Arabs and Chinese had been already been doing for centuries, but it was still probably originally a white lady idea, because that’s how white chicks are, dontchaknow) for labour purposes. Settlements were established. Eventually, the cold, unfeeling white ladies of Britain won out. Passion makes for good riots and general mayhem, but cold and calculating dispassion typical of the British and especially British women gives the stamina and strategic objectivity that wins wars in the long run. This is why the French lost and why they still hold a grudge in Europe and in Canada. Less passionate than the Spanish or Italians, the French are still good at riots, fire-setting, hissy fits and other passionate outbursts. But they just can’t win against the icy British constitution when it comes down to it. C’est la vie!
So, anyhow, Thanksgiving was established in order to rub colonization in the faces of what was left of the aboriginal people – nothing to do with sharing the harvest with neighbours and being thankful for food and hoping not to die during the long winter. White women are petty and cruel as we all know.
As time went on, native peoples were pushed farther and farther off their lands, and countries were established. Women drew up constitutions to protect the rights of white women. We have famous quotes by America’s founding mothers, as an example.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all women are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
Strive to be the greatest woman in your country, and you may be disappointed. Strive to be the best and you may succeed: she may well win the race that runs by herself.
These founding mothers, as we now understand, wrote solely for themselves and other women in their image. To this day, they are the most protected citizens under the law. White lesbians tended to be the worst – narcissistic, cruel, and completely self-serving – and they have tended to rise high in the power structure, running Western countries and keeping concubines all over the world. [It has even been rumoured that they keep virile and ‘troublesome’ activist men on farms, harvesting their sperm…] While they allowed non-white women protection and the right to vote later in the 19th century following release from slavery, it took a long, long time for men to achieve suffrage. Today, white men are still the only group who don’t have civil rights protection under the American constitution and its amendments, and are even accused of and blamed for all the evils white women have wrought upon the world. They have been fighting long and hard. I suspect they’ll never achieve true freedom while they continue to accept the trappings of sex slavery under women and while they focus any activism on lifting up non-white women instead of themselves.
Other North and South American countries have suffered similarly under white-lady colonial rule. White lady corporations peddling white lady inventions have destroyed local economies, land and waterway integrity, and local food systems. Poverty is rampant throughout the southern hemisphere and has leaked out to other continents through globalization. Yup, white chicks are responsible for that with their evil empire and expansionist mentality.
In all places, men have fought amongst themselves. Men who have bothered to speak out for other oppressed men are immediately attacked for their perceived privilege. Perhaps they are married to a wealthy powerful white woman; they might be ‘too’ educated or ‘too’ successful or ‘too’ something and are thus patronizing less fortunate men and shouldn’t be allowed a voice at all. In reality, very few men achieve success on their own. Orbiting a woman, any woman, is the key to success and security. It is, in fact, a woman’s world, and any man who tries to point that out is accused of being a woman-hating andronazi and trying to scrotify society (enforcing empathy and merit-based equal rights and opportunities and attacking the natural and justifiable female right to use, abuse and kill men). Many argue, especially publicly on late night television, that Western society is already suffering and thus circling the drain due to scrotification.
Confused? Yeah, I know. That wasn’t real. I rewrote history. I created my own male and/or non-white fantasy. It is satire.
It is funny how people reinterpret and even rewrite history to suit political agendas these days. Europeans like to pile on the US for capitalizing off of slavery, when it was Europe that started the whole fucking thing. If we do acknowledge European evil, we focus on Britain, forgetting that Spain started the entire invasion of both North and South America, and many other countries (Portugal, France, the Netherlands, etc) played significant roles in colonization. And remember that men of all races and ethnicities have conquered and enslaved people all over the world throughout time. Only white Americans (and increasingly whites in other Western countries) are required to feel guilty for this, however. No one else ruminates over shit like this.
Also note how great liberals are at using their 20/20 hindsight to criticize white people of yore for not having modern knowledge and know-how. [But it is selective to race – not sex. Women still actively participate in their slavery, so their oppression is still more widespread and unacknowledged than any oppression on the planet and slavery traditions are still celebrated and enforced.] This is all part of the whole liberal completely racist ‘noble savage/white devil’ paradigm, where non-white people wear the do-no-evil halos that you might attribute to a mentally retarded person incapable of having insight or being wholly unable to learn complex notions or understand morality. At the same time, white people are supposed to be endowed with genius-like brain power that allows full knowledge of every fact on every topic in the world and they are thus exempted from deserving forgiveness for being average, ignorant humans making mistakes on planet earth. For example, Columbus is vilified for bringing disease to the native peoples of the Americas. [No one ever mentions the significant evidence that in return, the Europeans contracted syphillis from the native peoples and then brought it back to Europe and infected wives and prostitutes both.] Internationalism enables the transferrence of weird local diseases to new populations, and Columbus is not unique in the role he played, nor was it intentional. Remember that germ theory wasn’t known in the 15th century. Further, over the centuries, for example, horrendous diseases originating in China have killed millions around the world thanks to trade and globalization, including the bubonic plague (Black Death) that destroyed Europe, the Asian flu, the Spanish flu (which was Chinese, but identified in Spain), SARS, COVID-19 and way, way more. But non-white importers/exporters of disease are never called out.
[Note that I don’t now and will never stick up for men as a group or worship cock accomplishments or give cookies to men who approach some kind of humanity status (the whole ‘I’m so great because I have managed not to rape you’ thing that women fall over themselves to reward). I also don’t think any race or special group of men is any better or worse than any other. See They Are All the Worst.]
American liberals are taking things too far currently. Statues of Columbus are being removed in various places so as not to offend crybabies. Erasing history – whether it be banning books or removing statues or literally rewriting the textbooks that children study – never achieves anything, imo except an even higher level of ignorance. And if you erase, no one can talk about things. We see this in the lack of knowledge women have about their own history. Our history is seldom kept, never taught honestly, and is constantly erased by men, trans, racial groups, religious people, etc. But it is important to keep all history intact and accessible, even the unsavoury bits. You have to learn from past mistakes – not blame people who are still alive who have little to nothing to do with the past – but to remember for the purpose of becoming better. But if we are going to take down statues, then all statues of pretty much all men should be taken down across the country, including the overabundance of MLK statues. That guy was a misogynist, pro-rape, hypocritical family values/adulterer piece of shit, and it galls me that people hold him up as some kind of peaceful paragon of morality. And by the way, where are the statues of women?
It’s also interesting that women are always to blame for what men have done. It is easy to understand this. Men write the laws. Men are also more dangerous to attack, not just because they are more protected, but because they will fight back. Woman are naturally hated in this world by both men and women. Men hate women for being more… more everything than men are plus some, and reinforce this hate in all people through the systems they design and the general socialization process. Women are physically smaller and weaker, and are also less naturally violent and less likely to fight back. Further, they are not protected under the law, so they are likely to be punished if they fight back. So we attack women. The bonus is that you can attack women sexually in addition to all the other ways you might attack a man. And because of how rape is defined by men, only the woman will be held accountable (if she bothers to try to report at all). Currently, whites are hated more than any other group, and so white women bear the brunt of many attacks: by non-white men and women, by white men, and by fellow white women. The currently liberal agenda is laser focused on making white women pay for all ills in the world and denying them a voice to speak their truths about the violence they experience, especially at the hands of the non-white. And many loud white women are saying ‘okay, I deserve it, do your worst’. Saying otherwise gets you hurt worse and by more people.
A few points to be left with:
- facts are not racist
- criticizing other races or liberal race-warriors is not racist
- pussification is not a thing
- black men have more power than all women
- all women have a right to defend themselves and to speak their truths
- rights and privileges are two different animals
- everything an individual woman does has political implications, even if she is sick of politics or is not a political person
- if you want to solve any of the isms or phobias of the world, you need to attack the root of all problems: MISOGYNY
I’ve been hemming and hawing for days now over which of my select g-words to choose for the next post of the Alphabet Series. But it was settled for me this morning as I was walking down a relatively empty downtown street and noticed a series of posters serving as advertisements for a convenience store. Each poster featured a larger-than-life head and torso shot of an individual consuming one of those disgusting slushie (crushed ice and flavoured sugar water and various chemicals) drinks. Different ages and races, and males/females were represented. Gotta champion diversity, right? And here is what stood out for me. There was a single poster that had been mutilated, and it was the only poster featuring a young white girl. All the other posters were intact – no non-white females of any age were mutilated and no males of any race or age were touched.
There is something about posters that gives them a sort of dog-whistle-like ability – a silent beacon, if you will – to attract the less intelligent and more passive aggressive of society. And it isn’t anti-capitalism activists who heed the call – it is assholes and the stupid. For some reason, they see a poster and the drive to destroy kicks in. Is it funny? Is it a safer and more accessible outlet than hurting actual people? Who the hell knows. I’ve never felt the call to vandalize. But I do notice the results. No blind eye turned here! I notice poster content first, and then I look for the requisite mutilation and, most importantly, who the targets are. Here is what I’ve noticed over many years.
- Females are targeted for mutilation most of the time.
- Males are seldom targets – even the poor Oppressed Black Male TM is seldom mutilated. (Could it be that black male lives have mattered for a long, long time contrary to what the current cookie machine rewards us for thinking??? And are they (black men) themselves more often mutilating posters than being mutilated…? We’re not allowed to talk about this, so we’ll never know the answer.)
- White female poster characters are more likely to be mutilated than non-white females. [An aside: White females are also more likely to be sexualized/pornified in posters – and I’ve seen this in non-Western countries as well as Western. And the more capitalistic the place is, the worse the white female sexploitation there is. I’ve documented a sliver of the public portrayal of white females, including posterized females, in a few posts listed in my White Girl series.]
Now the big question here is whether girls are mutilated more than adult females… And so we get to the larger topic here.
G is for Girl.
Don’t worry, I’m not going to break out into song with Madonna’s “What It Feels Like for a Girl”. Super dumb song with super dumb lyrics – I mean, really, can you take seriously anything said by a straight (or whatever the fuck she is calling herself today), super-pornified, proud sex-pozzie that has capitalized immensely off of peddling sexy, sexy slutdom to impressionable young girls? From birth, for the last few decades, girls have been bombarded by a) mixed messages from adult women about womanhood, b) grooming for enthusiastic sexual servitude by adult women (see this post here as one small example if you don’t believe me, and be prepared to be creeped out and saddened), and c) evidence of the complete inability of adult women to understand the actual and more serious root (aka male domination) of whatever minor oppression they complain about when not actively engaged in sucking a dick. And to make things much worse, these influential, ignorant and mindfucking adult women are, first and foremost, the very mothers of these little girls. Confusion or what! This is what it feels like for a girl – at least in Western cultures. No wonder there are so many fucking identity and confidence problems here. We’re all supposed to grow up to be honourable, sexual, innocent, slutty, compassionate, fierce, subservient, empowered, sexy bitches (don’t forget the bitches!!!) What an incongruent mix of incomprehensible, archetypal bullshit! Welcome to being a girl in the Wild West.
Anyhow, before I dive in in a more organized way, I’ll just say that I considered other g-words for this post, including: G is for gaslighting (one of the most important tools in a narcissist’s toolbox, and something ALL females experience), g-spot (it’s not the 1990’s anymore, so we don’t need to talk it about ever again, right?), gang rape, grief, gynocentrism (considered a form of feminism – and guess what? much criticized! It will be treated in a future article on the feminisms and pills), god/goddess (why is replacing an imaginary male with an imaginary female an improvement, btw??? Please join reality, ladies. Please.), and grooming (which I’ll talk about in this post). And of course, the g-word that I wish I could garrote, then swing at with a machete and then hack at with an axe, and then finally shoot in the face 10,000 times just to make sure it’s dead: <<< G is for Gender >>> Some might have thought I’d choose that one to focus on – it is extraordinarily relevant to female slavery, after all. But I’ve commented on it a lot in many past posts, especially those dealing with the fucking trannies. All that needs to be said is this: gender is a social construct designed to force females into the inferiority box and keep males running the show, violently with impunity; biological sex is an immutable fact and there are only two of them (sexes) contrary to the delusions of the psychotic (trannies) and liberal child-abusers. These are non-negotiable terms with long-established real meanings. And trying to reverse their meanings (which has been hugely successful – evidence that trannyism is an anti-woman movement) just smacks of a complete lack of intelligence and is embarrassingly and unacceptably anti-science in this day and age. Anyhow, today, G is for Girl.
I’m going to be very careful here not to delve too deeply into mothers and motherhood or the process of brainwashing / grooming because the former is going to be my M-word in this series, and the latter is going to be the subject of an upcoming separate series and, to me, a fascinating subject. But I’ll touch on them because they are both crucial in completely breaking down and then reconstructing girls into the scary robot-monsters that 99% of adult women are today. As a disclaimer, I am a partially blackpilled feminist-type, and while I do believe males and females are born with different stuff that makes it easier for one to violently dominate and get away with his behaviour and the other to be dominated and to accept her fate relatively unchallenged, I also believe that sociological and psychological processes play a significant role in making sure things don’t change on a systematic level. They are interdependent. But unlike adherents of either camp, I believe that women can escape aspects of their biology and ALL of their socialization. You seldom see it happen because it will be an uphill battle with NO support, but it is possible.
Okay, let’s dive in. Keep in mind that I am writing from a Canadian perspective, so in your part of the world, you may see differences. But the thing that is similar for girls around the world is that they are less than boys EVERYWHERE, and will be brainwashed to remain and accept being less in preparation for adulthood.
Let’s Get Real, So-Called Activists
There is no segment of the population anywhere in the world more vulnerable, abused, neglected, unprotected, and un-advocated for than girls. And by girls, (fuck, I shouldn’t have to define this… but I realize science or logic or critical thinking aren’t cool or hip these days…) I mean XX-chromosomed (aka ‘female’) humans under the age of 18. Not ‘sissy boys’ who like sporting nail polish and trying on their mother’s clothes. Not grown-ass men with mental health and sexual perversion and violence problems. Not even females 18 or over. I don’t care about people’s self-developed or enforced identities that contradict biological facts. Thinking you are a donkey doesn’t turn you into a donkey (although, you may make a credible ass…), if you catch my drift.
Born to Submit and Whore
Girls have things stacked against them even before they are born. If you think about sex-selective abortion (and note here that I am not lamenting that abortion occurs – I am an anti-natalist – I have a problem with the incomprehensible belief that males have more value than females… I guess if you like weapons…), a female is more likely to be scraped or sucked out than a male. If you look at Wikipedia, they say it is “most common where male children are valued over female children”. I laughed for a bit – clearly written by a male or cock proxy. There is no place on earth where male children aren’t valued over female children. So let’s reword Scrotalpedia’s error: “most common where either a one-child policy exists or where the resources available to maintain familial dependents are severely limited”. Because let’s face it – if any ‘advanced’ or ‘rich’ country suddenly had a one-child policy forced upon it, guess what would happen??? Exactly. Female fetus abortion and female infanticide would suddenly be a thing.
The sexualization and genderization of females also begins before birth. First off, no matter how open-minded parents think they are, I guarantee you that almost all parents have expectations that their girl-child will grow up to be a nice little heterosexual breeding machine. She’ll go to school, meet a boy, get married, maybe have a job that doesn’t upstage the husband, and will have baybees. Most parents will have no problem with the idea that their daughter’s career will be put aside, maybe permanently. She’ll also take care of her parents when they get old. There will be some variations on the theme depending on where the girl grows up, whether religion is present in the house, and how traditional the family is. But no matter how free-thinking, no parents envision a life for their daughter separate from males, and they certainly don’t wish for lesbianism or a child-free life.
Parents who know they are having a girl child will often decorate baby rooms with cutesy shit and pink everything (or whatever colour that represents femininity and softness and sweetness in their culture), and fantasize about all the little dresses and bullshit they’ll put their sweet girl in. After birth, all people will say is how ‘beautiful’ the girl baby is (hey, guess what? All baybees, male and female, look pretty much the same for the first couple of years, y’all – guess why they colour-code the clothing… so they can tell which ones are girls and treat them accordingly – as a future fuckhole) and will start planning her cutesy girl life with a focus on fashion and appropriate (feminine) extracurricular activities. All the toys will involve dolls and fashion and maybe cooking/cleaning/care-taking activities, regardless of what natural proclivities or talents the young girl shows. A few parents might consider ‘gender neutral’ toys, but by and large, there is still always a massive amount of unconscious parental grooming and socializing of the girl. She also almost always has heterosexual parents who model male domination styles, even if they don’t think they are doing so. There is no such thing as an ‘equal’ heterosexual partnership, so the messaging that is sent to girl children in a thousand and one ways is that mother does X and father does Y, with X always being the shit end of the stick. As I’ve said before, I plan to talk about hetero-female brainwashing in a separate series, so I won’t get into all the psychological mindfuckery parents inflict upon their daughters here. Suffice it to say that almost all parents successfully prepare their daughters to be future, unquestioning, pliant victims of men and male-dominated society. And the sad thing is that under the child-ownership, family unit model of raising children, many girls grow up with emotional, psychological, physical, and sexual abuse (much more prevalent for girls than boys) and no way of either reporting it or escaping it.
School, Teachers, and Other People’s Monsters
Parents get a good start on destroying their girls, but then the latter have to enter society in the form of school. And it is here where even girls with a relatively good start, family-wise, really get broken down. At the age of 12, in Canada, only a third of girls say they have self-confidence, and suicide is the third most common cause of death. By the age of 15-16, the percentage of self-confident girls drops to 14%, and suicide is the second leading cause of death. School-aged girls in Canada are 3 times as likely to be medicated for depression and related issues than boys, are hospitalized more than boys for ‘mental health reasons’, are self-harming in unseen-before numbers, and are twice as likely as boys to be cyberbullied. Sexual assaults of girls are common, but the numbers are hard to get a grasp on. Girls are NOT taught about sexual assault or harassment either at home or at school as a rule. They are also not believed if they are brave enough to report inappropriate behaviours or full on assaults. Girls are frequently punished for fighting back against boys who attack them, especially if they best the predator in question, and especially if a boy-mom gets involved in what will end up being a career of defending her son’s future rape and assault charges. And the social repercussions of reporting can be devastating as females are almost always blamed for what boys and men do to them. I strongly suspect that as trannies are more embraced in schools and trannyism becomes part of the liberal educational curriculum, sexual assaults of girls will skyrocket. The interesting thing is that despite the constant violence and intimidation of girls, they still do better academically than boys. I am a long-time educator in multiple countries, and I’ve written about male student inadequacy before. The thing that bites here is that despite girls’ clear superiority, their childhood brainwashing, the continuous violence and intimidation they experience in school, and the universal societal hatred of females that manifests on every level of the system ensures that female competence won’t pay off, females won’t fight it, and that incompetent males will always be undeservedly rewarded and supported by everyone.
Myself, I remember being beat up by a group of boys for the first time when I was 5, my first sexual assault by a boy occurred when I was 6, and then it is a blur of being punched in the stomach, being punched in the pudendum, punched in the tit, and countless other violations by boy students over the years. We are always told that when boys do these things, it means they like us. So we learn early on that being female and being loved are about suffering and violence. If you don’t accept it, there is something wrong with you and you are going to end up unwanted and alone. If you were abused at home as a girl, this is a massive threat, as love was always conditional upon you accepting the abuse there, too. And if you got ‘loved’ it was always accompanied by suffering.
I had at least two male pedophile teachers. My grade 6 teacher (I was 11) was very touchy with me and other girl students, and there were endless sexual comments, bra snapping, prejudice and more throughout years of public school. Not once did I ever say anything to anyone. Not about the male students. Not about the teachers. So how can we estimate the prevalence of breaking down of girl students through sex-specific violence and intimidation when even an above-average student won’t speak up? We know early on that we are in no way protected. Home isn’t always safe, school is seldom safe, and once you hit adulthood, you are fully groomed for large-scale systemic woman-hatred.
Oh, and as an aside, girls friendships don’t do much to help protect against systemic childhood misogyny. See my post on friendship for more on what girls can expect.
Girls and Pedophiles
Much, much more attention is paid to sexual abuse of boy children despite the fact that many, many more girls are sexually abused – and this is contrary to what boy-advocates would tell you (i.e., that girls get all the press). Why might this be? Well, my theory is pretty simple. Boys are not defined by their sexual attributes. Girls are only defined by their sexual attributes. Parents and societies do not build a boy’s identity on his sexual attractiveness. His success will never be dependent upon his physical attractiveness. He is allowed to be smart, and talented, and good at sports, and strong, and social, and a whole host of other things. Girls, from birth, are defined by how they look, and it increases as their bodies develop. By the early teen years, it is apparent (in Western culture) that a girl is three fuckholes and a pair of tits. And every girl knows it on some level. If she has an attractive face, all the better, but even a ‘butter-face’ (gross slang meaning that everything about a girl is attractive but her face) has some value as a fuck object only. So a girl is seen as little more than a sexual plaything for males. Boys are human. If we pay too much attention to assaults against girls, then boys will somehow lose. And besides, we have to keep grooming little girls for what they will be required to accept in teen dating and adulthood dating and marriage. If you get girls to accept sexual assault as normal, they will make the perfect heterosexual adult women.
Pedophiles: Most pedophiles, are of course, male. And of course, there is a movement (like there always is when male violence and depravity have a spotlight briefly shone on them) to try to prove that there is a larger than life female pedo population. I call bullshit. I have never once seen a female teacher speak or behave sexually inappropriately with a child (except on TV…), but I’ve witnessed and experienced tons of male pedo teachers do so. I’ve never, ever once met, overheard, or read anywhere a woman waxing on about sexy little boys (or even teenaged boys) they want to fuck, but I have heard and read it literally thousands and thousands and thousands of times by men talking about wanting to fuck/rape/mess up girls. And there is the presence of deliberate violence in a lot of men’s words. But this makes sense to me as I don’t see male sexuality as separate from their violence. Fucking women and girls is ultimately a violent act.
If you read the professional literature on pedos, we hear that roughly 1% of males are ‘true pedophiles’ (i.e., a ‘preference disorder’). But pedophilic fantasizing is present in 5% of males. I think that is very, very conservative, and the idea that fantasizing about raping little girls and teen girls doesn’t make you a pedophile is nonsense. Personally, I think if males knew for certain that they would never, ever, ever get caught, most would rape a child (mostly girls, but probably a few boys would figure in the mix too). I also think many would fuck an animal, and of course, most men already fuck inanimate objects on a regular basis. (I’ve written about male sexuality before.) Males are born wrong, become more wrong through the sociological system they construct and fight to keep, and no one does anything about it except lament that life isn’t fair. Hmm, this isn’t exactly an issue of ‘fairness’.
I also wrote a post in the past considering how many female ‘beauty’ rituals are just ways of keeping pedophilic male tendencies focused on adult females. Check that out if you wish.
Sex Trafficking: The only reason we have pornography and prostitution is because males exist. I firmly believe it wouldn’t exist if men/boys didn’t exist. If you are a het woman who is reading this and is yelling that this isn’t true at the screen, I would suggest that you have been well and fully brainwashed and need to deprogram yourself. Many women have managed to escape from the porn-watching loop that males have introduced them to, and all report being unable to believe they ever were able to watch it and pair it with love. Pornography, like prostitution, is dependent upon sex trafficking and forced drug addiction in females (so that they can make it through the pain, suffering and degradation, and then somehow stumble back for more). Most victims of the sex trade are female and almost all are forced into it as children (average age 12-14 years). They can be domestic and internationally enslaved girls. The former are very often runaways that end up in terrible situations that started out on the surface looking like protection. One might find it hard to imagine how a girl can be tricked into slavery, but it is quite common, especially when a girl is afraid, vulnerable, desperate because of poverty. There isn’t a parent on the planet who talks to their daughters about trafficking (remember, girls are taught to trust males, not suspect them like a feminazi would…), and many of the girls who end up in the sex trade were fleeing sexual and other abuse anyways. They are primed for male ‘protection’ (abuse).
(The Internet Watch Foundation works to protect child victims of pornography – they remove 1,000 pages of child porn from the internet each fucking week. And the porn never stops. Because of men. Never fear though – lady porn remains because women can ‘consent’ to their abuse, while children cannot. Fine line, imo.)
A Few Other Things To Think About
I want to close this long post, but before I do, I’ll mention a few other notes that are relevant to girls. First is infantalization and how it leaks into adulthood. I wrote a post on the topic here as a comment on how there is no true equivalent to ’emasculation’ for women because you can’t strip power from someone if they had no power to begin with. Women as a class don’t have power, so the closest you get is ‘infantalization’ – which is a way to prevent women from ever having power or feeling they deserve to have any power. The instilling of powerlessness in females starts very young. And this leaks into the next thing I want to mention: referring to adult females as ‘girls’. It is part of infantalization, and men don’t experience it. This is common in the West, but I’ve also noticed it as a common acceptable practice in places like China. Women refer to themselves as ‘girls’ and almost never as ‘women’. Woman refers not to a regular adult woman, but as a mature, matronly type – an older person, which no woman is supposed to want. Many young women even go so far as to call themselves ‘baby ladies’, which is this idealized, infantalized, but also desirable/sexy adult female. It is so bizarre and repulsive to me. But it is very common.
I also ran into the whole ‘girl’ thing when I was a young grad student in the US. I noticed a rather yucky poster one day on the wall in my department talking about girls and men, and I emailed the contact on the poster to ask them about the sexist language. I got a nasty, racist, elitist reply from a black woman, sorry – girl – who said the poster came from her black sorority that was, she was proud to tell me, filled with wealthy, prominent, black women. And this was the way they talked. So there. Well, fuck me. Rich, super-privileged black ‘girls’ promoting sexism, and expecting an economically disadvantaged, foreign-with-no-legal-rights, white female to support their leg-spreading cock-suckage. I love this world, and what constitutes oppression and who is promoting it and making sure it never dies… I don’t engage with racists or sexists as a rule, so I didn’t bother answering this woman. But my personal philosophy is to refer to adult women as women to give them the respect they deserve, instead of infantalizing them in the name of supporting male pedophilic tendencies.
Now, like I said earlier and have said many times before, I am an anti-natalist. For many reasons, actually. I have been since I was about 10 years of age. I once, as an early 20-something, had a dream that I was holding a swaddled child and realized that I was preparing a bowl of dog kibble for it, and when I looked down, I had a puppy in my arms. That is my idea of having a child. I’ve since expanded my worldview to include cats… Anyhow, I’m an anti-natalist. I have a massive amount of experience with children throughout most of my life – probably more than most mothers who turn their noses up at the child-free – and I would say with honesty that I’ve helped many. But I wouldn’t say I have a general love of them. They are exhausting. I dislike boy children immensely, and find myself looking at them wondering when they will start raping and creating problems for more than just their mothers and sisters. I am a bit mixed about girls. I feel protective of them, generally speaking. I know they have no advocates or protectors; their mothers are often their biggest betrayers and earliest destroyers. But many girls start showing their future brainwashed fembot monsters even in childhood, and although it isn’t their fault they are turning out that way, I cringe in revulsion at the child abuse that creates that sort of crafted persona. I don’t like tomboys much either. Yeah, really. I don’t like either end of the gender-spectrum, and tomboys and adult butches don’t solve anything for womanhood, in my opinion. But as long as they are not sexist or abusive to women, I don’t really care too much. They may not solve anything, but they generally are not the problem. I do, however, have a very soft spot for quiet, intelligent girls who defy forced gender streaming altogether – and are what I call ‘divergent’ (not to be confused with the definition from Veronica Roth’s book series, but the idea has some similarities). They aren’t masculine, they aren’t feminine, they are adaptable and versatile, and they are able to feel comfortable doing any number of activities regardless of for whom they are deemed more appropriate. It is also harder for them to find their community as they don’t fit into any kind of stereotyped box. These are my girls, and if I am lucky enough to find one, I’ll do anything to support and protect them.
Again, this is part of the Alphabet Series.
A few links with stats, etc.
Well eff me, it’s another post in the Alphabet Series. So many great f-words to choose from – some obvious picks, some, not so much. You mighta thought I’d have gone for the word ‘feminism’, and trust me, I am going to do a post on the various feminisms and ‘pills’ that are confusing the hell out of everyone – but not at this time. I do have an ongoing series exploring my Birth as a Feminist, if you’re interested in development and evolution in the ways of what males call ‘man-hating’.
F is also for ‘fuck’ and all its various offshoots – another obvious target and a point of usage and acceptance/disagreement in feminist circles, and I’m not talking about that today either. Same with F is for freedom! which I will address in another post as it is something I want to explore in depth – it is just one of those words that means something different to each person around the world, and is the subject of an annoying lie and source of propaganda churned out by Western countries in order to finger-wag at countries outwardly proud of their racism, sexism and dictatorships. As well, F is for the fight-flight-freeze-fawn set of reactions to threats; fantasy (check out my ongoing Year of the Fantasy series); feminine vs feminizing (an upcoming post); forgiveness (part of the Enabler toolbox and also addresed in a 2015 post here); and family (a fragile, but crucial, cornerstone of patriarchy and female oppression and isolation. Family will come up a little bit today as it is hard to talk about the actual topic without addressing family.
So, we’re going for something different, and on the surface, seemingly juvenile – well, it is, in the sense that it starts in childhood and shapes the trajectory of adult lives. But in reality, this topic is an extremely serious issue for women and girls, and one that is seldom talked about for a few very obvious reasons that I’ll get into.
F is for Friendship.
As ‘friend’ is one of those words that can be a bit of a catch-all in that it can mean everything and nothing at the same time, I’m going to attempt to define it first, with the aid of some categories that describe different functions of friendship. I’ll mention a few differences in how males and females see friendship. And then I’ll get into why friendship is the most important kind of relationship for women, despite not being treated as such, and why it just isn’t possible for women to achieve authentic friendship as long as male dominance and compulsory heterosexuality (they are inseparable, actually) go unquestioned. Finally, I’ll fantasize a little about what female friendship could be.
What is a Friend?
The concept of friendship has been around and written about for millennia, and I won’t delve into the history here because it is vast and has been written about extensively by researchers of human evolution, sociology, philosophy, psychology, and cross-cultural studies. In addition, I’m a little more concerned with the here and now as well as the meaning and mechanics of friendship for women, specifically. A lot of the writings focus on men and how fucking awesome they are (or how deprived they are, the poor dears), and often, tsk-tsky articles are written about female pettiness and bitchiness towards one another without examining why or how that may have come about.
So I’ll start with a simple definition and jump off from there. Briefly, friendship is supposed to be a bond of mutual affection or genial affiliation between two people on equal footing that exists separately from sexual or familial ties. Friends are supposed to enhance your life and provide benefits that you don’t typically expect to get from lovers or family. And it is in engaging in friendship that you are supposed to have the most choice in members and freedom to be oneself – compared to family and other forced or ‘necessary’ ties, that is.
For many people, even today, friends have ended up being neighbours and classmates and (for men for all of history; women only recently) colleagues at work, simply because they were convenient, necessary for survival, and may have had something in common, even if it was only living on the same street. However, as life has become more global, with more migration and travel, and of course with the onset of the digital age, many things have changed, including the possibilities for and definitions of friendship. Traditional childhood friends still exist, especially if one is a person who stays in the town they grew up in, but many people now have ‘friends’ who are random digital strangers who have connected with them through Facebook and ‘like’ their cat videos. There may, in fact, be no conversation, ever, and they will never meet in person, but they are called ‘friends’, nonetheless. Another modern development in friendship has come with the breakdown of the traditional family and with the gradual disconnect of parents from the lives and health of their children. Increasingly independent of their family, friendship has, for some people, become more important than family relationships, so much so that people may choose to spend holidays with friends rather than family.
There has been some hysteria over the last decade or two about a ‘loneliness epidemic’. Some of you may have seen one of those freaky documentaries about the Japanese and their widespread self-isolation and lack of social connections. You’re left with the impression that Japan is a country full of rape-cartoon-loving, capsule-apartment-dwelling people who pay strangers to eat meals with them because they have no friends. And then you’re wondering whether it’s going to spread around the world because porn is taking over, and more and more of our lives are lived online (especially in light of this never-ending pandemic bullshit). Never fear. First, documentaries, while I love them dearly, aren’t about normal people. How boring would that be, right? The Japanese are a social lot, well-travelled, and rather adventurous. Every country’s got their incels and their extreme social anxiety sufferers, though. Some live in basements, and others live in teeny-tiny apartments, depending on the culture and space available. If you look at the research (here’s an example), there is no actual evidence of widespread loneliness when you compare generations now, or the same age groups across time. One study, in fact, found that today’s teens report less loneliness than those in the past. That’s not to say that the quality of human connection hasn’t changed over time, but people are not really any more or less lonely than they used to be and the quelling of loneliness is one major function of friendship. I suspect the hysteria is just propaganda designed to a) shit on ‘rich’ countries, b) encourage traditional values and heterosexuality by falsely equating being alone with loneliness, and c) to try to prove that the digital world leads to fewer real friends. Let’s just say that this is a massive and complicated issue.
Types of Friendship
I’m a psych person by training, so I sighed and settled in with familiar discomfort in my search of how the ‘experts’ define types of friendship. Everyone needs to put their own stamp on things, so there is a ton of stuff all basically saying the same thing in different ways. I combed and combined what I found into roughly four accepted categories.
- Friendships of Utility: which exist between you and someone who is useful to you in some way
- Friendships of Pleasure: which are maintained between you and those whose company you enjoy
- Friendships of the Good: which are based on mutual respect and admiration
- Friendships of the Right: which are bonds based on shared values, morals, or ethics.
Now, that is what I saw, but I take issue with the first category. Friendships of utility are relationships, but I am loathe to call them ‘friendship’. There is no affection or geniality there, which is basic to the definition of friendship. I strongly suspect that this category was posited by males, because this is generally how all males see people and things. “How can I use that thing/person?” “How is that thing/person beneficial to me?” And if it has no use, it doesn’t exist. If it does exist on their radar, males usually want it destroyed. Basic male psychology. Follow that easy rule, and you will have a much, much simpler life with much less agony. Now, males also make use of category two, and if there is pleasure, there is always utility. This describes the whole ‘friends with benefits’ scheme that males cooked up and sold to women as modern female liberation. No commitment or investment from men, but they can use and take pleasure from women. Why buy the cow when you can have the milk for free?
Friendships of utility are also the most common connections that straight and breeder women have with other women. Once a woman is committed to a male and especially after she has popped out a kid, she only sees other women in terms of how they can help her or fit into her busy and crucial-to-society lifestyle. Even though she chose her situation, she still feels burdened and believes it is other women’s duty to pitch in for free or get together to listen to her endless complaints about her free choice for a privileged life, especially if these ‘friends’ are less burdened in her mind (e.g., lesbians, singles, child-free). It is extremely difficult to maintain friendships with women once they go off with a male and go into breeder-mode.
The third category of friendship doesn’t exist for men in relation to women. No male admires or respects women regardless of the line he uses publicly to appear like a Nice GuyTM. Don’t listen to the words, observe his actions, especially the ones that he assumes aren’t being noted. Likewise with the fourth category, which is a common ploy used by men to get women sexually, and is extremely common in activist and religious groups. Nothing gets an activist female doing free labour or spreading her legs like believing a male shares her world-saving agenda.
Also note that most women are incapable of seeing their ‘friendships’ with men accurately. The male will have a friendship of utility with a woman, while she is feeling respect and admiration for and possibly shared values with him. And she usually assumes it is mutual. It is not. Even with a friends-with-benefits situation, women will generally assume there is some kind of mutual respect going on, while it is actually completely one-directional. It is pure delusion, and eventually, the willingly ignorant woman encounters evidence to show her the truth. But she seldom accepts what is going on, however, choosing to remain used and often abused. Or she’ll assume it’s a one-off and move on to the next Machiavellian mister, who will respect her for sure, she assumes wrongly.
Hetero Pair-Bonding and Friendship?
How often have you heard a straight woman say “my husband/boyfriend is my best friend”, and did you manage not to laugh? This is a very, very recent development in hetero relationships. I strongly suspect that is is part of the velvet backlash against feminism and female economic freedom. For many years, ‘romance’ and ‘love’ were the hooks/promises/lies used to keep women marrying men, but most recently, friendship has been sold to women as a great reason to keep spreading their legs and diverting their newfound financial resources (still much less than men’s, but still enough to live on) into male consumption rather than actual female freedom. Of course, men make better friends for women than other women! How could you believe otherwise? Today’s male is emotional and sensitive and a great listener. Males and females are EQUAL now (a requirement for friendship). He does half, nay! more than half, of the household chores. He wishes he could be the one to become pregnant and put his career on hold and cut ties with his friends and lower his IQ by engaging in baby-talk most of his waking hours for numerous years. Now that is friendship! (I’ve never personally met one of these awesome friend-men, but hey…) But, of course, it is friends with benefits. So you still have to let him fuck you, and you have to do it. No male is going to stay with you if you say, “Hey friend, let’s stop having sex, ‘kay?”
So, it’s not really a friendship. Males and females, despite liberal protest, are NOT equal. It’s still a sex slavery relationship, but this time, you’re choosing to be a subordinate instead of having no options except public prostitution or suicide like throughout almost all of women’s history. And by the way, best friends are usually good for sharing secrets. For hetero women, that means having someone to bitch to about what your owner does to you that annoys you or hurts you, or how marriage isn’t what you expected it to be, or jeez, he really changed after we got hitched… Are these chicks seriously telling their hubbies that they’re sad they get one orgasm for every 50 that hubby gets and that porn makes them feel sub-human? I wonder to myself, in the absence of an actual friend to talk to, whether these women just live in more denial than a 1950’s housewife… As a long-time student of psychological warfare, I admire the husband-best-friend campaign as a smashing psychological success in maintaining female slavery despite the cage door having been sitting wide open for several decades now.
It is really hard to find modern research on friendship that doesn’t address sex, sexuality, romance, or dating. The more ‘free’ societies and people supposedly get (meaning distance from religion & magical thinking and the embracing of science, human rights, social justice, etc.), the more that fucking, sexuality, identity, and the objectification and abuse of women (and the justification of it!!!) seems to be a part of absolutely every aspect of daily life. Men have always polluted society with their sexual deviancy throughout time, but we are living in a time where it is in your face 24/7 and has been normalized. And friendship has not gone unaffected by this. Whereas in traditional societies and in the traditional past of Western societies, female intimacy was common and relatively unstigmatized, today in ‘free’ societies, women are afraid of friendly intimacy with other women for fear of appearing to be lesbian – the absolute worst thing you can be labelled as a woman anywhere in the world (possibly worse than being called a prostitute).
In traditional China, where I spent many years, it is very common for women to walk around holding hands. And it is not strange for same-sex (both male-only and female-only) friends to be very physical with one another. I remember tutoring a small group of 14-year-old boys at their home one time, and one of the boys was giving his friend a calf massage. [Hilariously, I was relating this information to a ‘trans man’ – aka a woman – I was forced to live with last year, and her comment was “that’s weird”. Yeah, women holding hands is weird, but a woman taking hormones and pretending she is a male isn’t weird at all… fucking spaz.] Traditional societies are homophobic as hell, but physical intimacy that doen’t involve genitals is not necessarily seen as sexual in same-sex situations. Likewise in the past in Western cultures, adult female friends could share a bed and cuddle one another and it wasn’t polluted with sexual accusations.
I suspect the stigma against non-sexual, friendly, female intimacy is part of the move to keep women serving men and having it ‘make sense’ as I mentioned above. Women today are supposed to focus on finding a single male friend who will eventually become a best friend and then a husband and sperm-donor. Becoming too close, especially affection-wise, with female friends is a strong indicator of lesbian tendencies, which is only cool if you still fuck men the majority of the time and bring the friends home for your male partner to take advantage of.
Let’s explore same-sex friendships more.
Male friendships have been celebrated and described in literature for millennia and in film since its beginnings. These bonds are rich and layered and they form a very important psychological part of male identity. Men are able to bond over so many things, and seem to be able to forgive one another anything (especially if they can bond over blaming a woman for whatever is wrong). Although I’ve never seen this myself – ever – it seems to be a commonly held belief that males can solve a disagreement by punching each other out and then moving on. I don’t know if that is true. Like I said, I’ve never once seen evidence of this. Males generally don’t compete with one another over that much, and when something goes wrong, there is always a convenient female to gang up on and blame.
But boys and men have always been allowed to have rich lives of freedom compared to females. Able to go anywhere they please with few threats to their safety. They are also given a lot of freedom and forgiveness as children, so they learn that to take and demand are their rights. They aren’t forced to deal with limited freedoms and resources, and are not forced to compete to survive or get attention, so friendship between males is, on average, much easier than that between females.
One of the most disappointing and angst-producing things in my life is my lack of quality female friendships. Coming from an abusive home with a domineering and severely mentally fucked up mother, and then eventually going no-contact with the entire narcissist-enabling family horde in very early adulthood, I’ve always taken friendship more seriously than most. But from an early age, it was hard to relate to other girls and to deal with the constant, bizarre betrayals. I am neither masculine nor feminine, so I didn’t automatically fit in to either the male or female camp. And as a victim of a narcissistic mother, I found myself in bad patterns with domineering girls and women over and over, until I figured out what was going on and learned to avoid these kinds of people. Once I got to grad school and had a gay community (before the trans popped into existence and destroyed everything lesbian), I was in heaven as no one was really what they were supposed to be and revelled in it. But childhood and the teen years were pure hell. I was always a bit of a community surfer – and have remained that way as I fit in less and less, especially in an increasingly lesbian- and reality- and woman-hating world. My friends tended to be other outcasts doing outcast things: math club girls, curling team, Junior Achievement, Reach for the Top team.
With age, experience, and growing feminist awareness, female friendship got even harder. I lost friends to marriage and children and traditional, small, stay-in-place lives. I moved around the world, lived a portable life, and realized how easy it was/is for males in my situation to make male friends in any culture. It’s harder for women no matter where they are in the world. While I can meet child-free women my age in Western countries (although most of them are still hetero, male apologists/enablers, and liberal morons), in a traditional culture, it is next to impossible to create a bond with women who are all married by 25 and who may be working outside the home, but even those jobs take second place to family duties. Friendships, if they have any, tend to be long-time ones and they certainly aren’t looking for new ones.
If you are a non-traditional woman and not a man-chaser, finding even partially like-minded women in the meat world is really, really difficult. I’ve learned to let go of any and all expectations of substantive friendship, and I focus on compartmentalized, shared interests. And I don’t seek to push the acquaintance beyond that interest. Female friendships just feel so fragile to me. And there are many reasons for this.
As I alluded to above, most females are forced into sensitivity mode from birth. We’re criticized, micromanaged, punished, and forced into adopting submissive and apologetic behaviours in order to get along in this world. It doesn’t work for all females; some just have the right combination of attributes to withstand brainwashing, and they end up stronger and freer as a result. But if you’ve ended up molded because of this brainwashing, you learn very quickly to be on guard. You’re never really safe. Criticism is a comment on your whole person, your value, your identity. The effects of this are even more pronounced if you have experienced narcissistic abuse as a child. So to be blunt and frank in a friendship is a risky business. You have been taught to accept male aggression and not to stand up to it, but at the same time, you expect other females to be like you. You have been groomed to keep the peace, and to withdraw if there is a hint of war. So what does that mean when you have a relationship between two sensitive people (i.e., two average females?) who are afraid of rocking the boat? You have a very fragile friendship. Misunderstanding is rife.
Add to that the competition for scarce resources and attention that males don’t experience, and you have a recipe for constant war between women over very little. It comes across as petty and bitchy, but it is the natural outcome of repeated punishment and grooming that all girls go through. Males just don’t experience the punishment and deprivation as a class that females do, so they don’t turn out the same way, and they certainly aren’t capable of understanding this kind of psychological slavery.
What ends up happening as girls get older is that there is always the natural draw to other females, but because of the hetero brainwashing, women and girls become ‘placeholders’ instead of real friends. ‘Friends’ are there until they are not needed (meaning a male comes along who needs servicing). It’s like putting the salt and pepper shakers away after eating a meal. You take them out when you need them, then you put them away and forget about them. And in the case of women, friends are there for emotional support, especially after the male master enacts his privilege upon his servant. Women also provide free labour, financial support, entertainment, and the like to their female friends. And when the male snaps his fingers, the friends are put away. Forgotten unti needed again.
Of the women who are born with the types of attributes that lead to resilience to brainwashing, and are fortunate enough not to be abused as children, things can go a few ways. Some become very devoted to women, especially if lesbian. If they are lucky, they can find a community, and friendships become more like those men experience. Frequently, though, many girls who are considered tomboyish as children get turned off by the nonsense that girls get herded into. They may tend to say things like “most of my friends are male”. This is a red flag for me. These are deeply misogynistic women. I mean, I get it. They didn’t fit in with the average female trained idiot and were probably frequently treated like shit by girls as a result. Why would you beg to be let into a club you don’t fit in with or are abused by for petty things? Males treat females like shit in different ways, but it is easier to navigate, and if you are a boyish female, the boys will treat you differently. Not equally, but they may not treat you blatantly like a cunt on legs like they do to more naturally feminine girls. The incorrect assumption these tomboys make is that males respect them as they do other males. Wrong. You may not end up getting raped like a feminine girl (or you might; you just don’t know what males will do), but you will never be one of the boys.
What Could Female Friendship Look Like?
It is possible for women to have high-quality, lasting, satisfying friendships. I believe it. Is it going to be common any time soon? Hell no. You need a certain set of conditions in order to allow women to have the qualities necessary to make friendship work. I’m mostly working on fantasy here, but I will say that I have one friend who is as close to ideal as is possible. I’ll describe what we have, and then I’ll talk about necessary conditions.
My closest friend is more than 20 years younger than me. We are from two very different cultures. We don’t agree on everything, and we each have life experience the other can’t relate to. We have had a couple of big arguments, and have recovered pretty easily. We have travelled together. We have helped each other out of a few pickles. She feels like what a sister should be like, but is nothing like what I had with the sister I grew up with. We have bonded over a few things: we both have horrific, NPD mothers and suffer similar shit as a result. We both enjoy reading and philosophy and travel and independence. We love animals and don’t want children. Neither of us is interested in men. We can talk about any topic and dig into it, argue about it, theorize, argue some more, and then come to some sort of conclusion (unless it is paused for continuation another day). We comfort each other and offer both serious and funny and sweet support. She is the best hugger I know, despite not coming from a hugging culture. And as of going on two years now, we live more than 10,000 km apart, which kills my soul and hurts my heart. Often. Luckily, we chat online a few times a week. Except for the geographical distance, this is what female friendship should be. It has nothing to do with sex, and everything to do with intimacy on multiple levels.
So what conditions do women need to foster this kind of incredible friendship? No heterosexuality, no demanding males in the picture. Preferably no kids. Compassion. Empathy. A firm grip on reality. No enabling behaviour – you should be able to be supporting and critical (meaning, able to point out stuff without being an asshole). Acceptance. You don’t have to agree on everything, and you should know and accept their imperfections. And BOTH people have to be this way. Equality is the key to friendship. Otherwise, you end up in some co-dependent shitfest.
Finally, and ideally, a female friendship is a combination of categories 2, 3 and 4 that I talked about above. Pleasure in another’s company, respect and admiration, and shared values. Utility is for tools, not friendship, and the only human tools are male 😉
See other posts in the Alphabet Series.
Welcome to post five of the Alphabet Series. So many great E’s to choose from. E is for excuses, egocentric (and a bunch of other ego-related words), emasculation (check out my Emasculating Shears. Oh, I’m just joking or it’s just fantasy or satire or art or free speech – don’t be so sensitive, boys… sheesh), education, equality, eggshells (as in ‘walking on’), etc. But I’ve chosen to take a little dive into a world so many women know well, both as a player of the role and as the victim of our E-word.
Hold on tight because E is for Enabler.
I’ll define it and a few other jargony words first, so we’re all on the same page – dang it if psychologists don’t love their effing jargon. Then, I’ll talk about the Cult of Positivity – my little moniker for those sunny, but vicious, defenders of the world as it looks through rose-coloured glasses. And finally, I’ll get into the machinations of enablers in two specific contexts a) male domination–female servitude (patriarchy), and b) Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
So let’s all think happy thoughts with the goodest of intentions and get on the train bound for the Land of Reality Denial!!!!!!
Enablers: What Are They and Where Did They Come From?
Compassion and empathy – concern for and an ability to understand the suffering of others – are good things. They are a uniquely human quality; marks of an advanced intellect; and of course, devalued because they are much more biologically common in females. Because of the way males are biologically wired for sadism and violence, compassion and empathy are quite rare to find in a pure form in them. So, in a world run on male violence and manipulation, these qualities end up being vulnerabilities, rather than strengths, highly exploitable and twisted and weaponized through patriarchal socialization. As a result, for women who are biologically wired for compassion and empathy, being raised in patriarchy means that these qualities are used to maintain the system through supporting the masters (males) and using them as weapons against their fellow oppressed (women and girls). If one knows how to manipulate the naturally compassionate as well as how to falsely play the victim, one can do an enormous amount of damage and keep a steady supply of real victims at the ready for one’s own personal use.
Very simply, an enabler is a person who supports or facilitates (aka ‘enables’) harmful behaviour in another person. The behaviour being supported can be self-harm or it can be harm towards other people. And the support can take a number of forms such as providing substances or tools used in the harmful behaviour or a whole range of psychological support that protects the abuser from taking responsibility or paying consequences for abuse. A lot of people immediately think of those in co-dependent relationships with substance abusers when they hear the word ‘enabler’. But these folks exist in all sorts of abusive relationship dynamics. Sometimes, enablers are completely unaware of what they’re doing as they’ve grown up with abusive and dysfunctional family members and are just living the patterns they’re used to over and over and over. But there are plenty of enablers who have more going on than a twisted version of empathy in the mix in addition to their history of abuse. Some of these folks have an idea of what they’re doing, couldn’t give a shit that they are doing harm, and may themselves be narcissists or psychopaths with their own host of enablers.
Co-dependent: Enabling is part of a co-dependent relationship, which is what you’ve got when one person is very needy and has a very weak sense of self-worth and identity. The co-dependent requires outside approval to feel loved or valued, is in poor touch with their emotions, has trouble making decisions, and is willing to completely subordinate themselves to a seemingly stronger (but in many ways, just as weak and damaged) persona in order to feel of any value or have a sense of purpose. These are people who’ve been emotionally abused as children and gravitate to relationships that are familiar abuse-wise. There is usually a sense that they are helping, even when they are facilitaing harm.
‘Flying Monkeys‘ – as much as I hate this stupid term, it is very commonly used when talking about narcissism (which I’ll get into later). I wanted to define it to differentiate between these folks and enablers, although it is possible to hold both roles in an abusive relationship. A flying monkey – a term that comes from The Wonderful Wizard of Oz – refers to people who do harm on behalf of an abuser, just as the flying monkeys did evil deeds on behalf of the Wicked Witch of the West in the book. These people are a sort of proxy or stand-in with their own sense of nasty power, while the enabler is a bit of a cum rag wiping up after the abuser. Now, like I said, a person can act as both an enabler and a flying monkey, both covering for/propping up and dishing out shit on behalf of their overseer. It really depends on personality (disorders) and history.
The Cult of Positivity
Have you heard the term ‘toxic positivity’ before? Well, don’t worry if you haven’t; I can guarantee you that you have met at least – at LEAST – one member of the Cult, and likely, if you tried to have a real conversation with them, the encounter left you wanting to punch them in the throat.
These are the folks who wax on about forgiveness and bliss and gratitude and cultural sensitivity and everyone having good in them and sending positive thoughts out into the universe and why can’t we all just get along???!!! They also have a whole fuckload of annoying platitudes that they trot out when you attempt to talk about REALITY that say nothing, but are designed to shame you, guilt you, and shut you up. It is impossible to have a real conversation with these people, and if you have bothered trying, at some point early on, they are going to call you ‘negative’ or ‘toxic’ or make some passive aggressive, superior comment about it being really difficult for them to be around negative thinking (meaning you and your cloud of doom). Note that talking about reality and problems are not negative thinking – they are essential to raising awareness and developing strategy for solving problems. Let’s look at an example illustrating the difference between how different approaches sound:
Cult: If we just try hard enough and send out our positive intentions around the world, global warming will be like over! I’ll knit some owl arm bands for solidarity and start a prayer circle for polar bear luv on Facebook! What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger!!! Grrrrl power!
Realist: At our current global effort, the effects of global warming will take a greater and greater toll on both human and animal species. I do my part so I can sleep at night, but I don’t have much expectation that everyone will do what’s needed to make a difference.
Toxic, Negative Thinker: Humans were doomed before they even started. There is no point in even trying to solve global warming, so you may as well do whatever the fuck you want. Drive your SUV to go to the corner store ten times a day! Bring back aerosol hairspray cans! After you’re dead, are you really going to care?
Okay, that was fun, but what about enablers? Don’t worry, I didn’t forget. Well, you will find an army of these folks in the Cult. Enablers don’t like to face reality – it is very threatening to them. They have been taught from an early age that talking about problems or having a complaint will inspire anger and punishment in people who are supposed to love them unconditionally. They learned to keep the peace at home by keeping things light and happy and non-threatening. And for most, it persisted into adulthood. Pure avoidance and people (abuser) pleasing. As a result, they end up letting bad people get away with things and hurt actual victims by silencing them. They are weak people, but you still may want to hit them when they gaslight the fuck out of you when you try to talk about something bad that happened to you. Stay away from them. You exist on two different planes of reality, and they will always support an abuser over you, while telling you to forgive and give people a second chance and that so many other people have it worse than you.
Enablers and Patriarchy
I don’t have data on this, but I would strongly suspect that most enablers are women. Females are abused psychologically, physically, and sexually more as children, they are the ones groomed for subservience to males through heterosexual programming, and as mentioned earlier, they more often are born with the capacity for empathy. And all of this abuse, grooming, and exploitation and twisting of a good, but vulnerable, natural trait serves to give males a free pass for the disgusting shit they do to us. And it’s not just blindness to or acceptance of the shit, it is the excuse-making, the rationalizing, the forgiveness, the second (50th, 100th, millionth) chances given, the actual victim-blaming and prey-policing, and the whole range of enabling behaviours that are taught to young girls so that they have mastered male bolstering in time for marriage. Most women enable men. They are not all Cult members, but even the most skeptical, negative Nellies will give a male a free pass when he hurts women.
Now, if you consider yourself to be a Black Pill type, you’ll think that females are born to do this. I have to completely disagree. I’ve talked about this extensively – I see nature and nurture working together in complicated ways – and I don’t think people realize how ubiquitous pro-male programming is in the world. So let’s put it this way. If it were natural to enslave ourselves to men, men wouldn’t need to brutalize us, or punish us for rebelling or fighting back, or threaten us with rape. Remember that the natural needs no forcing. It just happens. And if you really look closely at what little girls are exposed to – the way they are pushed and taught and punished for natural behaviours that don’t serve the male agenda (over and over and over), you can see that there is nothing natural about the behaviour you see in adult women. They are as programmed as robots.
But you can get out of it. You can deprogram. You can stop enabling males. It is just really hard, and living in the world post-programming is freeing, but demoralizing, and really, really fucking isolating.
Enablers and Narcissistic Personality Disorder
If you grew up with an NPD parent or parents, I’m so sorry. Truly. I know what you have gone through, and how you feel now as an adult. Both of my parents were narcissists, different flavours. My mother was the chief NPD. Father was her enabler, a psychologist, and NPD himself. It was an absolute fucking nightmare, and it took years and years to figure out what I had gone through, and to name it, as both parents were abusive in different ways, and the psychologist-enabler-dad did a really good job of making me feel like I was the one with the problem. And when a ‘professional’ is telling you that you have a problem, should you doubt it? When you’re a kid and you don’t know anything except that you’re doubting your sense of self, your very identity and experience of reality? Well, I’m still working through it all decades later – not sure I’ll ever heal completely, but I know what’s what now, and let me say, I’m an expert on NPD and mindfuckery, and sadly, how to effectively destroy a child from the inside…
So yes, enablers can be male. They can make excuses for narcissists who are male or female. The husband-wife / father-mother tag team where the female is the narcissist is a common dynamic. I can’t remember how many times I heard from my father (moreso later in my teens and early adulthood) that my mother loved me, despite all evidence to the contrary, despite some of the completely fucked up shit she did to me. Parent enablers are sort of trying to keep the peace (at least they think they are), but are actually making things worse in the long-run by allowing abuse to continue for years and years and years. And those years are crucial in breaking down the identity that is supposed to be forming in a child. From the child’s point of view, the enabling parent’s key feature is under-protection. And when you are not protected as a child, you grow up never expecting to be safe or even knowing what it means to be safe.
You can also run into enablers of narcissists in your adult life, especially in the workplace, and although you can escape this more easily that you can in a family situation, it can make life difficult. If you have grown up in an NPD family, you have been groomed for this kind of abuse and will mostly likely find yourself in relationships of this sort without meaning to. It will be familiar to you, but still damaging. If you didn’t grow up with narcissistic abuse, you will be thrown for a loop and wondering what the hell is going on. How you deal with the narcissist will depend on a whole host of personality factors stemming from your biology coupled with how you learned to deal with problems growing up.
Some of the things enablers of narcissists will do (and all involve elements of gaslighting) include:
The enabler uses some excuse of victimhood to explain away abusive behaviour.
You’ll be pressured to forgive, negate your own victimhood, give second chances, etc. The narcissist doesn’t mean to abuse you or they can’t help it – they had a rough childhood, or have a lot of pressure at work. Result: You feel guilty and feel like you are the one picking on the abuser.
The enabler reinterprets the intention of the abusive event.
“They didn’t mean it.” or “I think you’re misinterpreting what happened.” Or some variation on this theme. This gaslights you or paints you as oversensitive or crazy or just plain wrong. Result: You question your experience of the abuse.
The enabler tells you that no one else has had the problem/abuse you are claiming to have.
It is clearly not true. The narcissist abuses many people – even the enabler themself. But the enabler isolates you and implies that perhaps it is you who has the problem. Result: you feel alone and unsupported, and start to question whether it really happened to you.
The enabler tells you that everything will get better soon.
Cult of Positivity anyone? This is a clear denial of reality. Abuse doesn’t have an end date, so the implication here is that there is no pattern of abuse, what happened is not serious, and that you are blowing things out of proportion. Result: you hesitate to speak out again because what you think is serious is being dismissed as temporary or a glitch or that you are too sensitive or paranoid. The temporary abuse of course, ends up going on and on and on.
The enabler tells you things aren’t so bad.
Immediately, the abuse is minimized, and this false sentiment may be coupled with another silencing statement that other people have it worse than you. They may even try to tell you how privileged you are. Result: you question your experience of the abuse as you haven’t been validated – clearly you must be oversensitive or seeing something that isn’t there.
The enabler tells you that you are making too much of a fuss.
There is nothing like complaining that someone is complaining to make them shut up. Sometimes, this is accompanied by a listing of the narcissist’s positive contributions (especially if you benefit from them) in order to excuse the behaviour in question and to invalidate your complaints. After all how can such an amazing person be so bad? Result: you feel guilty for complaining, and wonder if the narcissist can really be that bad if they are doing so much for you. Likely, you are some kind of princess used to getting your own way.
There is a ton more I could say here, but this is just a blog post to help you understand what you may have experienced and to validate your feelings of helplessness when you encounter people who minimize or negate your reality. Enablers can be just as dangerous as those they enable. Many of them don’t realize what they are doing due to their own personal trauma, but I’ve never been one to excuse bad behaviour because of a sad personal history. My advice is to avoid enablers if you can, as they will screw with your head and can’t have a frank conversation with you anyhow. And while some believe ignorance is bliss, it is ultimately healthier to live in reality. Wait til I get to talking about psychosomatics 😉
And so we are on to D of the Alphabet Series, and though my posts are usually helped along with a little bit of D is for Drinking, I’m doing this one stone cold sober. And I’m choosing a different D word. There are many delightful words to choose from. For example, D is for disease (we’ll get to that later), dick (and all the fun words you can make with it), deprogramming (another we’ll get to later), double standard, delusion, death penalty, doormat, death (a favourite topic TBD later), and more.
But no, I’m choosing one that, if I had a shit list for overused and obnoxious words from the year 2020, diversity would be on it and near the top. And at the rate things are going, it’ll be on my 2021 shit list as well. Oh, hell, who am I kidding – I DO have a word shit list. On my About This Site page that I wrote back in 2015 when I started this blog, and which I’ve been updating over the years as I find yet more people I have no desire to interact with. There, you’ll find a word/phrase shit list (under Reason Number 2 why I don’t allow comments on this site) made up of liberal / po-mo goober-speak. And my d-word has been on the list for a few years now.
D is for Diversity, sistahs!
Now, I don’t want to give the impression that I think diversity is a bad thing. Not at all. But like with most things, I embrace the natural, and abhor the forced. Natural diversity is an awesome thing, and I’ll spend a little time talking about that. Then I’ll get to the problematic shit. The forced and unnatural (intentional and unintentional) diversity. If you’ve read anything from my sexuality series, you’ll know I believe that the human male, in his need to control and destroy in the name of love, creativity, and curiosity (but which is really just arrogance, ignorance, selfishness, sadism and a quest for power at all cost), has ended up forcing a lot of unnatural situations. Diversity is only one of these situations.
So let’s get to it, and in the name of flowers and sunshine and happy stuff, let’s talk about the positives, first. Natural diversity.
During the second half of 2019, while I was embarking on the risky adventure of leaving employment in China for unemployment in not-China, I found myself enrolled in a community college Bachelor transfer program in the US. I’m not going to get into that whole bizarro experience in this post, but looking at it now, a year after the school thing fell apart due to the pandemic, I regret choosing the US over France (I’d narrowed my destinations down to those two places). But there were glimmers of excellence – there always are, even in the shittiest of circumstances. One of these glimmers was the fall semester I spent in an Ecology course. I’ll admit that I only took the class because I was forced to take electives – don’t get me started on one-size-fits-all models of education… – but luckily, the instructor was stellar and loved her subject area, and ecology, at least, was related to my major. It’s actually a subject everyone should study at the very least online and for free (I highly recommend Coursera for free courses in many different subject areas. And while there, do a quick search on ‘ecology’ to see what they have going on.)
One of the key concepts in ecology and related disciplines is biodiversity, which very basically, means variety of life (species). Biodiversity is the hallmark of a healthy ecosystem, meaning the greater the number and variety of species naturally cohabiting in a region, the healthier the area, ecologically speaking. Greater biodiversity equals better adaptation to threats (e.g., human fuckery, natural disasters, etc.) There are several well-known, and mostly poorly conserved, biodiversity hotspots around the world – I’ve pulled a map and legend from the World Wildlife Fund (I’ve enlarged it – and you can click it for the full size – so you can see it better – the WWF site won’t let you zoom in, so I won’t link it) that shows unique and/or rich biodiversity zones around the world.
The key thing to remember is that when we talk about biodiversity, we are talking about the natural. Things grow where conditions are optimal for their biology, and Nature has her way of keeping populations in check. The predator-prey / forager-food foodchain is one of these common systems of balance-keeping. Adaptation is another effective system – change to accommodate things happening in the environment, or die out. And these natural balancing mechanisms work extremely well with all but one species, and I’ll give you a billion imaginary dollars – golden feminist turds, if you prefer – if you can guess which one 😉 Which brings me to the less-pleasant-to-contemplate portion of this post.
Unnatural and Forced Diversity – Male Greed, Ignorance and Hubris
Before I launch into this, in light of my last statement, you might recall having heard (a few thousand times) from pro-evolution (and rape-apologist) males that everything they do – and note that they are always subtly referring to their long history of brutalizing and enslaving human females – is natural and all about adaptation and survival and making things ‘work’. Know that it’s all bullshit – except the single fact that it is natural/biological for human males to brutalize and destroy, but it has nothing to do with furthering the species or ‘surviving’. Torturing a woman doesn’t make you live longer… Nothing about how the human male functions is good for the world, the environment, any of the critters on the planet, or humans.
So, building on that, let’s say you have a beautifully functioning system. I’m talking about bio systems primarily, but you can apply this to any system you can imagine. Then you introduce human males into the system. In less time than it takes to say “hot mess of the scrotal variety”, you will find a massive dick-shaped wrench thrown into what was originally a well-oiled machine. And while some systems (biological ones, especially) will work things out over time if left alone, they NEVER get the chance to do so for two reasons. First, it is written into male DNA to mess with things, even if told not to in no uncertain terms. They fiddle, they diddle, they poke, they prod, they take, and they kill, and then they shrug it all off. And while utterly self-congratulatory about this fiddling, diddling, poking, prodding, taking and killing, they NEVER actually make things better. And second, males are always trying to deny their obsolescence – in other words, instead of making things better for the majority, they deliberately create problems so that they have something to fix or to ‘overcome’. If there are no problems to apply their maniliness to, then why the fuck do they exist? This is the question every single male on the planet wrestles with over the span of his useless life. And we all know what happens when males lack purpose and develop angst. They get really insecure and take it out on women in the worst way they can manage.
Let’s dig deeper and look at intentional and unintentional unnatural diversity next, and then we’ll finish by addressing forced diversity and its evil twin: inclusivity. I’ll also address forced lack of diversity or forced uniformity. This won’t be comprehensive, but I’ll provide examples to illustrate what I’m talking about.
1a) Unintentional, Unnatural Diversity
One of the best ways to illustrate this type of unnatural diversity is through the idea of invasive species, and despite not intending to cause problems, humans (most often men) are usually the reason it happens. Increased global travel over the centuries, and especially in the last century, has meant that travel vessels as well as import-export goods and shipping containers have been exposed to plants, sea creatures, insects, and animals in one place and then have moved on to another place. Plants, critters (and their offspring), and the various diseases and microorganisms that depend on these larger beings can ‘catch a ride’ and suddenly find themselves in a new ecosystem. Organisms that manage to survive the voyage and then find themselves undiscovered, released into the wild, AND without any natural predators to hunt them down can easily begin to take over the local flora and fauna. Ironically, an invasive species, while initially increasing biodiversity, technically, usually ends up causing a lack of diversity, and in some cases, serious ecosystem destruction.
On the human diversity side of things, I’d argue very strongly that lax border control and weak liberal politics in Western Europe leading to the massive influx of young, aggressive, but ‘oppressed’, Muslim males has ended up resulting in an invasive species situation. It has been mostly swept under the carpet, but there is a lot of violence against local (and visiting) white females perpetrated by these males, and enabled by the powers that be. I myself have been physically and sexually assaulted by Muslim males in every single European country I’ve been to and on every trip I’ve made to Europe since 1996. Belgium, Germany and France have been the worst. So to me, and other white females I’ve talked to, it is an apt analogy. When illegal and non-citizen males are given free reign to assault the local (or a targeted race of) women, the women have no power to fight back, and there is no one ‘predating on’ (exerting control over) the interlopers, you have the very definition of an invasive species. It may not have been intended, but the unnatural and unplanned diversity is highly problematic.
1b) Intentional, Unnatural Diversity
There are times when men deliberately introduce species into foreign environments to serve selfish human purposes or add ‘variety’ to local options, and the results are unpredictable, but usually a problem. Other times, a desirable species from another place is brought in for labour or human comfort as we see with many domesticated pets and farm animals. [It’s always funny to me how vegetarians and vegans will get angsty over industrialized farming and leather-wearing, but not over their personal pet ownership and their personal use of crucial antibiotics or medicines that have saved their lives, but exist because of animal testing… but anyhoo.] But there are often problems with deliberately introduced species catering to human selfishness. I’ll address food crops, and leave pets and domesticated animals for now. Let’s explore.
When human males started exploring the world hundreds of years ago, they began to bring back the exotic to their homelands. Foods, plants, animals… and they made their way into local taste and customs providing an unheard of variety of flavours and experiences. This is part of every culture. All cultures have things they use that originated elsewhere, but that may be ‘traditional’ after years of assimilation. A funny example from China – and I use China because I know more about their culture and their silliness than other foreign cultures, and also they get very superior and snobby when it comes to their culture. Food is an especially annoying area of snobbery. But did you know that the crucial ingredient to the important Szechuan (Sichuan) and Hunanese cuisines – the hot pepper – isn’t native to China? Indeed it is not. The Chinese have the Spanish and Portuguese of the 15th century to thank for introducing oral fire power, originally from the Americas, to their precious traditional food. Likewise with the corn (you can get corn-on-the-cob at McDonald’s in China!) and peanuts the Chinese are obsessed with.
It has been reasoned (by Russian plant thinkers) that the place with the greatest diversity in food crops indicates their origin (i.e., you’ll find more varieties of chili pepper in Central and South America than anywhere else because that is where they are originally from). Logically, as crops move to foreign lands, local peoples will select the varieties that taste and grow best, thus immediately increasing diversity in diet, while decreasing diversity in plant genetics over time. And today, all around the world, we are seeing much less crop diversity – even in places where plants are native! – due to human meddling in genetics, industrialized farming and the disappearing of local, small-scale farmers who traditionally planted very local varieties. This doesn’t bode well for the food system at all. And yes, if you trace this problem back to its roots, it is because of male dominance, female slavery, the resultant overpopulation problem and male expansionist tendencies for appropriating resources from other lands and increasing their power. It always comes down to something along those lines if you are willing to examine modern problems honestly and in depth.
Check out the food origin map. Click to enlarge.
2a) Forced Diversity (and Inclusion)
Ring-a-ding-ding! As you may have guessed, this sub-topic is the one I’m most interested in from a political standpoint. It stains the entire political landscape in the modern Western world, and it represents a world of illogic, unfairness, racism, sexism, doublethink, and censorship, all wrapped up in a faux moral superiority / virtue signalling shit sandwich. It is, in short, one of the major accomplishments of modern male supremacists dressed up as anti-racism warriors.
All across North America and possibly even extending into Western Europe, you’ll find signage with slogans telling the world how wonderful (forced) diversity and its nasty sibling, inclusivity are. But when you’re forcing something to happen that isn’t natural, it ends up being kinda fake and giving privileges to some while trampling the rights of others. I’m not talking here about making white males mad because they don’t get all the available promotions through nepotism anymore. White male supremacy is forced exclusivity, and thus unnatural. And I’m also not talking about making sure the sub-populations that are already present are represented in their communities. Organizations need to reflect the communities in which they operate – that is natural diversity and a matter of fairness. What I am referring to is deliberately hurting people for characteristics that they can’t change (race and sex), and forcing diversity where little to none may exist to begin with. Just as we don’t look down upon parts of the world where plant species aren’t as diverse, we should not do so with less naturally diverse human societies. And just as shipping a bunch of tropical plants to the tundra isn’t going to achieve anything, forcing human diversity has no objective value or purpose (i.e., political agendas don’t necessarily have much value or meaning).
The basic premises of liberal Western diversity measures are that:
a) All white people are evil and racist and should be blamed for everything wrong in a non-white’s life,
b) A city or region that is naturally predominantly white is doing something wrong; is somehow ‘preventing’ non-whites from living there; and is boring and ‘cultureless’; and of course, extremely evil,
c) Any group that is white MUST be injected with non-whites – otherwise, it is not ‘diverse’ and therefore, evil, and
d) Straight, bi or ‘queer’ are okay. Gay is NOT. If you have to be ‘gay’, then you must still fuck people of the opposite sex (even if you have to pretend they are the same sex), because not to do so is not inclusive. Besides what is ‘biological sex’ anyways? Biology is not a science, but rather, a state of mind. Yes, a feeling. And stating facts is discriminatory and anti-diversity. So male is female is male is… wait, what? Well, you know what I mean.
The forced diversity gang (and it is a gang) runs on all sorts of bizarre anti-science, anti-evidence, anti-logic, catchy sound bites that are designed to rally approval-seekers, and to prevent women (mostly white women) from talking about their oppression at the hands of non-whites, and preventing women (mostly lesbians and real feminists) from talking about having their rights as women taken away by men pretending to be women. I see the words diversity and inclusivity (a word meant to paint opponents as racist, anti-male, or anti-trans and to silence them) everywhere I go. On front lawns of private homes, on web sites, in store-front windows, and on public school billboards. It is creepy – like the communist propaganda posters you still see in China. You are likely familiar with some of the following:
Forced diversity means that women still aren’t getting ahead. Women are more than half the population everywhere, except where they are deliberately killed off by men and their handmaidens, and yet they aren’t included in this political push for diversity. They are still pushed aside so that males can take jobs, awards, and recognition. It is more important to change the natural composition of a local society for no logical reason other than racial guilt, than to ensure natural diversity is upheld (i.e, including women). [Hint: there is no guilt over misogyny since women will still fuck men regardless. No reparations necessary!] It means that white women pay the price economically, legally, and socially for what white men have done in the past, while the white men remain untouched and highly employable. Like I wrote in a past post, while looking at a PhD program at a university in a predominantly white region, I noticed that the department had no full-time female faculty, but they had plenty of imported non-white foreign males as well as the requisite white males. The university pats themselves on the back for upholding ‘diversity’, but if they truly embraced NATURAL diversity, almost half of that department should have been white females if they were to accurately reflect the environment in which they function. Forced diversity hurts women. Always. If you still can’t understand this, ask yourself how it would work if you went into Israel and forced them to import a pile of non-Jews and give them priority status in the job market. Or insert any country or region outside the liberal West where there is little diversity, and impose a diversity mandate on them. How do you think that would go these days?
2b) Forced Homogeneity/Uniformity (and Exclusion)
Let’s finish off with the opposite of forced diversity. You know the words ‘pest’ and ‘weed’? Well, these are relative terms. In reality, all species of plant and animal has an equal ‘right’ to go about its business on the planet, and all have a place and purpose, no matter how small. It is only when humans decide that they are more important than all other living things that different species are valued or devalued. Some problematic species are easily managed through hunting or trapping, as in large game that venture into urban areas and kill innocent children, livestock or house pets. Usually, the problem isn’t the wild species; it is the fact humans have taken its living space and it is hungry with limited access to food sources. Very quickly, species can become endangered if fear of them is high and if their bodies, parts or body coverings have value. But sometimes, species are hard to manage solely through these means. One brilliant idea, especially with small critters, evasive critters, or critters living in large areas is to introduce what humans consider to be a ‘natural’ predator. Usually, it isn’t local, and the idea is that it will serve the intended purpose – eliminating or just managing unwanted or ‘dangerous’ species – and then either just die once the food source is gone or just blend in and chill. But that seldom happens.Very quickly, the target pest can become endangered, and you may even find out exactly what important role they played in their ecosystem. You also may suddenly find that the introduced species (which has no local predator itself) becomes an invasive species.
On the solely human side of things, we’ve seen many examples of this throughout time in the form of racial, ethnic, and religious genocide. Men of all races have sought to eliminate other races and ethnicities. It isn’t new, and it certain wasn’t a white invention, despite what people are saying these days. But it was male. Very, very male. Personally, I don’t understand the drive to have everyone look like you. I don’t understand the obsession with skin colour, even though I don’t have the right skin colour, myself, and was ridiculed and humiliated relentlessly – including by non-whites – as a child. There is a very specific whiteness that is considered desirable, and that I suppose you see within other racial groups. It’s not just race, but ‘shade’ that matters to some people. It’s pretty stupid. These days, it is probably more of a problem in countries that are fairly mono-racial than it is in most Western countries. An example can be found in this interesting New Yorker article, which details how far the Chinese have gone to control the ‘pest’ population of non-Han Muslims in its massive and highly diverse western province of Xinjiang. The Han are sending droves of their own people into the very homes of local non-Han to monitor and re-educate them, not to say anything of the hundreds of camps where people are unlawfully being held, tortured, brainwashed, and made to do forced labour; and btw, there is no natural predator for the Han…
Natural diversity, good. Forced diversity, bad. Human meddling, fiddling, and diddling always backfire. I truly suspect that we wouldn’t see any of these issues if men didn’t exist. And if humans didn’t exist…? Well, check out this documentary: “Life After People” (stream for free here) to think about the idea that we wouldn’t be missed at all 😉
[Again, this is the fourth post in the Alphabet Series.]
So, I’ve been spending a little time over on Saidit talking with some truly interesting women from around the world. I like it. Different ages and cultures thinking about the same issues; I love it when a woman makes a comment that makes me think more deeply about something I’ve either not thought much about before or that helps me clarify my own position. You’re never too old or too experienced to develop… or change! There are some other women there too – they seem young, unfocused, and angry (justifiably so; I have zero problem with righteous anger) who are likely finally finding a place to voice their rage without being censored. But I like discussion of the calmer sort, if I’m up for interaction at all. Don’t get me wrong, I have rage, and I let her out for a stomp every once in a while, even though it’s blood she craves at times…
I’ve hung out on different forums at different times, very often as a lurker. I don’t often participate because what’s the point? Most places are run by men and heavily populated by men and their cockpuppets. You either get censored, ignored or attacked when you comment as a non-handmaiden. Pointless to waste your energy. But so far the saidit blackpill threads seem to be doing alright, if so far under-utilized. If you’re reading this and haven’t been over yet, give it a try. You might find a topic worth talking about. There are a few different, related threads. Just explore.
One thing you will find, however, no matter which forum you find yourself on, is that if there is a woman-only space or a woman-pertinent topic, males will come and jizz all over it. And no matter where they are from or what age they are, they are all exactly the same. It is a bit eerie actually, but as a result, they are completely predictable. I’m trying to figure out whether all males share a mind or whether they are all given a handbook at birth: “How to derail a discussion group of women in the most male way possible in 10 easy steps”. I’m going to ignore the Neanderthal infiltrator. He is the guy who just stomps in and announces that all women are bitches or that women have easier lives than men. And then he just waits for women to freak out (which they usually don’t because they’ve encountered this asshole a million times before). No, today, I’m focusing on the guy who saunters in and attempts a dialogue. There are a million of these guys too, but they are often a little more successful at derailing women. Here’s how it always goes:
- Male announces himself. “Greetings. I’m Obi-Wan Kenobi , but you can call me Humble Scrote. I’m just a simple, innocent male, and I wanted to ask a question to all you wise women. You can feel free to ignore me, but I would love it if you would educate me on X, Y, Z topic. I’m confused.” So, note a few things here: the male must announce himself – unlike any of the women in the group, even if they haven’t posted before. He usually tells everyone he is male and makes some self-deprecating comment to show women he doesn’t feel superior to them (ahem… that’s coming later). He also invites the women to completely ignore him, while at the same time plowing on with an endless paragraph that demands that they filter through the jizzy mess, unable to ignore him. In the humble paragraph, it is clear that despite what his actual words say, he does, in fact, expect the group to completely shift focus to him, and often the question(s) he has isn’t directly tied to the initial topic of the post.
- Reactions: Someone always reacts to the Nice Guy TM. There is at least one naïve and/or well-trained ‘nice’ woman who welcomes the penis to the group. He is being so sweet and humble, after all, so he can’t be one of ‘those guys’. (Not all men!) Women are expected to be nice and helpful, and most importantly, not to have boundaries. It is okay to interrupt women and demand their attention. Men don’t see this as being on the same spectrum as rape, unwanted touching, taking up more than one’s share of space on buses or shared seating, etc. But it is all part of the male dominance-female subservience system. Women don’t have boundaries. Men have the right to be everywhere. So you’ll get a nice welcoming woman, thrilled with the opportunity to help a male understand what women are about, who usually asks penis master to clarify something or to spell out his question, if he didn’t already do so upon flouncing into the e-space. You will also often get at least one awesome woman who will address the intruder by his real name, usually something like Scrote or Moid. Welcoming Woman is usually quicker on the draw, though, so by the time the Warrior Woman has responded, dick-for-brains has usually written at least 2-3 long paragraphs outlining his confusion or clarifying how fucking amazing he is (Not all men!).
- Then the scrote sees the unwelcoming comment, and he shows his real face. Holy shit! He isn’t a Nice Guy TM. Or rather, he is a Nice Guy, but the bitch who is biting his head off is making him respond like some rapey turd. How can you blame him? How else is he to respond to someone who is clearly a man-hating lesbian, and who likely has emasculating testicle shears hanging just inside the front door of her apartment? Is he supposed to just leave the forum? Hell no! He has every right to be in the women’s space derailing everyone from the interesting topic they were discussing and demanding all eyes turned to him as he spins in a testosterific cloud of confusion. Stop talking and just listen and learn by reading? Hell no! He has a right to voice his opinions and ask his questions! How dare these women attack him. He is suddenly a victim and he lashes out like all men know how to do (again, is it hivemind or is there a bloody handbook on this???) His initial response is usually along the lines of “What is your problem? / What did I do??? ” Totally eye-blinkingly innocent.
- Then it goes on. It becomes quickly apparent that the Scrotal Mess isn’t there to be educated. What he really wanted to do was to point out that feminists are misinterpreting the state of the world. Or most men aren’t what the actual data available publicly say they are. Or most men don’t hate women, and the men who do hate women don’t hate them 100%, maybe just like 25% or something (there is always a statistic in there somewhere). Or women have more power than men these days. Or, I mean pick something – it almost always has something to do with women being stupid or privileged in some way, and men are innocent victims suffering in this world because of mean feminists who are mean. Ruining everything! Waaaah!
- There may be some response from the ass-kicking forum defenders telling Sir-Masturbates-Alot to fuck off. The initially welcoming woman has usually kept out of things – she is probably confused. (Why are you attacking him…???) And the man then goes on to do at least one of the following: a) He deposits a man-turd in the form of a warning, e.g., “With this attitude, you will quickly find yourself with few allies.” “You’ll never make progress if you don’t include ME (and other Nice Feminist Guys) in your endeavours.” b) He reinforces his victim status, even though he was the one to penetrate the women, I mean the women’s discussion group. “Geez, bite my head off. I was just trying to learn/ask a simple (multi-paragraph) question.” or c) He’ll make threats and use hate speech. This is self-explanatory. We’ve all seen Nice Guys TM wish us dead or raped. They’ve all reported US for hate speech and tried to get us censored, often successfully. They’ve all called us cunts and bitches and feminazis and whores and TERFs and Karens and the list is endless.
- Scrote eventually fucks off. He is often banned if there is a moderator. But he may come back with a different user name. Sometimes it is hard to tell, they all sound the fucking same. And all women are left knowing that no matter where they are, whether it be online or in the meat world, they will always be attacked by men. Women are just not allowed to speak publicly without some fucking man policing the whole damned thing and thinking that his opinion is more important than women’s and that his demand for attention and service are vastly more urgent and important than the need for women to speak freely and without interference about the things that concern their lives most seriously.
And as a close, please note that I have lurked on blogs representing special interest groups, and you don’t see this level of infiltration and sense of entitlement by members that wouldn’t normally be included in that group. This seems only to apply to women as a class.
It is up to you to decide why all these guys sound the same. Are men born into a hivemind situation or are they handed a manual at birth that teaches them how to dominate women, including in e-forums? The only thing I know for certain is that it is just best not to respond to them. They hate it and will go away faster.
I’ve seen variations on the following theme increasingly on the internet and once or twice in person (it would be more if the pandemic didn’t limit outdoor interaction and if I were more socially inclined).
I’ve been back in the West for a little over a year-and-a-half, and things have gotten wildly out of control thanks to the liberally insane. I posted on my experience with BDM last year in California and the complete and utterly deafening silence of the Women’s History Month that followed Black History Month. I’m still left wondering whether it’s because a) we erase women’s history, so there is nothing to celebrate, or b) black males can’t accept that there are people more oppressed than they are, or c) trannies have completely taken over womanhood and won’t allow any kind of attention paid to XX because to do so would be to lit-er-al-ly murder them en masse. Probably all three. Regardless, censorship is alive and well in the West. And speaking of censorship, if I get electronically erased by posting this, you can still find me occasionally on Saidit BPF . I don’t allow comments here and thus don’t get a lot of traffic, so I am probably less of a threat than other writers, but you don’t know these days… Just always remember who actually has the power in this world (hint: it is not the people being systematically and swiftly censored – aka women who don’t support the liberal or conservative male agenda – they are the same thing, really). Language and who gets to control it is the ultimate show of power. Note that in the comic strip below, the character playing the ‘target’ (the white female) doesn’t represent anything I’ve ever seen in person or online (i.e., I’ve never seen a white woman stand up to a black male before and question his supremacy over her). The other characters, however, are depictions of what is actually going on. You have ALL witnessed it at least once. I shouldn’t need to spell that out, but if that were true, this post would have never crossed my mind. Just tired of the lies.
White females are not responsible for the sad state of the world, despite how liberals (and me in a fun post) have re-written history to make it appear. Wake the fuck up. Men need to take responsibility for what they have done and continue to do, and women really need to stop policing other women and supporting the oppressive male agenda, which includes group-specific censorship, and hate speech against women (and especially, white women).
This is a rant. I have a few of them in the queue, and I had planned on another topic for publication today, but things move quickly here in Canada. So if you’re in rant-reading mode, buckle up…
It was only a matter of time. I’ve been waiting for it, and frankly, given the living situation and how things are managed here, I’m surprised it hasn’t happened sooner. I came back to my windowless micro-room in the shithole in which I’ve been forced to live due to poverty in my shithole country (Canada) that punishes women for being ‘old’ (among many other things) only to find a note on my door informing me that we’ve been infiltrated by one of The Infected, but that the management will not be taking it seriously.
A little backtracking since you may not have read further back on this blog. I’ve been unemployed for more than a year-and-a-half now. Part of that was planned as I transitioned from a paying job in China back in July 2019 to a full-time studentship in the US, the idea being that I would use the time in the US to make connections and work my way into some employment. Everyone knows that getting jobs isn’t about your education, qualifications or competence, but about who you know and being in the right place at the right time. I’m 48 and this is how it has worked my entire fucking life. This is how men still dominate the job market despite their inferiority. Men help men, and sometimes the women they are fucking or want to fuck. If you are a woman on the outside (smart, gay, old, etc), things are very difficult, so you have to be good at networking.
Anyhoo, the pandemic hit, and suddenly I was stuck in the US with a shut-down educational program, an insanely expensive place to live and nowhere to go. Literally nowhere to go. I have no family, few Western friends who actually do more than say hello electronically and who certainly won’t help me in a time of need, and no home base in my home country of Canada. I hadn’t lived there in a decade. But finding a job in my former field (teaching ESL) in a foreign country was out of the question, so with more than half my small savings depleted, I repatriated to Canada with dread in my bones. And I was right to expect the worst. After being lied to by the Canadian government (they officially told me after a formal inquiry that they would pay for me to quarantine due to having no home to return to) and being forced to stay in an expensive hotel with no affordable food access for 2 weeks, I moved out to a city I had lived in about 20 years previously. I found a ‘cheap’ place to stay in an overpopulated house full of very strange people in the sticks via AirBnB for a few months, but had to flee due to an abusive male who threatened my life. And given that without a job, you can’t get an apartment, there was nowhere to go but a downtown hostel that does extended days (meaning month-by-month rentals), but functions more like a flophouse, centred as it is in the dangerous homeless- and drug-addict-ridden area of town, and strangely still accepting random travellers from all over the place despite COVID restrictions. I had stayed at this place in a 4-month extended stay 20 years previously when I first moved to the city for a job. It has gone downhill a bit, attracting a lot of really weird, listless and creepy men in addition to people who are flying in from hard-hit Virus areas of Canada as well as other countries. The worst thing about hostels, even in non-COVID times is that you always have to share kitchen and bathroom facilities – hotbeds of germs and disease even under normal circumstances. I know for a fact that the males who share the bathroom closest to my room don’t wash their hands and leave disgusting messes all the fucking time. This is well known through social research, but the more fucked up the population of men, the dirtier they are. And the cleanliness standards of this place are dubious to me. They don’t clean door knobs. The toilets aren’t cleaned properly, and the showers might get sort of cleaned once a week. Maybe. I had applied for a part-time cleaning job here, but wasn’t even given the time of day. Over the past few months, I’ve noticed the only ones getting the cleaning jobs are people under 30, and there is a whole parade of them, constantly changing staff. I know for a fact that I clean better than any of those fuckers. I’m a Gen-X’er who grew up in a time where children, especially girls, still had household chores starting at a young age. And as the eldest child with a completely useless mother and a mostly absentee father, I had girl jobs and boy jobs. I am a cleaning master. And I know I’m physically stronger than all of the females they employ in this joint. Further, I have more hostel experience than all of these young people put together spending most of my adult life working and moving around abroad as I have. But this is a sexist-ageist world. I can’t get hired for anything to save my life. If I were male, my age wouldn’t matter so much. But I suspect there is a connection thing going on – millennials make sure their friends get jobs.
So I get the notice of infection today, they detailed a few things about when the Infected arrived and what their activities were after arriving and when they left. The person was staying in the same area where my room is, which also means we shared a bathroom. The hostel has indicated that it is no big deal. The only thing they are going to change is that they are going to stop taking randos off the street for short stays – but it won’t be implemented until March 1st???!!! How is this helpful? We’re going to continue putting you at risk for another 3.5 weeks. Whatevs.
Now, this particular region where I am living is one of the least affected COVID areas of Canada in a province which has done much better than many of the other provinces (which I attribute to there being a female physican in charge of regulations here), and this is good considering it has a large population. We are on an island, which has helped to limit much of the traffic that would normally pass through a large city. So to have a case show up here speaks to what happens when you have poorly managed (aka ‘money grubbing takes primacy over public safety) congested housing with low-income people, especially males, who generally don’t give a shit how their actions affect other people. Our national media has only focused on the effects on poor immigrants, but there are tons of poor locals who are as affected by disease and poverty as idiots who come here illegally or who come expecting to find streets paved with gold and government hand-outs for people who haven’t contributed to the tax base (trust me, this is a common perception of Canada and why many, many foreigners come here). Poverty is rampant in Canada and it affects all races and citizenship status. But liberalism has its agenda…
I’m pretty sure I had COVID early on while in the US before anyone was taking things seriously, and I really don’t want to come down with the dangerous new strain that has made its way to Canada from the UK (we have one case of it already in my city thanks to our unfortunate ties to the British). I will say for certain that I think China did things correctly – not the withholding of information from the world part and failing to help the world in a significant way after infecting us – but their local policy implementation of locking everyone down and enforcing strict policies on comings and goings at the community level. They nipped it in the bud before COVID could destroy their economy. Chinese nationalists (according to my former students) are laughing at us Westerners with our fucking ‘freedom’ talk and our limp dick approach to letting people do whatever the fuck they want and thus spreading the disease everywhere and destroying many people’s economic lives (including my own!).
I’ll never be a communist (or a capitalist for that matter), but when I can finally get out of here, I won’t have any problem moving back to a country living under dictatorship. It’s not ideal, and the racist sexism is always there, like it is here, but at least I can be employed and any crises will be dealt with swiftly without entitled shitheads ruining it for everyone. I hate all male political systems, but after going through this pandemic business and coming face-to-face with the rabid anti-woman liberalism that is a worse infection than COVID ever could be, I’ll take the dictatorship, than you very much.
Read the first post in the series to get the backstory for what I’ve begun here. I’m going to attempt to get through the alphabet choosing words that are relevant to the feminism I practise. I promise, there will be plenty of posts to make you mad and make you think. Why else write…?
I’ll add new posts to this page as they are published.
Get ready for a fun topic. It is complex. It can be looked at from different angles. And it can affect women in a variety of ways all at the same time!
That’s right. C is for censorship, ladies, and you don’t have to have spent the better part of a decade living and working in a communist dictatorship like I did to have experienced a form of censorship personally.
I’m going to consider briefly what censorship means in the publicly accepted sense, and then I’ll discuss other forms of censorship that are especially relevant to women, but that are seldom considered to be censorship or are taken seriously for one reason or another.
First, what is censorship as is defined by the world who cares about such things?
The suppression or prohibition of any parts of books, films, news, etc. that are considered obscene, politically unacceptable, or a threat to security.
Okay, thank you scrotals of the Oxford dictionary. Let me just jump in and say this: censorship is about power and control no matter what kind of spin you put on it. All of the reasons men give for censorship are usually spun as some sort of protection, but seldom of those who truly need protection (women and children, mostly). If protection of actual vulnerable groups were the true goals of the censoring bodies, there are more effective and respectful ways of doing it. So, no. It is all about power and control and the only protection is of the ones who wield the power and control. And who are these controlling bodies? Most often, they have been governments and religious institutions, but increasingly today, they are companies/corporations (e.g., publishing groups, media outlets, social media giants), large organizations (e.g., the Boy Scouts, Planned Parenthood, Pride), schools (at any level), and even social groups (just look around you at the local level). The important thing to note is that censorship is dictated by men and often helped along by handmaidens of the patriarchy.
Protection can often be called ‘cultural sensitivity’, ‘public security’, ‘obscenity safeguards’ and the like and is worded in such a way to discourage opposition by blackening or questioning the morality of or implying paranoia or conspiracy theorist tendencies in anyone who suggests that the reasons are actually more about control than doing right. There are occasional instances where there is a legitimate attempt to protect the vulnerable or to quell legitimately violent groups through censorship, but as mentioned above, whether this is the correct way to ‘protect’ is up for debate. But the ethics and morality game can be highly personal for most people and the decision about who is allowed to speak and be heard often comes down to very biased decision-making.
So let’s talk a little about recognized censorship and then about other manifestations of censorship that happen, more often than not, to women.
1 Recognized Censorship
I’ll tell you from experience that it is a serious mindfuck living in a dictatorship as a person who didn’t grow up in one. If you have read anything by Kafka, anything by the various absurdist writers, ‘1984’, etc., then you have had glimpses into some of the situations you might find yourself encountering in communist or fascist countries. Lots of rules that don’t make sense, with a complementary and necessary underground system of ways to get around all the rules. Lots of contradictory nonsense and red tape that prohibits people from getting shit done or even bothering to pursue things. Lots of threats of consequences that aren’t quite articulated or clear, but that are universally understood to exist. Serious, multi-multi-level heirarchies and knowledge/skill silos such that you can never find the right person for your question or need, and no one seems to be able to solve a problem without 50 other people being involved. And constant non-answers or very circular-logic answers to very simple questions, especially ‘why’ questions. You have to learn to go with the flow, or you leave, or you stay and go mad. Those are the options as an outsider.
Dictatorships are very weak systems. This applies equally to political dictatorships as to small unofficial dictatorships like traditional hetero marriages. And no matter the size, all are dependent upon the absolute control of and power over all the lesser members by the dictator (or husband, in the case of marriage). Because the systems are so weak, the dictator needs dependent members to be voiceless, powerless, ignorant, subservient, and with limited freedoms. Dependent members are mired in mindfuckery and rules, require permission for basic things, and are limited in the information they can access and generate and how much they are allowed to communicate, and the scope of their communications. Many topics are off-limits, especially those that call into question the power of the dictator or make them lose face or even appear the slightest bit weak. And this censorship coupled with serious repercussions for over-stepping are necessary to keep members in line and the weak system appearing unassailable and functioning better than a ‘free’ (or what one might call a democratic) system. Give power to the dependent members, and the system cracks and falls apart. Guess why the divorce rate is so high in Western countries… (hint, marriage wasn’t a female invention!)
In political dictatorships, whether left- or right-wing, the most censored groups are always the ones who have the potential to do the most damage because of their sheer numbers (e.g., women, the poor), they threaten traditional values (e.g., gays and lesbians; minority religious/cultural groups), or they aren’t ignorant and can’t be brainwashed (e.g., academics or educated professionals). So you see these groups frequently threatened, silenced, disappeared, and used as scapegoats. Nevertheless, in a political dictatorship, ALL people are at risk or punishment if they say something that falls within the set of taboo topics. And for those who think that the US is a political dictatorship, get fucking real. The sheer amount of material that is publicly generated and individual- or group-attributable that insults, criticizes, humiliates, and borderline-threatens the President (the supposed dictator) and that is NOT censored or punished is proof positive that Americans live in a ‘free’ society. Censorship exists, but it is highly population-selective. And btw, corporations are fast becoming the censors, not the government (e.g., think the recent censorship of Trump by Twitter – that was corporation-driven, not governmental). So that is something to think about.
Religious Influence and Obscenity
Religious people spend a shitload of time thinking about sex and trying to control every aspect of people’s existence that is remotely tied to sex. Religious people have been some of the most amoral people in history, ironically, while trying to enforce their own ‘moral’ systems. And censorship is the name of the game coupled with a very heavy system of punishment, including rape, torture and murder. And this applies to every established religion out there. It is not a surprise then that the favourite power and control masked as ‘protection’ has fallen under the auspices censorship on the basis of ‘obscenity’. The prohibition of the teaching of sexual education in schools, forced conversions of gays and lesbians, the banning of all manner of books and art from libraries, galleries, museums, and school curricula, to name a few practices, are common manifestations of censorship falling uner the auspices of protection on the basis of obsenity.
It is actually interesting when considering ends and means that serious feminists and some religious groups may on the surface oppose certain manifestations of ‘art’ while completely disagreeing about why they oppose it. The former oppose ‘obscenity’ on the grounds that it supports and normalizes a patriarchy system that embraces rape, female slavery, poverty, drug addiction, and child abuse, while the religious are just woman-haters that think depictions of the female body, etc. are filthy and are a prime example of why women (not men) should be controlled. And the hoi polloi ignorantly and eroneously groups feminists with religious fanatics, which probably partially explains why many feminists who oppose pornography and prostitution are incorrectly called ‘prudes’, a term that originally was used to describe ‘sexually repressed’ religious people. Being opposed to rape and forced sexuality has nothing to do with prudery or repression; quite the opposite, in fact.
2. Censorship No One Cares About
There is no country or major organization where some form of censorship doesn’t occur. But there is a difference between the censorship that the free-thinking world accepts as a human rights abuse and the censorship that is ignored or just plain old accepted as “the way things are and is it really a big deal anyway…?” One thing you’ll notice about recognized and pooh-poohed censorship is that the former is usually applied to the entire population without egregious prejudice (i.e., in China, censorship applies to all people on all the taboo topics), whereas unrecognized censorship most often occurs in hypocritical First World countries that typically tell the world that they value freedom and honesty while erasing targeted, ‘dangerous’ populations. This is likely why so much Western censorship is dismissed/ignored – if it doesn’t apply to you, you don’t think it is a problem. And guess who is less censored than everyone else in Western societies? Men. So if censorship isn’t happening to men – the shot-callers and reality-definers in every country – then it doesn’t exist (and we say misogyny is less serious or doesn’t exist in Western countries…) Also note that all freedom-loving countries typically have small, but extremely loud, groups of people who complain incessantly about having their rights taken away, but who are usually the most privileged/entitled members of the entire population (males, trannies, religious right-wingers, etc). The actual censored are not loud because they are actually being censored so that no one ever has to hear from them, duh. And if they do make it to public awareness, other tactics, such as painting them as ‘crazy’ are employed. So let’s look at some examples of censorship in ‘free’ countries that people typically don’t acknowledge, accept or are even aware of because it is so effective.
Patriarchy and HIStory
Despite the fact that every civilization throughout time was built and maintained and expanded (if it survived invasion by more aggressive males) using female slave labour, women seldom appear in history books or history curricula in schools. Strangely, growing up and going to school in Canada, I learned more about the short-term oppressions of aboriginals in Canada and Australia, black slaves in the US, and and persecuted Jews in Europe during WWII than I learned about the lives, experiences and history of my own foremothers in Canada, let alone the women who were my foremothers in Ireland and Scotland. I certainly wasn’t taught about Western homosexual oppression either. Why do I know more about the suffering of blacks in a foreign country than I do about the women from whom I actually descended who suffered and survived so that I, myself, exist today? Why is my history as a woman so much less important than basically everyone else on the planet who is not a white female? And why the fuck does no other woman question this? Why is this not strange to women? Why in historical records do we know how many sheep and horses a European male owned, but we don’t even know the name of the wife who slaved for him and suffered his dick and often his fists every day of her life? This is systematic and long-term censorship of female existence. It exists in other cultures as well, but I am speaking for my own. And it is completely unacknowledged.
Speaking solely of my European-descended sisters, why aren’t girls taught about rape and the laws surrounding it historically? Why aren’t we taught about the origins of marriage and why it is the only legal form of slavery left on the planet? Why aren’t we taught about the things men were allowed to do to their wives and get away with it? Why aren’t we taught about the witch trials in Europe and why they targeted women primarily, and about other witchy persecution of women on other continents (the US, various locations in Africa, etc) and why these things happen separately in other places in time, but look eerily similar? Why is the only thing we learn about women the date we got the right to vote in our own country – and why is this presented as the sum total of female achievement in history? Why don’t I know what daily life was like for women of different classes? Why is there this overwhelming assumption no matter where you are in the world that women’s lives have never really been that bad (the implication and ‘evidence’ being that if it was so bad, why didn’t women do anything about it???), that half the world’s population just barely existed with nothing to contribute, nothing to say and were perfectly happy to have it that way, as if it were meant to be?
There is no cultural or historical female pride that is fostered in the school system or in society that is encouraged, promoted, admired and valued in the way that every single ethnic, racial and religious group out there gets (in Western cultures). Girls and women don’t seem to see the big deal in being completely ignorant of their herstory, the herstory of their people, and there is no actual concern that they are not represented in history books, the day-to-day narrative of the human race.
Coming from Canada, where there is a strong tradition of female writing and where the female writers are much more impressive and prolific than the males, why were there no Canadian female writers (let alone female writers from other countries) in my English curricula? Seriously. English was the only subject Canadian children had to take every single year of their formal education, including in high school (grades 9 to 13, which were specific to my province at that time). No female writers taught in a country rich with award-winning female writers. Censorship. Erasure.
When you are not exposed to the works, thoughts, contributions, and history of your people (in my case, white women of Canadian, Irish and Scottish descent), how can you strive to be something? How can you know where you came from? How can you know who and what you are? How can you appreciate what your foremothers did and struggled through? How can you know how little progress has been made – and perhaps that last question gives me the answer as to why girls aren’t taught about their history. We’d see how little we’ve progressed as a sex in the so-called ‘advanced’ First World.
If girls and women are censored, there is nothing to compare their current conditions to, and nothing to blame their oppressors for. Hell you can’t call them oppressors if there is no record of female oppression!
Trans Tyranny: Censoring Lesbians, Scientific Women, Feminists
There are a lot of ways to tell that male trannies are men. One of them is their use of censorship to bolster their very, very weak power base. Like in any dictatorship, their claims are not logical or proveable, are rooted in serious mental illness and personality disorders, and are all about power and control, which is what all males pursue on some level. Like typical dictators, they attack those with less power than themselves (women) rather than go after those presenting legitimate threats (straight men), which confirms that they are seeking power rather than pursuing anything real.
These men have been very successful in getting other powerful bodies (governments, legal, educational, and social organizations, etc) on their side in the censorship of the little opposition there has been to their nonsense, and I suspect that the only reasons they have been so successful is a) because they are men, and b) the opponents being censored are considered politically and socially unacceptable to everyone. Who is being censored? Women who uphold the scientific / biological facts of how sex (not gender!) works. Women, especially women with daughters, who believe women and girls have a right to private space away from biological males with male socialization. Women who know the facts about male violence against women, who know the data concerning male trans violence against women, and who know the psychological literature on why males gravitate towards transing, and who have read extensively the social media masturbation of male trans talking about the things they do and want to do to women and girls. Lesbians who are no longer welcome in the LG groups they were fundamental in establishing and maintaining, and who are vilified for not wanting to be raped by male trans who insist that their cocks are magically ‘female’. Women who acknowledge how little legal control they have over every aspect of their bodies and female status and who oppose the further erasure of their rights and status and the censorships of important words like ‘woman’, ‘vagina’, menstruation, and vocabulary that cannot be separated from the female experience.
And on and on I go. Not many women speak out. The censorship is swift and because of the violent nature of trans and their supporters, can be accompanied by violence. Women can lose their jobs for speaking up, which is censorship. Women can have their blogs shut down, which is censorship. Women are no-platformed at speaking events, which is censorship. Women are destroyed and banned in social media, which is censorship.
And no one acknowledges this in our awesome ‘free’ democracies run on male supremacy. In many ways, in my opinion, I think dictatorships are better than what we have in the West simply because the lies and hypocrisy and selective (but unacknowledged) censorship are much, much worse in the West.
The Rise of Liberalism, Political Correctness, and Selective Censorship
Speaking of hypocrisy, we come to the liberals. Liberalism has been a building political movement in many Western countries for a while. Forget political party names for now. A Liberal party member in the US is not the same as a Liberal party member in Canada, for example. Likely, your country has among its choices, some religious, right-wing group, and some hypocritical, equally nutso, science-abusing, faux-human-rightsy, identity-politicking, left-wing group. Both come from a place of woman-hate (although they pretend they don’t – the former talks about ‘respect’ and ‘tradition’ while the latter talks about women’s ‘freedom’ – all bullshit). So let’s just talk about political leanings, rather than affiliation.
Liberal groups protect themselves from criticism by cloaking their bullshit in superficial human rights jargon. To criticize them immediately makes a person look like a misanthropic, sadistic, murdering, Nazi-type, even when the latter is an actual human rights activist pointing out a hypocritical liberal talking point. These folks fool many by their gung-ho-ness and superficial, at-the-ready mantras and slogans, but they are arguably quite a bit more dangerous than a typical conservative, who puts considerably less effort into trying to appear other than what they are (usually insular, narrow-minded bigots who don’t truly believe in evidence or science). Bascially, you have to work more to figure out what is really going on when a liberal speaks or acts.
Liberals are typically anti-racism warriors, which in and of itself is not a bad thing, except that they do it only when it doesn’t threaten their lifestyles, and they do it at other people’s expense. What does that mean? First, they paint everything as a racist issue in order to censor legitimate criticism, even when there is nothing racist taking place. Second, they don’t really understand what racism is or why it exists, so they censor certain groups of people (for example, white women, who do experience inseparable racism-sexism both in their home countries and abroad) and actually make it impossible for these groups to have a voice when it comes to reporting racist-sexist crime. And think about the language they do censor in various media – American television will bleep out ‘fuck’, but not ‘cunt’ or ‘bitch’. And you never hear the word ‘nigger’ or ‘spic’ in American or Canadian television, while female slurs are a given on most episodes of most series out now. I’ve also noticed the new (and increasing) occurrence of male children calling adult women ‘bitch’. Selective censorship meant to denigrate women and empower males of all races. Third, liberals are possibly worse racists than the purported racists they attack, using groups for political gains rather than to help them (think of all the times liberals trot out the poorly understood plight of Muslim women they don’t even know personally in order to censor the speech of white feminists – ‘at least you’re not a Muslim woman’ is almost a cliché now).
One of the most digusting things liberal Americans have done recently is sexist, racist and a massive, but unacknowledged act of censorship. Planned Parenthood decided to remove Margaret Sanger’s name – the FOUNDER of Planned Parenthood – from the NY clinic. They’ve decided she is racist and a eugenics mastermind. This woman made it possible for today’s women of all races and ages to get an abortion and access to birth control. Planned Parenthood would NOT exist if not for this woman’s bravery and selflessness. I mean think about this. She was born in the fucking 1800’s and fought for women’s right to have the tiniest bit of control over the consequences of their marital, incestuous, workplace, acquaintance, and stranger rapes. This, at a time when women really had little choice about getting married and raped and being forced to breed for their entire lives. And fucking PP decides this heroine has to be erased, shunned, CENSORED. Fuck you Planned Parenthood, you ungrateful, disgusting, woman-hating cunts. My rage when I read about this recently could have set a city block on fire. I don’t give a shit what Sanger believed in the early 1900’s. Her contributions to the world outweigh any personal beliefs about anything. She was still a breeder, which I don’t agree with, but I won’t censor her contribution to female well-being because of that. Liberals are worse censors than conservatives, and represent the hypocrisy of ‘free’ democratic countries in the same way that conservatives represent dictatorships. Both are garbage, male-defined systems, but if I had to choose, dictatorships are so much easier to navigate and threaten everyone equally and without pretense.
Self-Censorship Resulting from Narcisstic Abuse
On a different note, but equally important on the topic of censorship, especially for women is something we’ll call ‘self-censorship’. Very basically, this just means that you prohibit yourself from having a voice. This is one of the major outcomes for people who have survived years of narcissistic abuse, especially as a child. It can also be a specific outcome for women who have been outspoken on EXTREMELY unpopular topics, such as women’s rights, rape, etc. and who have not protected themselves from online public assault. One thing I will say is that all men as well as women who haven’t experienced this kind of abuse will immediately dismiss self-censorship as something that is ‘all in one’s head’ or ‘issues’, the implication being one of weakness, the crime of victimhood leading to a victim mentality, or some other misogynistic bullshit that is uniformly applied to women who have beeen abused and who haven’t ‘bounced back’ with vim and positivity, etc. Ignore those assholes. Psychological abuse is the least acknowledged, but one of the most brutal forms of abuse and can literally destroy self-identity and the ability to properly take care of oneself.
Imagine being a child with a narcissistic (NPD) parent and you grow up in an environment where you are constantly antagonized; everything you say and your very reality are doubted and questioned and negated; you are punished for the most bizarre of things without warning; you are humiliated publicly and/or within family/friend circles; you are given the silent treatment or had love withheld for reasons you can’t discern for days, weeks or longer; you are blamed for things you didn’t do; you are guilted, manipulated, accused of lying or being cruel when you are not; and more. And defending yourself ALWAYS makes things worse. Imagine what that does to a child’s sense of self. One of the things the child learns to do is to make themselves as invisible as possible, to avoid saying anything definitive, to do anything possible not to be a target or rock the boat. This can happen to adults in adult relationships too, but for a child, we are talking about the crucial identity formation experiences that are necessary to grow into a functioning healthy adult with a solid sense of self. As an adult, having gone through all of what I described, you have no confidence in what you believe, often can’t make decisions, and usually avoid saying anything resembling an opinion if you even have one at all. Sometimes, you do have an opinion, but the idea of expressing it is quickly quelled as you start doubting whether it is real, valid or valuable. This is self-censorship.
There is a ton of other forms of selective and unacknowledged censorship that I could discuss here. For example, male language traditions (mankind, Man, manpower, chairman, name change for women in marriage, etc.) is a large topic that is designed to exclude women from every aspect of life, while pretending to include them and that it isn’t really a big deal. Censorship and erasure are very big deals, especially when you consider flipping the situation to favour women. Then you find out what men really think about censorship.
But I won’t get into more here as this topic is truly massive. What people don’t really realize is that the censorship of women on so many levels is so enduring, relentless, and pervasive that it isn’t noticeable. People accept things that, if they thought about it and paid attention, just aren’t right, and that wouldn’t be accepted by racial, ethnic or religious groups or by men. As a lone woman, you cannot change this system, but you can allow a woman her voice in your daily life by reading female authors, upvoting or supporting women’s comments on articles or in social media, listening to female speakers, and giving the little girls in your life the chance to be heard.
Previous posts in the series:
Just in case you still refuse to believe that when it comes to men’s minds, there is no difference between sex and violence, I present the top 3 results when I plugged “battered women” into my search engine of choice this morning. Note that as search engines have become more politcally and economically powerful, our top search results are always targeted advertisements instead of what we are really looking for. And sometimes what women are really looking for is help in life or death situations…
I can’t make this shit up. I was confused at first, and then I realized how perfect it was. I had looked up the exact term: “battered women” and first in the search is an ad for a heterosexual dating site geared towards getting women to be more proactive about finding a rapist. Whoops, I mean boyfriend/husband. I couldn’t have created a more perfect example of how men think.
A male reader (or a cocksucking woman) might see these results a different way as this example is so blatantly male stereotypey to be suspect. Is it possible a woman like me managed to subvert the male logic algorithms for the entire search engine and show women what heterosexual dating really means??? No. Fuck no. Women like me wouldn’t be that cruel and sardonic to an actual battered woman looking for help online. We are fine with criticizing women who choose to fuck men (including bisexuals) and who call it feminism or ‘natural’ or ‘freedom’, but we would never make a nasty joke targeting a woman actively looking for help after being raped and/or having her head bashed in by a male who luvs her.
For all y’all who love the idea of targeted marketing, this is a sweet little example of what it can do for you. Male brainpower at work!!! I love the internet!!1!
Didn’t think the alphabet would make it past ‘A’ (see A is for Antagonism here)? Not to worry, B is here, baby. I had a bit of a hard time choosing the b-word, and I ended up choosing and then rejecting a few possibilities, which is probably why the post took a little longer to get out than I had planned. There are so many good b-words to choose from, and no doubt, they’ll end up being the topics of other posts. For example, b is for bitch (the obvious choice, but I’ve written about this choice slur before here and here, for example), backlash, butch, breeder, brutality, BDSM, brainwashing (don’t worry, I’ve got a series on this delectable topic coming), bullshit, blow job, bias, and more.
But today, B is for Bisexual.
To be honest, I am not sure why I haven’t written about this before. I did a little triptych on sexuality in the past, and I really should have discussed bisexuality within its confines, rather than just acknowledging it as one of the boxes men put women in when rating our level of humanity and dictating options for our identities. Perhaps the goddess of writing intervened and knew I’d need a topic for my alphabet series. Who the hell knows. Point is, I’m doing it now, so buckle up. But if you want to pause and gear up with some light reading from the sexuality writings, and to get the gist of my perspective, the relevant posts are as follows:
Part I: An introduction to male omnisexuality and why heterosexuality is even a thing at all.
Part II: The sex drive and sexuality – human obsessions and two misunderstood and badly abused concepts. Also a brief consideration of homosexuality, asexuality, and forced sexuality.
Part III: Women and forced sexuality. A discussion of female needs, the fact that nobody acknowledges them and why that is the reason we don’t understand the first thing about female sexuality still to this day.
If you don’t feel like veering off at this point, then I’ll just summarize my foundational thinking as follows:
For women, sexuality as we know it now and have known it throughout time and place, is completely constructed. Constructed by men, and embraced by women through their programming. Constructed female sexuality has mostly been categorical, meaning that women are put into boxes according to what men want to do to us and what they want us to do. Men have constructed ‘rational’ / ‘scientific’ and religious explanations for the boxes they put us in to prevent us from figuring out what we actually are naturally, and to inspire us to hate the few women who reject categorization. In reality, our sexuality, if we have any (the true question), should be based on our own self-defined needs, rather than our anatomy or what men need and want. No woman has ever been able to do this outside the influence of male dominance, so my argument is that we haven’t a clue what natural female sexuality looks like at all. Even lesbians are strongly influenced by hetero programming, and I believe they don’t behave completely naturally either. I’ve discussed what natural means in another post, and my opinion is that if you have to construct an entire, rather brutal system geared towards keeping women in line and servicing men ‘happily’, then heterosexuality in women isn’t natural at all. Nature happens without force, intimidation, or indoctrination. Honestly and truly. So men construct our reality and they construct a system of lies and half-truths to support female hetersexuality as being natural. There is a lot of evidence to the contrary, however, which I’m not going to discuss in this post. I will say I’ve been reading some of the scientific literature that clearly demonstrates that despite how women define themselves, the vast majority have sexual reactions to females (google it yourself). There is plenty of work to be done there – I still think you can program sexual reactions to anything (basic learning theory in action), which is constantly evidenced in the development weird sexual fetishes, and I’d argue that women are trained from birth to react sexually to males and violence. The sexual reactions to women that scientists see are likely a mix of natural proclivity and the result of a constant bombardment of female sexualization coupled with the modern day rewarding of female compliance with male sexual fantasies.
But let’s get to bisexuality***. If you try to look up this term/category, most human rightsy sexuality web sites will try to turn it into some long, drawn out definition, almost as if trying to set these folks up for some uber-victim status with a little mystery and sexay-ness thrown in for good measure. “Look at us. We are so hard to define. We break all the sexual molds. No one understands us and we suffer from so much prejudice and bigotry. The alphabet soup acronym should START with B, although in public, we’ll say T is most important… Whine, whine, blah, blah, blah, I want to look at tits while I suck this dick, goober goober.” And it’s usually women who are the whiniest about this bi status, and there is a good reason for that, which I’ll get into later. But bisexual people are a perfect example supporting the theory I have that the loudest victims and victim-groups tend to be non-victims or comparative non-victims with a lot of power (economic, legal, etc.) and free time. Other examples of loud non-victims also include male trannies, rich white males, rich black males, males in general, the religious right in any country, etc., etc.
***[And note that I am writing this from the perspective of a woman who for most of her early adult life used the category ‘bisexual’ privately, and sometimes publicly. I’ve never been ‘heterosexual’, and I currently use the category ‘lesbian’ or ‘gay’ for identification and political purposes, even though I acknowledge that even that category is still male defined and wholly inadequate to describe what women likely are born to be, naturally.]
For an easy definition of bisexuality, just think ‘bi’ = two and sex = attraction to and sexual engagement with. So bisexuals basically get it on with both males and females. There is some talk of ‘pansexuality’, but this is a bullshit made-up liberal term based on the idea that there are more than two sexes – WHICH THERE ARE NOT.
A quick word about bisexual men. Nothing about this surprises me. I’ve said it in the post above, males are born omnisexual, which just means that they get turned on by and will fuck anything and everything unless something stops them. The only reason most males (publicly) gravitate towards heterosexual designations is because of woman-hate; innate power and control issues; and servitude/extra perks. First, the idea of ‘taking it’ like a woman is an insult because men hate women, so being gay or bi means you are like a woman and that is unacceptable in all cultures because women are garbage. That is obvious and doesn’t need explaining further. The second part: power and control. More complicated. Men like easy victims who won’t fight back or rat them out. Inanimate objects are ideal for male masturbation, but men don’t get the satisfaction of controlling or overpowering say, a sock or a hole in the wall or their kid’s stuffed toys. Animals give the sense of overpowering and control that men like, but they can fight back and hurt their rapist, and as well, men don’t get any servitude from them. Children, like animals, are easy targets, can give the satisfaction of control and power over them, and while they usually won’t bite or fight like an animal, there is the possibility they might report the assault to a grown-up. And no servitude perks. But women? They make the perfect masturbatory devices for men: raping them allows men to enact their hatred of them upon their bodies and minds; they are controllable and over-powerable physically and mentally; they seldom report rape (and are not believed if they do report); they are easily programmed from birth to accept slavery as desirable; and the third element of heterosexual gravitation is that women will also provide cleaning services, baby factory services, emotional services, intellectual services and more – all making men’s lives easier and ensuring the greatest possible chance of male success in the world. So while men will fuck all of the above in private, there is the most to be gained from publicly proclaiming hetero status. Bisexual men are slightly braver in that they are willing to admit they fuck men too, but they also get the status that fucking women allows in all societies. But generally, it isn’t men who whine about bisexual prejudice as men never suffer as much as women, regardless of the bias involved.
I’m going to come out and say this as bluntly as possible, and it will be offensive to some and I don’t care. There is no such thing as a truly bisexual woman. Omnisexual men, yes – I’ve explained this already. But I don’t believe women are naturally wired to want men. I believe female heterosexuality is nearly 100% constructed / programmed / conditioned (pick your term). So bisexuality doesn’t make sense either, especially given that pretty much all bisexual women mostly fuck men (I remember some feminist I read quoted a study that the typical bi-female sexual stable constists primarily of men. And I argue that that is standard hetero brainwashing kicking in rather than anything natural.) I also think there are a few kinds of bisexual women, and I’ll discuss two primary categories.
- Brainwashed women whose hetero programming didn’t work perfectly
So as was mentioned, most bisexual women have more male partners than female ones, and usually end up having a primary or significant-other relationship with a man. Women usually are ‘side dishes’ that don’t provided the (economic, legal, social) perks that relationships with men do, but that provide emotional and sexual satisfaction that is missing from the typical hetero relationship. Bisexual women are, somewhat understandably in our rape culture, generally massive cowards (unlike male bisexuals) who will hide behind hetero life when it suits them (e.g., to avoid danger, to get jobs, to have a higher standard of living, to appear ‘normal’ in social situations, etc.) and trot it out when they want to look cool or liberal or advanced or open-minded or ‘above’ heteronormativity (even though they are still exceptionally heternormative themselves). Or just to temporarily satisfy the natural lesbian that they are.
2. Brainwashed women who use other women to pick up men and get hetero cookies
Bisexual men don’t make out with each other to pick up women, but ‘bisexual’ women try to pick up men this way. Do you not find this curious? If you are a hetero or bi woman reading this, do a little self-examination at this point. Do you regularly watch gay male porn? Do you regularly masturbate while imagining dudes fucking each other? Do you get off on the idea of inserting yourself into a gay male sex scenario and announcing that your pussy is there and things can actually get started now? If you say yes, you are a fucking liar and are being contrary on purpose (let’s check you for NPD…) Women, hetero, bi or lesbian do not cream at the idea of infiltrating a cock party. And gay men aren’t sitting around wishing for some pussy to spice up their sex lives. So why do so many bisexual women feel the need to put on a show for men?
Well, first there is no bisexuality going on there. These are thoroughly programmed hetero women who are just trying to please men in the only way they know how. I wonder to myself whether these women actually enjoy what is going on. I really think that most women don’t fully experience what they are doing or analyze what they are doing. I think most women’s brains are trained to see themselves through men’s eyes.
Oh, in case you are wondering, when I called myself bisexual, I fell into category 1. However, I know I was less successfully brainwashed than the average woman, as I finally woke up, relatively easily, I think, and realized that I hated men on a fundamental and very natural or primal level. The in-depth self examination I had to do in order to deprogram myself was painful and is ongoing. I trained myself to live in my own body and mind and to experience things from my own perspective – it is a truly bizarre thing to realize that you see yourself, go through experiences, and even have dreams through men’s eyes. Being back in your body and mind is a really disarming thing at first. It affects everything you do, but you realize that hetero sex (intercourse/rape) is a horrible thing to endure – absofuckinglutely pointless and more than that – dangerous to your body and mind. You look back on what you did in the past and it is hard to understand how you participated, if you can call it that. I think you have to dissociate as well as outsource your validation needs in order to allow males to use your body and to keep going back for more. I’ll discuss this more when I get to my brainwashing series in the discussions of deprogramming. The point I’m trying to make here is that bisexuality is just another male construction, a box women are allowed to live in, even though it is neither natural nor healthy for them.
A Few Major Bisexual Complaints
Bisexuals have a LOT of complaints. I’ve read a lot, and I don’t understand most of these complaints, even having spent many years as a bisexual. I’ll address a few.
1) We don’t fit in anywhere. Heteros hate us and gays/lesbians reject us.
Any prejudice you experience is because of woman hate. The heteros hate you because you are not upholding patriarchy – you males are not raping women enough, and you women are not being raped enough. Gays and lesbians might reject you because of your hetero privilege which you still have because most of the time you are being hetero. Duh. Lesbians especially, who live at the bottom of the human shit heap, are not interested in having male diseases passed to them by careless bisexual women, nor are they interested in investing in someone who will fuck them and then prance off when she has a chance at an economically attractive and socially acceptable hetero lifestyle opportunity if (when) it comes along (especially if said bi wants to breed). It is not possible for a powerless and ubiquitously hated group (lesbians) to have the kind of power over you or dictate your freedom in the world. It amazes me how many self-indulgent articles there are on bisexuals blaming lesbians for everything wrong in their lives. You may experience bias rooted in woman-hate, but you also perpetuate it. Self-examination needed.
2) People tell us we don’t exist.
Remind you of anything? The fucking trans pull the same shit. Nobody is denying your existence. You are human, you exist, and you can believe whatever the hell you want. I am likely one of very few people who will say that I don’t believe that bisexuality is a thing. Males yes (although, like I said, I call it omnisexuality). Women aren’t wired to put their bodies at risk or enslave themselves. Sorry.
Do you deserve more attention in the LG-alphabet group? If so, why? You have the best of both worlds, really. You get to CHOOSE what and who you do. Gays and lesbians who are committed to their sexuality are so much worse off than you and are more based in reality (and less whiny) than the bisexual community. While gays and lesbians might be able to pass in hetero society based on appearance, they certainly can’t pass socially unless they show up solo to events or never, ever speak about their personal lives. So, in my opinion, I wouldn’t include you in the gay-lesbian activist groups, just as I would exclude the trannies and the queer, Hitler-youth brigade and any other post-modernist bullshit “I’m different! Look at me!’ groups. Make your own fucking group. And stop trying to force lesbians to accept you. Nobody should be forced to fuck you. That is called rape. (Hint, this applies to trannies too, who keep trying to force lesbians to be with them.) No one owes you a fuck in order to validate your claims of specialness or outsiderness.
3) People assume we are pedophiles
This one is legit, but like with the most valid complaints, the reason they happen is because of woman-hate and the anti-gay sentiments that exist everywhere. You aren’t assumed to be a pedophile because you are bisexual. Straight men, who comprise the vast majority of pedophiles in the world, are never assumed to be so. Gay men are. Lesbians get this too, to a certain extent. In reality, there are very few true female pedophiles. The same 1-2 weird incarcerated female high school teachers with teen boy student lover (coupled with tons of television sitcom episodes focusing on this topic) are covered to death to promote the idea that women are equally likely to be pedophiles as men. Not even close to being true. This is a whole nuther topic. But suffice it to say that if you are lesbian or a female bisexual, you may experience fear on the part of women with children. Not so much by men – men will sexualize you for THEIR sexual purposes rather than assume you are going to attack children. Myself, I did experience this with my sister when I confided in her that I was bisexual in my mid-20’s. She had a 4-year-old daughter at the time, and after my quiet announcement, she never let me be in a room alone with my neice ever again. I’ll repeat that it was not the bisexuality that was the problem in my sister’s mind, but the lesbian part of it which was the motivator for the irrational and hateful reaction.
Conclusion here. Bisexuals can be very touchy and defensive. And loud, if they are ‘out’. Like the trans. Much more so than you ever experience with gays and lesbians. While the latter tend to be much more secure in their identities once they’ve chosen to come out, bisexuals’ reactivity is more likely to be a product of a constructed victimhood, hard-to-pin-down identity, and comparative privilege (I hate that word, but I don’t have a better one right now) over actual victimized groups. Their predation within oppressed groups (i.e., trying to force lesbians to want them sexually) likely creates a little cognitive dissonance concerning whether they are more victim or predator or both.
Anyhow, like with the whole silly, but scary, trannie movement, I wish this one didn’t take up so much retail space…
If you want to be a good and effective feminist (jeez, I really need to let go of that word, as it is meaningless today), you have to let go of making exceptions for men. We women are trained from birth to forgive males all their trespasses, give males the benefit of the doubt, give males second chances (and then third and then fourth, ad nauseum), teach males how to be human and allowing them to make their mistakes on our bodies; be patient with their neanderthal ways; keep our mouths shut when they inevitably trample our souls, bodies, and rights into the mud; defend all the shithead males in our lives when they hurt some woman (including us); and most importantly, beat the living shit out of outspoken women who point out male abuses and who demand that something be done.
It is tempting to allow them into our lives because the basic and superficial benefits are manyfold. For most women, males allow a better standard of living than would be possible on one’s own as a woman. Males are also tapped into the Old Boy’s Network, and jobs can be had by orbiting this network as some males throw women a bone if they can’t think of a male who would be suited for the job. Males may also provide services such as moving heavy shit, fixing electronics or toilets (which women are fully capable of learning how to do themselves, by the way), intimidating unwanted outsider male advances or exploitation (aka ‘protection services’), and a whole host of other jobs that males made up to pretend they are absofuckinglutely necessary in our world. So most women keep males around simply because they have created a system and set of beliefs where women don’t do as well without them. Note that women do better psychologically without men, however. That point is never pointed out in the heterosexual world.
One of the other things that makes males more attractive to keep around is the fact that women gravitate towards men and servicing them rather than cultivating serious female friendships. It gets lonely out there and even if you want female friendships, they are very, very hard to achieve, especially as you get older, if you are not in a traditional workplace or school, if you’re are not straight, and if you don’t have children. Some women might consider interacting with men simply to have people to sort of talk to (if it is possible to have an equal give-take conversation with a male. It’s not, imo.)
I wrestled with this very issue the other day. As I have mentioned in previous posts, I am extremely socially isolated right now, despite living in a place where I have to share amenities. I barely socialize here, partly by choice and partly because nobody seems to be interested in the few middle-aged or older women living here. So recently, I got back into meetup dot com, which I had been using in the US before The Virus hit. There isn’t a heck of a lot going on for obvious reasons. I just joined a French convo group, although all meetings are online, which is less interesting. And I found a group specifically for people who deliberately don’t have kids. I contacted the organizer to ask whether they were holding any events. The organizer is a young male. We have a few similar interests, including language-learning. Upon writing back, he mentioned that people hadn’t showed much enthusiasm once The Virus was in full swing. And after some online back and forth about languages, he suggested that we could meet one-on-one for an outdoor coffee. I let a few days go by, my instincts, experience, and what I would consider a moral commitment to feminism (female separatism) wrestling with my need to speak to an actual human in person for more than a few minutes in a social context.
Here’s the thing. Males are soooo fucking hard to talk to, in general, once you’ve started deprogramming. Even the ‘nice’ or ‘smart’ ones can be so overbearing. I almost always feel soul-sucked, dominated, and that I have to spend so much more time listening than I get to contribute in the way that men feel they deserve to contribute. I reasoned with myself that it wasn’t worth it to risk being soul-sucked at a time when I am soul-hungry. And of course, sticking to the principles I’ve committed myself to as a female separatist is important. I know I am practically alone in this. Women sell out all time time and become collaborators in patriarchy and misogyny, and reason that they do what they do to ‘survive’ (most of which is usally absolute fucking bullshit, in my opinion). So I may suffer consequences in terms of brain atropy and potential connection-making in a town where I have no connections and barely speak to anyone, but I have to stick to my guns. For me. For women. For principles.
Long story short, after not responding to the invitation for a length of time bordering on rude, I slithered out of a coffee meeting with finesse and a believable excuse. I had learned from the best after all my years in China. The Chinese are expert excuse makers and contract-breakers, and constantly make excuses for not doing what they actually commit to. I think I’ll occasionally talk online with the group organizer about language and other innocuous things until the group feels safe in reconvening once more. Most of the group is actually female, which is inspiring and the only reason why I joined in the first place. One of the only good things about being in the West again is that you can actually meet women your age who are deliberate non-breeders. I didn’t meet a single adult non-breeder in China. They may exist, but they are rare.
Anyhow, before I devolve into an alcohol-fuelled rant about China, I’ll close with this: when it comes to males, it seems you have to weigh your pro-female principles against what you consider to be survival. On many levels, all males are the same – never forget that. The idea that ‘this one’ll be different’ is a fairytale we tell ourselves to justify the easy road we take. They will feed off you, even if it is subtle, and all benefits you think you are getting come at a cost. You make connections with them at your own risk. And of course, every single thing a woman does is political and affects the status and freedom of all other women. Collaborate with men, and you prevent anything from getting better for all women. Really simple, but hard to accept.
Happy new year. Does it feel like a new year? In many ways, no. This effing Virus is well into its second year now, and many of us are bored, depressed, not too hopeful, wondering when things will go back to normal, or whether we’ve got a new normal. Some of us are seriously isolated. Myself, I haven’t had an in-person conversation with another human that lasted longer than 5 minutes in months – I’ve noticed that people, especially women, seem to have a serious aversion to speaking to middle aged and older women. We’re invisible. But it’s more than that. It almost seems like there is a discomfort and dismissal on the part of those with whom you are trying to engage. It is hard to explain. Strangely, everyone seems to want to engage with weird men of any age, even when they stink to high heaven, are narcissistic, talk too much or too loudly, are offensive, and add whatever you want to the list. Seriously. I just can’t understand why it is more attractive to talk to some repulsive, self-centred pervball, but not to a friendly female who isn’t gaming to rape you or suck your energy with unbridled egomania and scrotal tall tales of imagined accomplishments and prowess.
In addition, I’m finding it really hard to catch the eye of fellow sisters while out for a walk on the street or walking trails – something I usually try to do no matter where in the world I am. I get the distinct impression that there is this bizarre notion that connecting with fellow humans, even just through eye contact, somehow puts you at risk for contracting The Virus. I used to live in the place where I currently am, and it’s not an unfriendly place, generally. But it feels very different here than it used to. Paranoid. And no longer a community. Selective disconnect.
Anyhow, I’m totally off track, but my excuse is that it is my first post of the new year, so some preamble was warranted. I wanted to kick off an hommage – or perhaps I should say femmage, as I love franglais and neologisms, both – to Sue Grafton and her Alphabet series. Years ago, I fell in love with Kinsey Millhone, private detective, with her minimalistic lifestyle, low income, and creative tiny house living space. Her only fault was her constructed and frankly unbelievable heterosexuality – she really never came across as anything but asexual or lesbian to me, but luckily, you could just flip a few pages to skip over the luckily sparse sexual content (thank you 1980’s – it would be a different story today à la 50 shades of shit).
We’ll see how far I get. I’m kicking it off with A Is for Antagonism. There is no recurring character, and this isn’t a novel. And jeez, there is no mystery in what I write, despite the fact that most women just don’t seem to be able to figure out why men do what they do and why they themselves just can’t stop spreading their legs for them. Mystery is not the same thing as willing ignorance and cognitive dissonance, let me tell you. Open your eyes to reality and the privilege you orbit is no longer possible. Case closed!
Now before I get into it, there are tons of A-words I could have chosen here. A is for asshole, assault, aggression, arrogance, affirmative action, ‘alleged’, abortion, and more. But I chose antagonism, a highy underappreciated word.
So let’s go. Very simply put, antagonism is active hostility or opposition. Think of someone who seems deliberately to disagree with everything you say, or someone who pokes at you, saying provocative things that seem deliberately geared towards riling you up or getting some sort of reaction (anger, tears, defensiveness, etc) out of you. Interestingly, in literature, the ‘antagonist’ is typically seen as a villain, nemesis or chief opposition to the hero of the story, designed to cause problems or allow for a plot to exist at all.
I want to talk about antagonism in two specific, but not necessarily unrelated, categories: Male communication styles and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).
- Male Communication Styles
Let me draw from one of my ESL lectures on language and communication – I tell all my students that the purpose of language is to try to get what we want or need. It is one of human’s most basic and useful tools. If you don’t communicate, you don’t get what you need, from trying to find food or a toilet in a new place to trying to get a job. Now, to understand how males typically use this tool outside of toilets or getting directions, let’s cover a few truths. a) Males are both wired and socialized to believe that they deserve. Everything and anything they need or want becomes crucial and deserved. b) Males are also wired and socialized to be aggressive, so getting what they believe they deserve is best achieved through aggression of one form or another. c) Most males realize on some level that they aren’t important, have less to offer the world than females, and could be done away with without serious repurcussions in the long run (obsolescence). Most males can’t articulate that, but they know it on some lizard brain level and use aggression and a focus on ‘deserving’ to cover up their biological inadequacies.
But back to language. All of the above factor into the way males often communicate, especially with females they see as threats to their fragile egos in an attempt to prove that they are important, and better, and deserving, and not obsolete. An aggressive communication style is often used on perceived superior women (e.g., intelligent, educated, non-naive, older, uninterested, extremely attractive, and/or sexually unavailable women) and is usually manifested as antagonism. Now, some men use antagonism as a bizarre, but often effective (why? ask a hetero chick, cuz I don’t get it…) means of flirting. But antagonism is most often used by men as an attempt to disarm women, to steal their energy, and to divert their laser focus away from the inadequacies and flimsy lies and exaggerations of said male. Men will question and/or disagree with and/or dissect every statement a woman makes in a conversation. He will pick apart decisions she has made and is describing to him, and criticize everything about it in an attempt to make her defend herself or even fall apart. He will goad her to prove every detail she states, often expecting citations of studies or data. He will often ask her to recite lists of things to prove the extent of her knowledge on a subject and pounce on any error she makes as proof of her inadequacy, even a subject on the outskirts of the topic of conversation.
As I look back, I have have had sooooo many interactions of this sort with males through my life. Now, I’m not surprised – I am often a threat to men as I am smart, educated, well trained in pscyhology, sexually unavailable, I see through bullshit easily, and if I am feeling brave and devil may care, I can give better mindfuckery than I get. I am a massive threat to all insecure men who think they deserve and are used to most women giving them literal or figurative blowjobs for existing. Interestingly, the abusive male living in the house I was renting in when I first moved back to Canada spoke to all the women in the house using this style. I remember one specific conversation involving him, myself, and one of the cock-whipped hetero women, where the male kept picking at the latter over something she did that she was telling us about. She accused him of being jealous, but I countered with an accusation of being antagonistic. Only a month or two later, after he started making threats against my physical safety did I start putting the whole shebang together – which brings me to my second category of antagonist.
2. Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)
It’s important to note that while many males employ antagonistic communication styles with women, most of these guys do not have NPD. Antagonism can just be a way that males deal with their usually subconscious awareness of their inadequacy and obsolescence as males. Also, note that narcissism and NPD are not the same. You can be a narcissist (very self-centred, vain, selfish) without a personality disorder (ingrained personality pattern that disrupts your day-to-day functioning and relationships). Both males and females can have NPD and thus can be antagonistic, but there are almost double the number of male NPDs than females (likely more because we accept narcissism and abusive behaviour in males and thus may not suspect that a male is anything but normal), which makes sense if you understand the disorder and the biological reality of males. As an aside, published research shows that young people, males, blacks, and, to a lesser extent, other minorities have higher prevalence of lifetime NPD than do older people, females, and non-Hispanic whites. You can google all that if you are interested – myself, I’m not getting into the whys and implications of race or age relationships with narcissistic disorders here – my focus is, as always, on male bullshit and how it affects women and girls. I have a great deal of personal experience with NPD family members, and what I will say is that the abuse they dish out is worse and more damaging to the core self than physical abuse. Most survivors of narcissistic and physical abuse will also tell you that. I’ll write more about my NPD experience in another post.
Antagonism is a chief trait of narcissists, and specifically, those with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). The arrogance, constant arguing, and pathological need to exploit people are warning signs that you are dealing with a very dangerous and destructive person with a problem that is likely never, ever, ever going to change no matter how much you try to help them.
Regardless of whether you are dealing with a weak ass male with ego problems or a true blue NPD, my advice is to get away as soon as you can. If you are stuck in a relationship (family, work situation) with them, you have a decision to make: develop strategies that will allow you to reduce the effects of antagonistic attacks (or avoid them as much as you can), or get the hell out. I always do the latter, but it comes at a very high cost. Worth it to me, but you have to weigh your options according to your own needs.
Trust me, I have more heady stuff in the works, but I wanted to send out a short message to all women on this Christmas Eve. I don’t normally send Christmas greetings, but I’m working through my complicated feelings about the holiday. Mother made it miserable in childhood with her covert narcissism and materialism. Father destroyed any cultural enjoyment in early adulthood as over-compensation for and white guilt over existing in predominantly British Canada, with British traditions, when he married a Jewish woman. And then it has been years of aloneness at a time that is expressly devoted to families, coupled with living for years and years in a non-Christmas culture (Asia). Normally, I was working on Christmas Day. I didn’t have to think about it.
Last Christmas, I was in the US, abandoned by all housemates and thus alone. This year, I’m in Canada in my weird, asocial hostel situation. Interestingly, most of the people sending me greetings are my Chinese friends and former students, the sweethearts. But I acknowledge that despite my aloneness and mild loneliness, AT LEAST there are no male abusers ruining everything. But I divide my thinking as follows:
a) it is okay to observe cultural rituals as an atheist, and Christmas is as much a cultural holiday as it is a religious one. Christmas is Pagan in its origins, taken over by Christians, bastardized by capitalists, but there is this really nice cultural aspect of the holiday that non-capitalistic, history-enjoying atheists can revel in or at least observe with appreciation. I’m in the long process of healing from the Christmas mangling of narcissistic parents as well as white liberal race- and culture-shaming, and finding my own associations to the holiday. It is interesting. And welcome. I’m sick of being part of the only cultural group on the planet pressured to deny my culture.
b) Equally importantly, I think about all the women and girls in forced family situations, especially during this weird COVID time, doing most of the work, engaging in unwelcome interactions, stuck for days with unlikeables and keeping a brave face. Holidays can be tense and stressful at the best of times for many people as one deals with rituals that are forced rather than cherished, and coupled with drinking, it is not always a fun time. Myself, I removed myself early on from family abuses, but not all people are willing to take such drastic steps to preserve mental health because it is hard to weigh which will end up being worse – being completely alone, isolated, silent and unwanted; or being abused, but belonging to a group. What a choice, huh?
Anyhow, I’ll end this by wishing you all a Merry Christmas and hoping you get through the holiday safely and remembering that any gaslighting or manipulation or general nastiness you may be exposed to by toxic family members is not about you at all.
Oh, the lie that is gender. Before I start, let me get this out of the way. Men and women as sexes are biologically different. There cannot be a concept of ‘equality’ between males and females simply because we are biologically, sexually different. And let me clear that up. You’ll already know what I’m going to say if you’ve read further on this blog.
First, gender is a sociological construct that creates forced, FALSE differences between males and females with the sole purpose of keeping men in power and women’s necks under men’s boots and mindlessly devoted to (enslaved by) them. That is it. The modern idea of replacing the meaningful, factual designation of SEX with gender is nefarious and intentionally done to hurt women and girls. Period. It is part of the po-mo, liberal and trannie movements over the past few decades, with very harmful results.
Second, that males and females are biologically different means something different than the intention of purposeful differentiation of males and females using gender. When I (and all scientific, brain-using people) say that males and females are different, we are not saying (unlike the gender users) that males are superior or that males and females are complementary beings with skill sets that fit together like a puzzle even though ‘female’ traits are still less valued and inferior to males’. No. What I mean is that biologically, males are born with destructive, sadistic, violent tendencies. Biologically, females are not. There are exceptions (like in every fucking evidence-based theory in history). But thousands of years of factual evidence that males commit almost all of the violent, murderous, torture-for-pleasure-based acts in every corner of the earth makes a few exceptions completely irrelevant. What are NOT sex-based differences are valued and undervalued skills. Males and females are born with equally distributed potential for skill development (meaning that math or engineering are not inborn male skills, and childcare and cleaning are not inborn female skills). I do think that some personality traits are more inherent in women, such as empathy and both patient detail and big picture thinking capabilities, and other traits are more common in men, such as psychopathy and limited range, but deep and violent emotionality. And for this reason, women are more likely to accept abuse without violent retaliation, and men are more likely to act violently for little to no reason at all. And also for these biological reasons, women remain under the control of men and men rape, kill, and just generally destroy with impunity and without a second thought as to what they have done. Ha, unless they are caught, and oh the crocodile tears and fake remorse.
But let me get to the question in my title. I’ve probably already indirectly answered it in the previous paragraphs. But I’ll spell it out.
I can’t tell you how many women (never mind the men) who buy into this idea of males and females complementing each other, and thus seeing ‘evidence’ (not evidence in the real sense, but as defined by religion or patriarchal mythology) that males and females need to partner and work together, of course, with females subordinating themselves with their necessary, but inferior skills. I remember, in particular, this horrific conversation I had in China years ago with two brilliant, talented women, one older Chinese and one younger Russian. And both of them, despite their amazingness, firmly believed that women couldn’t do so many of the skills that men could do, especially math. I bristled. I was always top of my class in math, and one of my masters degrees is in a quantitative, statistics-heavy field. But man-fucking as a female requires this kind of brain-dead assessment and self-denigration and belief in incompleteness, I remembered.
I also remembered my days of cowardly bisexuality. The misery of it, feeling my wings clipped, forced into a cage of self-limitation and pretending that the male in my life wasn’t half of what I was a person intellectually, emotionally, and in terms of learning and skills achieved. I remembered the freeing feeling I always had when the relationship inevitably ended after some particularly misogynistic event, like when he ended up raping me, shaming me, taking me for granted, or threatening me. Being alone, single, I realized that I had everything I needed in myself. I was balanced, able to do what I needed. A male was the anchor manacled to my ankle dragging me underwater (I know, I know, I am mixing a bunch of metaphors throughout this post). In essence, ending the hetero prison made me soar in many ways.
Men don’t build you up. They don’t have inherent skills that are barred to you as a woman. You bar yourself from being whole when you choose males. They might initially give you a false sense of being essential in some incomprehensible, womanly way. But over time, you’ll feel the drag. You are no longer soaring through air or across water (pick your metaphor). You are sinking, and fucking exhausted, and wondering why.
You don’t have to be a full-on lesbian to be free. Celibacy or asexuality work as well. You just have to let go of this idea than you need a man to complete you. You are complete when you enter this world. A whole being just from being born female.
Men can’t say that. In fact, they tell us the truth about themselves in so many ways every single day. Hence the need to control us and use us for our innate wholeness, innate balance. They are the incomplete, unbalanced ones, and parasitical at that.
I have to admit I’m a little down lately. Despite being a person who expects little from people, situations, and life in general, I’ve managed to become disappointed and once again worn down by life in North America. If you’ve never read further on this site, the context for this comment is this: I frequently live and work abroad; I left a nearly decade-long stint in China at the end of July 2019; I spent a year in the US studying and trying to navigate a possible career change; and then the Virus hit, all my plans went to hell, and I was forced to return to my homeland – Canada – a country I thought I might never return to again other than to visit.
China is a really racist, sexist, and chaotic, but uber-controlled country. It was hard. But I adapted. I was employed, I cultivated a small, but excellent group of local friends, and equally important, I had an apartment that was all mine despite being black moldy and not very cosy. I’ve spent most of my adult life living alone, and I’ve come to see it as a luxury, even when my space is not optimal. I just don’t like living with people. And I especially don’t like living in places where I have no control over who else is living there.
The year in the US was pretty brutal in a lot of ways. First the culture shock – not sure if that is the right word – was kind of surprising. I think in the year and a half since leaving Asia, I’ve realized that if I am going to be an outcast, I need to be a full-on outcast that has no hope or expectation (by self or others) of ever fitting in. Even more than in early adulthood, I just don’t think I can fit into regular society here – and that seems like a simple and precious thing to say, but it is really complicated in a way that you will never understand unless you’ve lived outside your country for years and years at a time.
The US also showed me that women don’t have it better in the West. We are constantly battered with the idea that “women are equal now” and “Western (especially white) women are better off than all other women, so stfu.” But I have to tell you, no, the misogyny is just as bad here as anywhere else. It just looks different. And the less money you have, the worse it is. Because of the lifelong brainwashing, selective women’s history (if any) taught in public schools, and a general unwillingness to self-examine because it’s “too negative” or victimy, the majority of women just don’t see it. And I’d bet that in countries that Western women typically tsk tsk over, those women also don’t really see what they experience as anything other than “that’s life, the way it’s supposed to be”.
I had some good experiences during my year in the US. I was studying plants, for one. And then the Virus hit, which was actually a good thing in some ways – I was able to get some tuition money back after my male teachers decided they didn’t want to work anymore, and continued my plant education by myself outside the classroom by going on 5-10 mile hikes every day. But I spent way too much of my small, scrupulously accumulated savings on keeping wealthy people wealthy through overpriced accommodation. I also contracted a staph infection that has recurred 5 times, manifesting in massive, painful and disgusting abcesses. Antibiotics are NOT something one should be taking regularly, and I’ve had 4 hardcore rounds in less than a year. I swear, if you want to contract a brutal disease, go to the US, not a Third World country. But possibly tied for worst – I haven’t lived alone since I left China – the bad part being that I have lived with some of the most horrible and abusive men and women I have ever met, and paid my hard-earned money for the privilege. Ouch. Once the Virus was in play, housing became even more insecure. I was terrified of being kicked out with literally nowhere to go if I contracted even a small cough. The crazy landlady I lived with during the first few months of the outbreak forced one of the other tenants out when she got a cold. It was stressful.
But you know, despite some pretty seriously shitty stuff going on while in the US, my spirits were good. It was not until I returned to Canada that I started to get depressed. This country is about poverty for me. I spent most of my Canada-side adult years living in poverty, and being back is no different. I have no contacts or references here. I’m an overeducated, middle-aged female and white – all of those working against me in a city with 11% unemployment and a government focused on making sure immigrants have jobs.
And I’m still living with people. And it has been all about male violence. I just moved from a shared house where an older male verbally attacked me and threatened to physically attack me because I wasn’t looking at or speaking to him correctly (we all know what that means – he wasn’t getting the deference and respect he thought he deserved). I just moved out of that house in the burbs to a downtown hostel that accepts month-to-month renters. I had stayed here when I first moved to this city for a job 20 years ago. But things seem to have gone downhill with increased poverty/income gaps and with the stress of the Virus. In a week’s time, there have been two major violent male episodes – luckily not with me. But they were terrifying. One – a verbal screaming match between staff and a male who (as usual) didn’t think he needed to follow the Virus rules mandated by the hostel. The second – a male did something the staff didn’t like and they refused to let him back into the building to go to his room. It was a long ordeal, poorly handled by the staff, that escalated until the male smashed the entire plexiglass wall going from lobby counter to ceiling, and smashed computers and various things on the check-in desk. No cops ever seem to be called here. I took the least expensive room. It is in a hallway beside the lobby. It is a tiny, tiny room with no window. There is an immense amount of noise 24/7 due to people traipsing by or accessing a bank of METAL lockers right beside my door at 2 or 4 in the morning. They are raising the rent significantly next month despite being down season for travellers. It does have a bit of a half-way house feel to it. Or even a homeless shelter (given the male violence and the creepy, listless air of some of the male guests), except that I am paying for the privilege.
As much as I wanted to move on from teaching English to unmotivated, cell-phone addicted students, I’m almost wishing the Virus were over so I could escape Canada, take another teaching job, and have a job and a small private living space away from men again.
Bottom line: the West is just as dangerous and stressful for women as it is in other parts of the world. The income gap and access to affordable and secure housing issues are as serious here as they are in many places. The less money you have as a woman, the more exposed you are to dangerous situations caused by males. And yet Western countries are more and more obsessed with racial diversity and less and less focused on the fact that women are the most at-risk group STILL and face more challenges economically than men of any race.
Let’s hope 2021 brings a better year for us and that we all make it there unhurt by the men around us.
Likely, everyone is sick of hearing about The Virus and everything Virus-related. Just as I write this, it occurs to me that it has been on my personal radar since it hit China. I have so many contacts – friends, former students and former colleagues – back in China, that I was in frequent contact with during Chinese New Year – before it was a serious thought in the minds of most people in the rest of the world. Myself, I got hit with a brutal illness at the very end of December that lasted until the end of January, the cough even longer. At that time, everyone was talking about an unusually nasty flu season, but this was like no flu I had ever had. I’ve never had a cough accompany a flu before, and I’ve never had a fever and chills and debilitating weakness with a throat infection. But there was no testing in January, so who knows what the hell it was. But I caught it shortly after riding a Greyhound bus inbound from Seattle on its way to L.A. And there was one super sick dude on that bus who was coughing all over the rest of us on the bus…
Fast-forward 10 months. I’m safely harboured away in Canada on an island region of about a million people – we’ve had a total of about 200 cases since it all began. Pretty good. A significant number of those cases came from a single house party of drunken idiots, luckily in a small up-island community and not adjacent to the larger southern metropolis and thus pretty isolated. And this has been common around North America – drunken house parties and congregating in bars seems to be the number one way to get The Virus (also the number one way to get raped, if you’re female! And alcohol isn’t a dangerous drug…!) People are generally pretty hard-core about following protocols in my region. There is a large proportion of elderly people here, for one. Also, and this is significant, my province is taking direction from a smart, rational, and surprisingly well-liked female doctor. Leadership is key in managing crises, and it is always better to put a woman in charge. We are just better at strategy, planning, taking threats seriously, and reacting rationally and without brutality. And this is in evidence around the world and throughout time. Now if you want death, destruction and general mayhem, by all means, put a man in charge.
And speaking of men, just an anecdote. When I got out of quarantine following my arrival from the US, I immediately headed to the ferry terminal for my crossing to the islands. You are supposed to wear face masks on board and they are keeping car people in their cars and walk-on people have a limited run of the passenger area of the ferry. Sensible. Now, as I was watching people disembark from an arriving ferry, I heard the din of shrill male voices. Two men were having the following conversation:
Dudebro 1: Well, it was great to have met you, brah. I can’t tell you how great it is to meet a rare fellow free-thinker these days.
Dudebro 2: Yeah, man. You can tell the free-thinkers – we’re the ones not wearing masks, guffaw, guffaw.
Dudebro 1: Right on. Like the rest of the sheep... Goober goober, scrotal babble drifting away on the wind and out of earshot.
Men truly tickle themselves at how smart they think they are. Constantly self-labelling as ‘rational’, ‘logical’, ‘free-thinking’, and you name it. I mean, there is a shit ton of research out there showing how men, without fail, overestimate their abilities, competence, intelligence (and conversely, how women without fail, unless afflicted with a personality disorder such as narcissistic or antisocial PDs, underestimate their intelligence and abilities). So it follows that they are also deluded about their thinking style. Mistaking selfishness and stubbornness for free-thinking is just one of many examples.
Anyhow, it was just a reminder that while Canada is more level-headed as a country than many, including the US, there are still men there and they are just as stupid and arrogant as they are anywhere else in the world.
***[I guess I’ll put this little side note here. We are still in a place where no one is entirely certain of the entire host of behaviours that can lead to you becoming infected with The Virus. I am a supporter of scientific methodology, and I stand by science as a tool, even when men misuse it. Some women see male abuse of science as a sign of a bad tool, but that is not true. Men abuse ALL tools. Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater, or something like that. I think generally, wearing a mask in enclosed spaces around other people is a probably a good thing, as is washing your hands PROPERLY and regularly, and not putting your tongue down other people’s throats… So not following these basic protocols, is just kind of stupid and selfish – not free-thinking. We don’t have all pieces of the puzzle yet, but we’ll get there. Part of the problem is that some behaviours are required, but so many other behaviours that may be problematic are unregulated, so many people start to question authority and refuse to do anything.]***
But let’s get a little more local, and more to the topic of this post.
In my particular city, it has become mandatory to wear face masks on public buses, and there is limited seating. But there are people who are exempt from the mask thing. The transit authority has a blurb on their website outlining who doesn’t have to comply. It is very bizarre. Some of the people on the list include:
- Children under 5. Why don’t parents have to mask their toddlers? Kids tend to be disease super-spreaders as they touch everything and don’t tend to self-regulate coughing or where their drool or snot goes. I suppose this a breeder privilege thing…
- The mentally challenged. I don’t understand this one either. If a mentally retarded person can manage something so complex as riding a bus, then they can certainly figure out how to put a mask on.
- People with limited mobility. I’ve seen evidence of the first two on the bus, but I think most people who can’t really move either take a parabus option or just don’t travel by bus. If you can’t manage a mask, then taking a bus would be extraordinarily difficult.
- Emergency personnel responding to emergencies. Self-explanatory and hard to imagine – the bus isn’t typical transport for say, a paramedic on the job.
Now there is one other group of people who seem to be covered by the exemption, but they are not included in the list of the super-challenged. And in fact, I’ve seen more of these offenders than any others on the legit list. Wait for it… you know what I’m going to say!
Yeah, I’ve noticed an inordinate number of men – of any and all races – getting on the bus without a mask. Every time I ride the bus, there is at least one adult male without a mask. And these guys are mobile, not under 5, not emergency personnel, and not overtly retarded. And yet they saunter on and sit their in their scrotal privilege unmasked, while the rest of the Canadians use the only uncovered part of their faces to full effect, shooting them dirty looks (Canadians are super good at passive aggression!) And remember, like children, men tend to be super-spreaders of disease (which has been true throughout time).
Now, also in the transit regulations is a note that while mandatory, the mask rule is not enforceable. In other words, the bus drivers have not been tasked with getting into altercations with angry males who refuse to comply – because we all know that’s what would happen if you tried to encroach upon a free-thinking male’s sense of FREEDOM. I agree that bus drivers should not be put in more danger than they might already be in, having to deal with the large number of behaviourally unpredictable drug addicts we have here on the West Coast, but what is the point of a mandatory rule if it only applies to a minority of the population…?
First, welcome to the douchebags from rationalwiki. Ladies, you know your feminist blog has made it when internet scrotal warriors with their self-proclaimed ‘rational minds’ (sorry, let me pause to laugh my ass off here, man-logic is anything but rational, but fuelled by emotional mantrums) have listed you as a ‘webshite’ and angry, privileged followers click on over to your site to become angrier. I’m sure between watching rape porn and eating the meals their mothers provide, they are raging online about how women have destroyed the world with their quest for human rights and not to be raped or to take the scourge of rape porn away. Nothing says ‘rational’ like not understanding the difference between rights and privilege. I won’t go on. Women will understand. Men never will (they don’t have to in this world). Only rational people will get it.
Anyhoo. I’m in the middle of escaping a violent male in a rental situation while unemployed (I talked about insecure housing for women in my last post). Luckily, but sadly, one of the other women in my house has been experiencing related terrorism and we finally ran into each other and shared our experience. We had thought we were alone and thus unable to be believed (he said, she said, he wins, she flees… or dies). The third woman in the house is straight, very male-identified, and will never get on board. She is one of those who is internet dating, currently has a male who is trying to access her twat, gets angry when she says no, and she is still hanging out with him and making excuses for him. You know this common, sad, but tedious, story. She will likely be raped in the near future, and she is in complete denial. There isn’t a straight woman on the planet who hasn’t experienced something along these lines, but most will never admit it because women are still expected to let men rape them and accept it as love and affection. And the excuses they make to have it all make sense… But long story short, the other woman and I have found places to live, and we teamed up and forced the landlord to let us out of our rental agreement. Seldom do women team up – as I’ve mentioned before, this is one reason we haven’t made much progress as a class in fighting our oppressors (see posts on the need for Old Girls Clubs in the professional sphere, female bonding in general, how intersectionality has destroyed the long lost feminist prime directive, and more). Nothing will happen to our abuser, and while we are lucky to escape, it is another example of women having to escape a space that should, by definition, be safe in order to survive. Women often have to leave secure housing and even jobs and school positions because of the threats of violence and actual violence that men pose and enact, while the men stay firmly and securely in place, untouchable, housing secure and careers skyrocketing without the competition that more competent women would normally present, and most important, without the fears that women live with daily at home, in public and in the workplace. I always wonder to myself how many women are destroyed professionally, economically and more because men threaten them. I’ve written a little about this before, and posit the need for danger pay for women in the workforce.
So we get to my topic. Academia. Now, interestingly, but unsurprisingly, educated women are some of the most hated women among feminists (partially addressed in my post on Isolating Women). You’d think that women would embrace and promote women moving into fields that could actually help the world and empower women. But no. I’ve read tons of posts and articles by or about academic women, and the sad comments sections that accompany them, where so-called feminists viciously attack academic feminists and women in general. Complicated stuff going on there. The attacks often fall along the lines of “this bitch has made it; why isn’t she doing more to help less fortunate women? Why is she capitulating?” And and think to myself, “why the fuck don’t you go attack some men? Yannow, the actual problems.” These self-proclaimed feminists have no idea what it takes to make it in academia as a woman. I’m tired of blue collar bullshit. And liberal bullshit. I’ve lived in multiple worlds – I class myself as ‘educated poor’ – and instead of hating other work classes, I suggest embracing women and fighting the men who keep archaic systems in place. It’s simple, logically, but you have to let go of lady-hate to do it… Anyhow, the women they are attacking are likely 10 times as competent as the men they share departments with, are paid less, are less likely to be promoted, are often forced into non-career-advancing busy work like planning parties, and taking on advising roles that would never be forced on men; are often sexually harassed, threatened and so on; and they are usually completely isolated from normal professional goings-on (especially with female colleagues), unless they support the male party line. To put forth a strong feminist agenda, even in a ‘Gender’ Studies department (the name change says it all – welcome to women’s non-rights in the 21st century) will destroy your career. I watched it happen in my own department in the US when I was a grad student. A committed single (sort of asexual, although not labelled) female professor, top of her field, prominent in the media, well-published and cited, yet treated like shit in our department dared to complain about sexual bias. She ended up blacklisted from academia and had to go to the private sector. Meanwhile, the male professor who would play with his crotch while lesbian grad students met with him in his office, and who threw away a week of lectures in our hardcore stats class because he couldn’t figure out what he was doing, is a full professor now. Untouchable. Further, all the non-white male lecturers got tenure; none of the females did while I was a grad student there. Well, one black woman – no white women nor the one aboriginal woman was promoted. Myself, I had the highest teaching rating of all the grad students. I was in line to receive a prestigious teaching award, but the female prof on the awards committee told me that they were going to give it to an Asian male with lower ratings. She said, “he needed it”. And I didn’t? Why did he need it more than me? He didn’t end up in a teaching career. I did. I needed that award. He is making 6 figures. I am unemployed. And I seldom earn above minimum wage, and that’s when people aren’t trying to force me into volunteer work or work-stay exchange situations (which are more likely to be forced on white women than anyone else, since we are all supposed to be the supported playthings of rich white males with time on our hands, right?)
But this was the 1990’s. Surely things have changed, right? Millennials and Gen Z’s I meet keep telling me that women are EQUAL now. They don’t face misogyny in universities, of course! Could it be? Have things changed radically?
Well, I spent a year in the American college system as a student during this past year, and no, things are not equal. Not in the slightest. Almost all the full professorships are still held by men. Women are taken on board on a casual lecturer basis, most often. I looked up the salaries at the public colleges I attended. One of my male teachers was making over $130,000 per year. He showed films all the time, frequently cancelled class, and I remember we had a quiz in class one day, and he announced gleefully, “Nap time!” Working hard, earning his pay! I had two stellar female teachers, highly committed to students, put in extra work, stayed after class, etc. My favourite, had a listed salary of $19,000 despite extensive expertise in her field. Never once yelled “Nap time!” for herself when we had tests. The other was teaching a double load at the College and University because she couldn’t get hired as full-time staff and had to make ends meet.
Canada is no better. No way. I’m currently exploring a possible PhD program as my two Masters degrees have been the worst professional decisions for my career possible, besides deciding to work in China. I would never recommend a terminal Masters to any woman unless she is already in a job that requires it for her to advance. As it is, I’m too educated for lower level jobs (I’m a risk because I’ll leave once I see something better!), but I’m not educated enough for the jobs I’m intellectually capable of. I also have a weird resume – my education doesn’t match my vast, but colourful, job experience, so that is seen as a risk too. (why aren’t I specialized or in management???) So I’m looking at PhDs as a possible option in these turbulent times. I’ve found a perfect program in Canada, and I’ve explored the faculty members thoroughly. Now as we all know, the current political climate is focused on forced diversity. What does that mean? Well, it means ensuring that non-white people populate the higher echelons, even if it doesn’t accurately reflect the local community. And this agenda has been successful all over North America. This department I’m looking at is mostly non-white, despite being located in a province that is over 90% white (try forcing diversity in any non-Western country and see how that works…).
Now what is blatant, but will never be addressed, is that there are no female core faculty members. I think there are one or two adjunct female lecturers. And it’s not a Physics department where you would expect that kind of misogyny. So I’m thinking to myself – what has been solved here? Why are Millennials and Gen Z’s so fucking deluded? This department is operating in a mainly white community where over half the population is female (the latter being normal in all corners of the world, of course). And they’ve populated their departments with foreign, non-white males, although white males are also present as they always are. And there is a huge immigration drive here. I agree with having foreign faculty in all countries – definitely! you need international expertise to boost your research agenda and perspectives – but I also believe you need to solve your problems at home first. And the problem that needs to be addressed EVERYWHERE IN THE WORLD is this: woman are not represented. And it’s not for lack of intelligence, experience or education. Most of our undergraduate students are female. The majority of grad students are female in a growing number of departments. But conversely, in most departments, all or almost all of the tenured faculty are male (of multiple races). And no, the problem is not that women are just starting to get PhDs in 2020. Try decades of increasing numbers of female PhD graduates. So, something else is going on that keeps women out of jobs fitting their education and that pays them for the 8-12 years of post-secondary education they sweated through while living at poverty levels. Where is the drive to allow women into the halls of intellect, of power? How can we effect change when female students don’t see a place for themselves in academic institutions? Let’s stop taking tuition money from women and girls while not allowing them a chance to find economic freedom and influence in policy, research, and the realm of discovery. Everyone is happy to take our money, but we are still denied power. Education is, first and foremost, a tool, not a hobby for women.
Part of the problem in many Western countries with predominantly white populations is that in the drive for racial diversity, white women have been lumped in with white males. And established white workers are almost always male. White female jobs are ‘last in, first cut’. And if those jobs open up, white women are not usually considered ‘diversity hires’ even though they are vastly underrepresented and always have been. See, men only share with us when they are trying to shove some of the responsibility for problems (i.e., racism) onto someone else or to find a scapegoat to blame or punish. White women have never had a kick at the can of power. We have fought harder than most women to achieve rights, but are not actually benefiting our own selves from this hard work despite what non-white women say. We are still underrepresented in all areas of power, including academia, even when we are a majority in the local population. Yet we are told over and over that our ‘white privilege’, which actually is ‘white male privilege’, is unjust. Politically, in the West, it has gone this way: white men have dominated forever. They still dominate, but are slowly on the way out. (And they fucking hate it!) Diversity is the buzzword of the day. So the bottom line is: if a job is going to be a special population hire, white women, who are underprivileged, are ‘white’ and thus left out. We’ve never had our time and never will, in other words.
So is it worth it for me to even try? I’m already an undesirable because I’m middle aged. Second most invisible time in a woman’s life except old age. And men have hurt my career prospects so many times. I’ve been pinched, talked down to/mansplained to, micromanaged (among other psychological techniques used to push women out), sexually harassed, forced into lady-busy-work, passed over for awards and promotions and recognition, given heavier workloads than male counterparts, and threatened by colleagues and bosses and advisors. I’ve often had to leave. Fear. Frustration. Stagnation. Men don’t experience this, can’t understand this, and downplay or dismiss it as crazy talk if you even bother to explain. I don’t get the sense that anything has changed for the better for my demographic, even though I’m told over and over that women, in general, are equal now, and that white women, specifically, have all the power. Where is this actually reflected? I don’t see it. And trust me, I am looking hard.
When you write about feminist (and I really mean female separatist) issues, you know you are writing about truth, the subjective truths of individual women and the objective truth that is living as a woman in a male-dominated society. Sometimes, you are writing about things that happened to you or other women in the past. Sometimes, you are writing about current events. Sometimes, you are writing about theories, fantasies, and things that could be possible or are definitely not possible in the world as it exists.
When you are out in the real world, you have a mask on. You can’t really talk about what you write or experience or observe. You’ll be gaslit by all men, and the vast majority of straight women. You’ll be verbally and maybe physically attacked. You’ll lose opportunities for jobs, social connections and other things you need to survive. You are a ‘dangerous’ woman, despite how vulnerable you feel. It is possible to be dangerous and vulnerable at the same time. But here’s the thing, the danger you pose is not a real danger like the danger that all men pose to women and girls. It is a perceived danger, and only ideological at that. When you question the status quo – that males run the show and women and girls exist in a state of subservience and suffering at the whim of males – or if you present data that confirm that the status quo is what you say it is, you threaten the male power base. Danger to males means not being able to walk the planet able to do whatever they please with impunity. It is not the same as how females understand danger – bodily harm, sexual threats, isolation, poverty, starvation, death – although males try to equate them or even elevate their idea of danger in importance.
If you’re lucky, you can wear the mask in public and then come home to a place where the mask comes off and you can be yourself and live in relative safety. If you are straight and have chosen to live with a male, you may still wear the mask at home, but I’m tired of people talking about straight women, and the privilege they orbit, and how it can go wrong. If you choose to swim with sharks and you get bit, why are you surprised, ffs??? I mean, we have been bombarded by d.v. data for decades, and women still choose to ignore it. Complicated issue and reasons for ignoring reality, but not going to be addressed here. No, I’m talking about the brave women who reject cock, are punished for it on many levels, are forced to wear a second mask in public because they are deemed even more dangerous than an outspoken straight woman, and then because of poverty, are forced to wear the mask at home because of lack of choice in living situations.
There is little worse than being a poor lesbian or asexual who tries to stay away from men, but is forced to share living space with male strangers because she can’t afford anything else. I’m talking living in hostels, living in houses with multiple rooms rented out (where the renters are chosen by a landlord who doesn’t live in the house, not the renters who have to share the space), living in women’s shelters or prisons where violent male trannies posing as women are allowed in. In these cases, the women must wear multiple masks in public and then wear at least one at ‘home’. To take the mask off in a space where you are supposed to be safe also shows you to be dangerous, and then your ‘threat’ becomes exposed to the straight women and men living with you. Your housing becomes further insecure since you have become a perceived threat, especially if you complain, and you sense that your very life may be in danger because one thing is true: unlike women, when men get scared and threatened, they turn to violence and lash out. They target the perceived source of their fear – a woman who doesn’t literally or figuratively suck their cock or any cock, for that matter; a woman who doesn’t pay them enough attention, attention that they deserve as males; a woman who is a lesbian; it could be anything as no one needs a reason to attack a woman – and they try to take back the power they think they deserve and that they think has been taken away from them (aka ’emasculation’).
I firmly believe that financial independence is crucial for all women so that they may have safety and choices in life, and to help eliminate forced heterosexuality. Women are only dangerous because men say we are, and as we all know, in the he said/she said game, what he says goes. Always.
I promise, like seriously, that I’ll seriously write a more serious post soon. In case I haven’t mentioned before, I recently repatriated to Canada – only because my visa ran out in the US and you can’t really fly anywhere else from the US due to American incompetence in dealing with The Virus. Anyhow, Canada has an effective, but weird (I’ll have to explain that in another place at another time), Virus Strategy. Keeping Americans and their fucking fucked version of freeeeeedom OUT has been a big part of that strategy. And it has worked.
So I find myself in a 2-week forced quarantine situation that all incoming people must do, although for the vast majority, they are residents and have a place to go that is deemed appropriate by the government. I don’t. Communicating with my government earlier, they told me that for someone in my situation (non-resident citizen with no family, home, friends, place to go, etc), they would house me in an appropriate place and supply me with food – paid for cuz this is a socialist country and all that – all to prevent me from potentially spreading the Chinese-American Virus to sweet little innocent Canadians. I arrived and lo and behold I am now in a designated location, but I get to pay for everything! Yeah! The Canadian government lies. But I knew that years ago and is why I try so hard not to live here. Anyhoo…
I’m on Day 11. No outdoors. No sunlight. No contact with people. No walking, except to the bathroom (significant considering I’ve walked 5-10 miles every day for the last 4 months). Very restricted diet due to expense and access. I’m actually doing pretty well, psychologically, except for getting distracted on the Net and finding unfunny things perfectly hilarious.
So I figure I’d share my favourite video so far. Let’s go back to the 1970’s – probably the most embarrassing decade in the last century. I’m proud to say I was born in and disco’ed my way through it with home-made terrycloth leisure ensembles, velour knickers (not the underwear, Brits – the half-pants you’d see on the likes of Little Lord Fauntleroy, yessirree), strange-patterned sundresses, and a bunch of other embarrassing outfits crafted at home out of financial necessity. Yeah, white girl not rich – must be an anomaly…
So enjoy the following sexist song performed by Caribbean band, Boney M: Rasputin. I love busting stereotypes, and this helps us see that not all black people have dance moves. I couldn’t stop laughing – they’re worse than me! Note that Bobby Farrell takes himself waaaay too seriously, like all dudes. One of the women also has those dead eyes that I associate with rape victims and porn ‘stars’. Hope that wasn’t what was going on here. And the outfits… cringe. Very ’70s. And the lyrics! Good lord. Note that the song was banned by the Soviet govt, but Russians still loved the band.
Enjoy! Ra ra Rasputin… lover of the Russian Queen.
I’ve never really understood why people get so obsessed with actors. They are basically glorified memorizers, some of whom are able to sell a lie. We worship this? Okay.
Well, once in a while, there might be someone with real talent; they are seldom recognized as a) we celebrate all male mediocrity, so the most famous male actors aren’t really that talented, b) women are chosen for their looks rather than acting ability, so most female talent never makes it to the big screen, c) most writers are male with a few male-identified women thrown in, so the roles for women are limited and usually supporting roles and/or caricatures. Female talent seldom gets to shine, even if they have been noticed.
But one thing is true, no matter the talent or lack of talent in the acting department; these folks aren’t really special in any other way. So why do their opinions on serious issues matter so much to the hoi polloi? I mean, most of them aren’t especially intelligent or worldly. Even if they’ve managed a university degree, intellectual work, thinking, analysis, etc., wasn’t the primary goal. Jobs geared towards fame and fortune tend to attract people who want attention, so the narcissism factor tends to run high. So I ask again, why would we place such value on the opinions of self-centred, out-of-touch, I lie-for-pay types? Does everyone really need a hero, and the loudest asshole wins the role?
Again and again, we follow the uninformed political rantings of ridiculous screenies, and not to beat a dead horse, but the latest is the schlock coming out of the mouths of wand-wavers, Daniel Radcliffe and his cohort. [Jeez, I told myself I would never write on this, but the topic just won’t go away…] Please stop talking. Please stop attacking the woman who made you rich and famous. You aren’t even touched by the trannie issue. Women are. Let women who are on the ground dealing with this shit day to day take the lead and put the issue in its place (the toilet). Your opinion means less than nothing. Go back to your mediocre acting. I, for one, am boycotting all future films put out by tossers like this one.
So tired of the trannie issue, but it is far from being done, and the worst is yet to come for women who dare to trust established science and defy the crazies by speaking in public.
No, despite my reference to lady-brain, this isn’t a sarcastic or satirical post, nor is it a trans bullshit post. I’m actually going to give you my top three online fun-times picks for those of you who are in a situation where you are not allowed to work (like me, a foreigner in the US trapped on a student visa), can’t work (you are on disability or have The Virus, or something), have free time (these days, who doesn’t?), or are a lazy fucker (i.e., a man or a man trapped in a woman’s body or vice versa wtf…, or a modern cell-phone-is-attached-to-my-hand-stay-at-home-facebook-mom).
I love puzzles and strategy and solving problems (jeez, maybe I am a trans…), and believe that doing this kind of stuff regularly can maintain and even improve brain function well into old age. Luckily, if you sift through all the porn and cat videos, and narcissistic Gen Y and Z videos on the internet, you can find a few sites to help get your lady-brain a-revving. I like crossword puzzles and sudoku, but I’ve included three sites here that you might not have thought of and definitely need to try.
Here are my faves, and the best part is that they are free to use. You’re going to need a laptop or desktop computer though because they are visual activities, perfect for visual people (and I don’t mean the male definition of visual person):
Jigsaw puzzles! All kinds of sizes and themes, from under 300 pieces to up to 3000. Guess which ones I prefer…? As much as I love real live jigsaws, this is perfect for the minimalist, the frequent traveller, and/or the space deprived.
A picture logic extravaganza. Japanese in origin, these puzzles are solved by reasoning out the placement of black squares (in black-and-white puzzles) or different coloured cubes (in colour versions) on a grid to create a picture. Numbers indicate groupings of like colours. If you like logic and pretty pics, you’ll like this game a lot. Note that on this site, men exist. Therefore, you occasionally run across a puzzle that ends up being something pornographic or demeaning to women. Usually, ‘kind’ scrotals will put the R-rated or over-18 symbol on the puzzle so you can avoid it. I always make sure to down-rate the puzzle and leave comments because it is my civic duty to leave perfect feminist turds on everything men ‘create’ to hurt us.
When I found this site, I became addicted and lost many, many evenings to my computer. If you like geography, attention to detail, and using the most minute of clues to solve problems, you will get lost as you find the answer, too. Basically, you are given a shot of a place and you have to figure out where it is. You have the option of searching particular cities or regions, or you can search the world (that is the option I usually choose). It could be rural, urban, a roadway – anything. You can rotate 360 degrees and zoom (google street view type of sitch), and you have to rely upon visual clues such as languages on signs, license plate information, intuition and knowledge about plant life, the colour of the dirt, how things are organized, and so much more, in order to narrow down your focus. In the end, you guess the location, and then you find out how far off you are. It is pleasingly challenging.
Anyhow, have a go. Improve your brains while having fun.
This post is part of a few series. Find it among the following:
I’ve been to a few Prides here and there in various cities. I’ve gone even though I’m not so much into large group events, and even though I attend without knowing anyone since I move around a lot. I go for a few reasons. First, I like to check out the local scene. I find it extremely hard to meet lesbians, especially lesbians who are man-hating, pro-women, non-intersectional, and anti-natal. (Do they even exist???) And second, Pride is supposed to be a celebration of something that on any other day gets you hated and mistrusted by women and pornified by men. Pride came about to allow a seriously oppressed population the chance to feel normal of sorts among others who understood them and the daily challenges of not following the hetero rules of raping and impregnating bitches or being that raped and impregnated bitch. Gay men, of course, have always turned Pride into a bit of a sex-fest. That is what men do regardless of which holes they fuck; everything is sex to them. Lesbians: I think they just wanted to be acknowledged, accepted and then left to their own devices. Kind of a ‘we exist, thank you, now fuck off and stop raping us and demonizing us’ sort of thing.
I volunteered for Pride in the American city where I was living last year, but this time, it was a sort of Bizarro, alterego of Superman kind of Pride – very ass-backwards compared to the Prides I had attended long ago. For one, Pride is no longer peaceful. The gay men are still loud and proud and focused on sex, as per usual. But then again, the shit that has been happening lately is happening to women, not men. Gay men have the privilege and luxury of being able to focus on their own brand of fun as there is no threat posed to them. Their space remains intact and their bodies unassaulted. But for lesbians, there is an element of violence and aggression, and within-group policing and hovering threats that never existed before. I felt afraid sitting in my volunteer orientation. I was more afraid of the people in the Pride group than I was of potential violent nutjobs from the crowd. And I’ll tell you why.
Enter the trans. The cause of the violence and aggression and general feeling of unease.
I couldn’t even figure out whether there were any actual lesbians in my volunteer group. The word ‘lesbian’ wasn’t uttered a single time during my multi-hour orientation. But 30 minutes on pronouns and another 30 on triggering and another 60 boiling down to how, basically, it is not possible to have a comfortable conversation anymore, even with people you are supposed to be bonding with because they share your experience. There is nothing shared anymore (except perhaps for fear on the parts of lesbians). The sense of erasure and danger and WTF is going on? was heavy and knife-cuttable-throughable. All due to trans. So the peaceful factor was gone completely. Erase women and you erase any chance for logic and peace… Besides the trans, lesbians have further been erased and replaced by Generation Z(ombie) Queer Hitler-Youth types, ready to narc on anyone who doesn’t suck lady cock or admits they are just a plain old lesbian, or shhhhhh, they have a vagina.
But I digress. I’d like to talk more about my experience with my most recent American Pride, but that is for another post.
I want to talk about trans2, one of the worst things to happen to America since… Larry Flint?… the incel movement took hold? … I don’t know. It’s hard to pick one horrible event as life as a woman is basically “Okay, what next, you fucking rapists?” But it gets worse. Imagine that the trans mindset melded with the BLM (Black Lives Matter – or what it really is: BDM – Black Dicks Matter) mindset, the latter also being one of the worst things to happen to America since MLK approved the rape of a parishioner or prominent Black Panthers member and convicted rapist, Eldridge Cleaver, designed his male supremacist ‘Virility Pants’. (I’ve written about Black Dicks Matter before.)
When you put trans and BLM’ers together you get a fucking insane group of lady-cock, race supremacist, history revisionist, white woman-raping, assholes. In many ways, they are worse than the plain old ex-military white trannies with their muscles and bad wigs. BLT’s are self-made uber-victims and are loving it. Like all trans today, they are transing dead gay men and non-conforming women and otherwise rewriting history. They are claiming that they started the Stonewall riots. In reality, the riots were incited by a LESBIAN, an XX, a WOMAN, half-white/half-black, Stormé DeLarverie, who had been assaulted by police. Now the black trannie dudes will not only ignore this well-corroborated fact, and insist that black trannies (i.e., men) incited and led the entire riot scene. They have taken GAY black MALE, Malcolm Michaels and turned him into a transwoman. Malcolm was at the riots, but didn’t start them. He also knew he was a MAN and GAY and a DRAG QUEEN. But he is dead, and dead men can’t argue or clear up lies and other bullshit. The trans have done this with numerous gender non-conformers throughout history to bolster their numbers. It is dishonest and dilusional.
Now, I’m going to say one more thing about the so-called feminists who don’t support the trans takeover, but who have no problem with men of colour dominating all women. I have noticed in a lot of chat spaces that the urge to shit on white people is irresistible, and the common theme is that a) white males are responsible for the trans horrors, b) white males make fucking ugly ‘chicks’, whereas all the non-white trannnies seem to be so beautiful and elegant. And I have to put my foot down and say “stop and open you gd eyes.” It’s as bad as the trans making up stuff to fit their narrative. White people are not responsible for every bad thing in the world. Sorry. You want it to be true, but it’s not. Second, there are tons of ugly non-white trannies. Go online and do a search in your favourite search engine with the keywords ‘black trans’, and you will see some of the butt-ugliest dudes in dresses that you will ever see. And they don’t ‘pass’. They are so very clearly male, it’s not funny. And for the truly brave and those who have a high tolerance for yuck, take your safe search off, and do an image search for ‘ugly black trannies’. Then you get tons of porn shots of some of the butt-ugliest dudes with their dresses OFF that you will ever see. Put your ‘must fight racism against the poor, poor oppressed menz!’ and pickme urges in the freezer for a while. Reality is uncomfortable at first, but is a much less mindfuckable place to be in the long-run. And you are less likely to hurt women, too! Added bonus of accepting reality!
In short, this is a loud, violent, delusional group of males who benefit from two of the most powerful and supported man-centred faux-victim groups in the US. Don’t get sucked into supporting anti-woman policy because you are brainwashed into believing you’re evil because of your skin colour. You will never win. They are male and they will try to kill you eventually, physically or through policy. Unlike with white males, these guys will double-whammie you with “You’re racist AND transphobic!!” and there is nothing you will be able to do to assert your humanity as a woman (and you’ll be double screwed if you’re a white woman).
I know if I read the title I’ve assigned to this post, alarm bells would go off. Rape. I’d be waiting for the rape story. I am a lone woman and rape has never been far from my mind since I was a teenager and was alone in most of what I did from day to day. I learned from an early age what it meant to be a female that did most things in her life alone – sometimes by choice, sometimes, not. Tracy Chapman, one of my absolute favourite folk singers, unfortunately grouped us girls into ‘good girls’ – those who moved around quickly in groups – and ‘fast girls’ – those of us who walk alone and who got raped and beaten and disappeared by men and boys. There is almost the implication that the latter are looking for trouble, and deserve what they get. I kind of hated her for that. I’m neither fast nor bad, and I certainly neither look for trouble nor do I deserve all the rapes and assaults by men of all races I’ve experienced as a lone woman and especially as a white woman. I love you, Tracy, but fuck you.
[Brief rant, get ready, or get out now while you can;)]
Many of you are likely partnered and you have no idea what it is like to have to do every fucking thing in your life alone. It’s not always a choice to be alone, but neither do I want to have to call someone every time I want or need to leave the house, ffs. [I was told endlessly in China after being stalked for weeks and threatened with rape by a black man on my university campus, that I should never leave my apartment by myself. Not possible, even if I wanted to, which I didn’t because I wasn’t the criminal.] The non-alone don’t know what it is like to have to plan every single thing you do around what could possibly happen to you because you are alone. If you travel, you are likely travelling with a male master, or children, or other family members, or maybe a friend or friends. Mothers bitch constantly about the struggles of being a mother, but they are so fucking protected by their brats. They have no idea #!$@ If a rapist or thief or kidnapper is going to target a woman, who is he going to pick – the bitch with the litter of pups with her or the lone female? Which will be easier to deal with? Men are opportunists, picking off the ones no one will miss. Breeders don’t know real danger even though they think they do or they wax poetic about how ‘dangerous’ things are for them. They’ve chosen to be mastered, to fit into society, to get the economic, legal and social tit squeeze and ass pat that society and their family gives them for spreading their legs, so the only real danger they experience is from the master they enslave themselves to. There is a lot of coat-tail privilege one gets when signing on for motherhood and/or hetero slavery. I say coat-tail because no woman is truly privileged. I stand by that. But you become privilege adjacent simply by orbiting a man or using your cunt the way it was ordained by males. When you are alone – whether it is because you know you aren’t mentally healthy enough to have a lesbian partnership thanks to years of mom-abuse and the subsequent distrust you have for women you make yourself vulnerable to, or whether you just never met someone you could envision partnering with, or whether you just don’t believe in the male-designed concept of long-term monogamous entrapment – you have a very different experience of the world. Despite what heteros and especially breeders say, lone women don’t have it easier. The so-called freedom comes at a massive price. You are economically much less well off than the average breeder and hetero enslaved. Jeez, I was looking at the median family incomes that idiot American liberals published a week or two ago to try to show how whites and blacks are different economically, and I was drooling at the median black income. I’ve never even come close – and I have 3.5 university degrees. Being white and female and not attached to a male always has meant fewer opportunities and less pay and more expectations that I’ll do volunteer work or work for free – I think the assumption is that all white women have husbands and don’t need to work (um, 1950’s much…?) therefore you don’t need to take them seriously in the job market. I probably have gotten pushed or guilted into working for free more than any non-white woman or any male, for that matter. (I just was told again recently that I should find some unpaid work. Why do I have to work for free but everyone else deserves a pay cheque???) Further, for some reason – probably the same one I just mentioned, I am always harassed for money by a segment of the population (all non-white men, and even some non-white women) that has more earning potential than me, even with less education. So being alone and a lez and white and a woman sucks the big one economically. And you are always a target for men and boys physically and sexually. Even indoors. Even in your own home or what passes for one. But outdoors??? It is always there.
Rant finished. Thanks for persevering.
So “A Lone Woman in the Woods”. For me, it smacks of a rape story, but today, no. This is a story of positivity, the beauty of simplicity, the power of a lone woman and the collective power of women through the ages – power that has been stolen by men – that that lies waiting in all of us still if we wish to harness it once again.
Today, I hiked a redwood and eucalyptus forest that lies a mile from where I am staying temporarily. I am Canadian and although I detest my country on so many levels, there is something essentially Canadian that lies in me that is tapped when I go to forests. Most of us don’t live near the ocean even though so much of our land is bordered by ocean. The greatest percentage of our population is lake- and river-situated. And we are tree people too. The forests define us. The ocean is mildly interesting, but inspires a healthy fear in me. It is a river or lake and the forests that typically go with them that speak to me on a primal Canadian and human and womanly level. Some of my relatives are freshwater (Great Lakes) fisherfolk, and I myself have spent much quality time travelling by canoe, camping in untouched forest land, and fishing. So entering this beautiful forest today was pure bliss. The thought of men and rape and intimidation and violence, as usual, entered my mind and settled in at the back, on the edges. But I allowed the smells and colours and textures and the history of women and my people take over.
Women have always been stewards of the forest, and nature in general, in the past. [Sorry, aboriginal North American peoples don’t have the corner market on nature stewardship, as much as modern Canadians and Americans are brainwashed to believe. Women from all cultures have always had a healthy respect for nature until men overruled them and ‘civilized’ them.] Before men stole medicine from my foremothers and banned them from knowledge, branding them witches and devil worshippers, imprisoning them, torturing them, tearing their female parts off or apart, killing them, and destroying or erasing years of wisdom, they were the Wise Women. The healers, the midwives, the abortionist-saviours, the repositories of forest wisdom, the herb and mushroom collectors, the pain relievers. Men became suspicious, then felt threatened, and finally said NO. Women are not allowed to have the independence of body and mind that exists separate from male control and that is deeply rooted in nature, the forests and water bodies. Men decided the forests were not to be cherished and guarded, but exploited – much as women’s bodies were exploited. Men brought death to the forest as they brought death to women through rape and endless pregnancy and ignorance and house-bound slavery. They cut the trees down. They burned down forests to deprive enemies of their bounty. They used women’s bodies and forests to fuel endless wars. To no end. Completely useless and pointless.
Much of that body of medical knowledge has been lost to Western women. Some groups of women were luckier. The knowledge they collected lived on in Traditional Chinese Medicine, for example. But the Wise Women of western countries were decimated and replaced by the male need to cut and bleed and dissect and drug, and although their modern ‘medicine’ lives on today, it creates more illness than it cures. Older cultures sneer at Western Medicine, but it is male medicine. Our ancient wisdom – our female wisdom was mostly erased. I’d bet that we did a lot of things better.
This lost history impressed upon me as I hiked unmolested through the forest. I breathed in the scent of trees and sun and wildflowers. I only ran across two people – both women – and I wondered if they felt the collective female history in the background. Probably not. Heterosexuality beats sensitivity out of you, in my experience. But I will be going to that forest every day for the next 10 days that I will be in this area.
Jane Siberry, one of my favourite Canadian singers, was the background music for my journey today. I’ve had the privilege to hear her sing three times in small venues in Vancouver back in the day. Two of her songs have been featured in the beautiful all-woman death-ritual scenes on the L-Word (Anytime) and Six Feet Under (Calling All Angels – thanks for the reminder, Radfemspiraling). The song I heard today in my mind and heart was Bound by the Beauty. It is such an essentially Canadian song and a song of woman-joy. And the nature-bonding is an aspect of Canadianism that I can get on board with. Enjoy the lyrics and videos (clear studio/audio version and a live version that is less clear) at the bottom.
I’m bound by the fire
I’m bound by the beauty
I’m bound by desire
I’m bound by the duty
I’m coming back in 500 years
And the first thing I’m gonna do
When I get back here
Is to see these things I love
And they’d better be here, better be here
Better be here
And first I’m going to find a forest
And stand there in the trees
And kiss the fragrant forest floor
And lie down in the leaves
And listen to the birds sing
The sweetest sound you’ll hear
And everything the dappled
Everything the birds
Everything the earthiness
Everything the verdant, the verdant, the verdant
The verdant dream
Karen Carpenter. A literal Karen rather than what was talked about in the post referred to above, but hey.
So I’m marching around, enjoying relatively perv-ball-free streets, and into my ears flows the following, which I hadn’t listened to in years and years.
What do you get when you fall in love?
A guy with a pin to burst your bubble
That’s what you get for all your trouble.
I’ll never fall in love again.
I’ll never fall in love again.
What do you get when you kiss a guy?
You get enough germs to catch pneumonia.
After you do, he’ll never phone you.
I’ll never fall in love again.
I’ll never fall in love again.
You get enough tears to fill an ocean
That’s what you get for your devotion.
I’ll never fall in love again.
I’ll never fall in love again.
Sorry, the video is really just an audio version.
Well, I laughed and laughed right after the part about catching diseases from men. I wrote something to that effect recently. Now, this song was written by Burt Bacharach and Hal David, and being male, they originally wrote the lyrics with the sexes reversed. Poor hurt men – as if men can fall in love, right? And of course, women are the source of disease – like how they’ve always blamed prostitutes for venereal diseases. Anyhow, the song was made famous by Dionne Warwick, and she reversed the sexes – probably more out of not wanting to appear lesbian than fighting the power. And honestly, it makes more sense and rings truer when a woman sings it. Men don’t really love or cry over women, unless they are crying because their slave is gone, and they don’t want to go to the effort of procuring another.
Just because I felt like it, I decided to write a few of my own lyrics for the more modern survivor of male love and attention. I took the fall in love lines out to conserve space, but you know they’re there.
What do you get when you fall in love?
Stockholm Syndrome with a side of shame
That’s how it works in the hetero game
What do you get when you fuck a dude?
Chlamydia, AIDS, or a yeast infection
Knocked up, and finally, his rejection
What do you get when you deny the trans?
Death threats, rape threats, no-platforming
Loss of your space unless you confirm him
Feel free to come up with your own and then you can dance and sing along.
Let’s get back to Karen Carpenter. She was a superstar, but undervalued. Unfortunately more famous for her death from anorexia (what some racist, sexist black women have called ‘white girl disease’, even though it is very common among many Asian girls and women, as well) than for her amazing musical talent. What a lot of people don’t know, is that she was a kickass drummer – better than most of the famous male drummers out there. She was forced by the producing powers in her life NOT to drum, and to focus more on the lady-like singing. Women have always been cut out of most aspects of music due to the unseemly nature of playing an instrument that might require body movements or facial contortions.
Her joy was in drumming, however.
I include below, this incredible video of her in her element. You see joy in her that you don’t see when she sings. And it boggles my mind how her clearly decimated body is able to put so much power into communion with the several drum sets on stage. Please try hard to disregard the creepy, douchey brother presence. He can play the piano well, but there is something odd about him that I don’t want to examine too deeply.
Just an intro
Sorry so silent. There is so much to write. And this is the perfect time for writing. There is nothing to do, and I’m trapped in a true shithole: America. Luckily, not New York – I feel bad for those fuckers. Truly. That shit storm could have been prevented. And it is getting worse. And it is entirely possible, given the true lack of leadership, brain power, and coordination between states, that the US is going to see even harder times during what was fast becoming a serious problem due to income disparity, housing shortages, climate change problems, and a low point for women. Perhaps my new series on the American Downfall, which had been brewing in my mind for a while was aptly timed.
But let’s get into some particulars. I want to take a look at three very special narcissistic psychopaths who have more power than anyone deserves and who run completely unopposed in a way that matters.
China – President Xi Jinping
Luckily/unluckily, I have a shit ton of experience with the Chinese, how they think about things, how they operate, and how they destroy people from the inside out. I lived there in a surreal hell cumulatively for nearly a decade – a hell where you constantly feel like you are fucked no matter what you do or what you say. They are masters of psychological punishment and retribution, and experts on ‘spin’. As I have mentioned before, I had a Chinese leader at a college I worked and lived at look me in the eye and say with a straight face that they locked us in our building at night for our own safety.
Throughout history, the Chinese government has perpetrated numerous crimes against humanity – often unhidden crimes spun as ‘for your own good’ measures – and haven’t ever once taken responsibility for a single one, even when the hard cold truth is laid out before them. A thousand years of foot-binding is never talked about – it is suppressed women’s history, after all. Who cares? They also don’t teach their children that China bought and owned African slaves for hundreds of years. My students often like to talk about Americans like they are evil for their history of slavery, but the fact is that black flesh was bought and sold by Arabs and Asians long before even white Europeans and later, American men, got in on the action. And speaking of criticizing Americans, please note that while the US is good at incarcerating people, the Chinese are best at incarcerating and killing people. China kills more prisoners per year than all the other countries of the world combined. They don’t talk about it, though. Suppressed information. It is impressive, this ongoing cover-up of history and facts, but you definitely want to admire it from outside their sphere of influence.
It is not possible, however, to live outside their latest influence because the sphere is the entire globe – the COVID-19 pandemic. They may not have deliberately created this situation, but they certainly facilitated it. And they are squarely in denial mode, and are still spreading lies throughout their population that the virus didn’t start in China. I have several former students checking in with me on Chinese social media to smugly inform me that a) the virus actually started in Italy or the US (or whatever the rumour of the day spread by the state-owned media is over there), and b) China is superior at containing the virus. What they don’t say to me is that China has been superior at exporting the virus. And they have also been superior (as they have been for years) at hiding information, failing to report data, and intimidating and punishing people who have tried to expose the truth or criticize the government (which are seen as the same thing over there). Like everywhere, there are good, honest people in China, but they don’t survive well under an oppressive regime.
Looking at China’s recent history, what is happening now is nothing new. The previous president, Hu Jintao, was a typical Chinese leader now famous for suppressing information about SARS for over a month, holding the doctor who leaked the information to the world in prison for 45 days. Luckily, SARS only spread to 26 countries. I lived in Taiwan, a hotspot, at that time – 2003. And I was continuously told that the US had concocted the virus and deliberately infected China with it. Same Chinese tactics – blame someone else, refuse all responsibility.
Xi Jinping has followed suit, but he is a hell of a lot worse than President Hu. Admired by the populace as a president “working to stamp out corruption”, he has ended up implementing measures to reduce government accountability and transparency (not that the Chinese government was ever either of the two), and ensure more corruption. Xi named himself lifelong
dear leader recently, and showers his cronies with rewards. He is possibly just as powerful as former notorious Chinese dictator, Mao Zedong. Xi has managed to wage a war on Canada due to the Huawei debacle, even killing an incarcerated and already sentenced Canadian, as revenge for Canada arresting the multi-millionaire Huawei CFO and keeping her under house arrest in Vancouver (she has a few million-dollar homes in my country). As a professional bully, Xi has also forced several international airlines to stop saying that Taiwan is a country. American Airlines, Delta and United, Lufthansa and numerous other airlines have kneeled to suck Chinese dick. Pathetic. In the last little while, he has imprisoned over a million Chinese muslims in concentration camps – sorry ‘reeducation facilities’ – Islam is seen as a mental health problem (I think all religion is a mental health problem, but incarceration or conversion can’t fix that problem…). Xi has cracked down even further on free speech, especially on the internet. He employs millions of people to police the internet and thousands are arrested every year for saying the wrong thing. The online presence of a gay and lesbian group at a university where I was living was recently shut down, students were interrogated. And now he has become the man responsible of the spread of the Coronavirus to, let me check… 180 countries (as of today, April 1st – and that’s no joke). Note to President Xi: you can cover up rape and murder in your country, but you can’t hide an epidemic, no matter how many scientists you arrest.
Classic Chinese thinking (Ministry of Foreign Affairs spokesperson, Geng Shuang)
“China didn’t start it. China is not responsible for it either.”
Oh, and by the way, speaking of Chinese power and free speech suppression, we have: the Spanish flu, German measles, Middle Eastern Respiratory Syndrome (MERS), and more, but we can’t call COVID-19 the Chinese flu or Wuhan flu, despite the fact that China, and specifically Wuhan, is the origin of this disease. Stop coddling the psychopaths. It reminds me of Saturday Night Live – long-running American comedy show notorious for making fun of almost anyone and everything. I grew up watching it. I have noticed that President Xi is the only major political leader who is off-limits, and China is never joked about. As I’ve been predicting for years now, China has begun its empire, and the US is on the way out.
USA – President Donald Trump
And Trump is helping the US on its bizarre downward spiral. Only in the US, a country that claims to uphold freedom like no other country in history or in the modern world, can someone like Trump be freely elected. Only in the US, a country with the power to impeach leaders, can someone like Trump remain in office. This is a stupid man. An ignorant man. A man who doesn’t understand much, let alone science. A man who cares more about Twitter and his television presence than actual politics and the people he has been elected to protect and serve. A man who was recorded making rape comments about women and who has been accused of raping, attempting to rape and sexually assaulting numerous times since 1989. His rape comments have been recorded and made public and still he remains. Women have been surprisingly complacent about what this man stands for. Knitting fucking hats for fuck sake. Instead of demanding the recall of this human excrement. You poor brainwashed women. You’ve allowed men to shut you up, derail you, and make you believe you are free when in fact you are no better off than women in other woman-hating countries/cultures.
Rapey Trump quotes:
“I moved on her like a bitch.”
“Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything.”
To me, that is his worst quality, and I think he should be put to death because of rape – like any and all men in the world. But if his deep-seated misogyny doesn’t move you, there is plenty of other shit to make you question his ability to lead effectively.
The man is stupid. I was flying within the US a few years ago, and an elderly American couple that was sitting beside me asked me what I though of Trump. Now, being a Canadian, I am pretty polite and mild-mannered, and I gave some non-answer meant to keep me unassaulted. I am so used to dealing with crazies and I am so used to being verbally (and sexually and physically) attacked for being a lone white woman (WWWW – walking while a white woman), that I just try not to rock the boat (or plane) unless I know I can escape. Long story short, the couple ended up being anti-Trump, and I finished our Trump discussion with an analysis that I though the man saw what he was doing as some sort of game. He is used to being on television where nothing is real and everything is drama. And I really think he extends this little fantasy life into the real world. The presidency is just one more game to him. But he is also stupid. I can’t say this enough times. Seriously.
I am not sure why he is allowed to speak in public. His own party is starting to distance themselves (see this article, from The Atlantic, written by a Republican). And following every statement that he makes, it seems like member of his entourage needs to go back and do damage control, placating the enraged, correcting erroneous ‘facts’, and dialing back fantastical promises and predictions. I mean, history is riddled with insane and/or stupid MEN with too much power doing and saying stuff and people having to clean up after them. And often these types of leaders, if left unchecked, can spell the downfall of a society.
If you want a clear sign that the US is falling, this is it. I would argue that two terms of Bush Junior was the writing on the wall – I mean seriously, he was dumb and aggressive and offensive and did huge damage to the reputation of the US, but Americans wanted him not once, but fucking TWICE. [Does everyone remember that hilarious, but significant, televised press conference where that Iraqi journalist threw a shoe at Bush’s head??? If that doesn’t say dunzo for America, I don’t know what would…] The acceptance of Trump doesn’t surprise me one bit, and the complacency exhibited by ignorant Americans is just a death rattle in my ears. Americans, I’m embarrassed for you, but you made your bed.
Now, getting to the virus. Trump has made the mistake of turning this virus into a blame game with Xi. They are both narcissistic psychopaths with testoterone poisoning. Xi began the coronavirus pandemic when he suppressed vital information about what was going on and thus releasing the virus out into the world at large. He is 100% responsible for that, but Trump has devastated America by behaving ignorantly, ignoring medical professionals, putting on his “We’re number one!” dumb American act (this virus can’t touch us, we’re so fucking powerful routine), and failing to take necessary precautions. So now, at this writing, the US is the most infected country in the world with nearly 204,000 cases. And it will get much worse. And Trump is fully to blame for this. My own country, despite sharing the longest border in the world, is weathering things well. We paid attention to past epidemics, we are responding intelligently and promptly. I just hope that American ignorance doesn’t destroy us too and that Trudeau doesn’t decide to suck Trump’s dick. Myself, I am stuck here in the US. I can’t go home, and if I could, I don’t know if I would at this point. Travelling ups your chances for infection, and I’d hate to import and infect my fellow countrywomen. I’ll write a different post on the shitty treatment a legal foreigner faces in the US at this time…
Honestly, now that I’m back in the US, I don’t see a lot of differences between the Chinese and Americans. They share so many qualities. The leaders do too. Both places are terrible for women. Both places perpetuate ignorance, but as I’ll write about in another post, I really feel that Americans celebrate ignorance on a whole different level in comparison to the Chinese or anyone else on the planet, for that matter. Ignorance is entertainment and it is accepted. Chinese just pass the buck, or the RMB, I should say. It’s an excuse machine.
“It’s going to disappear. One day, it’s like a miracle, it will disappear”
Russia – President Vladimir Putin
Where the fuck is Putin? And what is actually going on in Russia? Now, I’m going to admit that I don’t have much experience at all with Russians, and I have never lived in, let alone been to Russia. So I can’t speak to the Russian mind or way of doing things. They do have that same bizarre, bastardized, communist mentality that you see in other places like China. But Putin has put out a different image than Xi. But I included him here because he is a major player, and he is a narcissistic psychopath like Xi and Trump, regardless of his politics.
So, what is going on in Russia? Does anyone know? If you go by the little that Putin has said, he is behaving like a typical communist leader. Everything is rah-rah-rah. The government is fucking amazing. Everyone and everything is fine. Black out bad news that paints the government in a bad light or that might force the leader to take responsibility for their actions. If I look at my trusty Coronavirus map, there are only 2,777 cases in Russia. This seems odd in a country that borders 14 other countries, including China and with populated areas close to virus-overrun Europe. They also have 144 million people. How can they have so few cases? One explanation is that this is how communist regimes work. Cover up the truth, etc. But Russia also has a crappy health care system, and word is starting to get out that things are much worse than reported. One of the major problems with Russia’s data suppression moves is that Russian travel has not been restricted. They aren’t seen as a risk zone, they haven’t been quarantined or put on flight ban lists. And the result is that the general feeling among the population is that Putin is a hero and the virus will sidestep Russia because of it.
The common Russian view:
“I don’t believe in coronavirus.”
Now, it just came out yesterday that a doctor who just tested positive for the virus met with Putin unprotected. They shook hands. Moscow has been put on lockdown for a week (actually a week-long paid vacation), and the government has implemented a ID system similar to that described to me by my former students in China. They will have to register and show ID if they want to go out to procure food. But unfortunately, much of Russia is either doing business as usual or only has partial lockdown. Let’s see what happens.
Andrei Kolesnikov, political analyst, Moscow:
“It’s a clear message that we are better equipped due to our political system. [Putin] is sure that he is more efficient and this is a case to demonstrate his superiority in that sense.”
Can we fuck off with the politics and just work together to solve the problem?
No, a resounding no. This is how men work. May the best psychopath win!
Stay safe and smart, ladies. And stay away from men if you can. They are always filthy germ-carriers, no matter the disease. We know this from personal observation and from published research. As an example, among educated people in the workplace, “only 31% of men and 65% of women washed their hands” after going to the toilet. If you are going to catch the C-virus, it will likely be a man infecting you. What’s new?
It’s a page not a post, so find it here or in the side bar. All articles falling under this discussion of the demise of the American empire can be found on this page.
As I mentioned in an earlier post, I am no longer in China. All of the options I’d been researching seemed better than China, each with their own challenges. I chose to apply for a student visa to go the US, commit to a year studying something I felt passionate about, and most important, get my mental and physical health back. China broke me down.
Well, it hasn’t really worked out like I had hoped. My savings has been cut nearly in half in less than a year. I have contracted a scary super bacterium, the likes of which I had only gaped at via online images in the whatthefuckisthat!? category. I think I would have been safer in China with the Coronavirus, tbh. I’m not joking. And sadly, I’ve encountered some of the nastiest and most aggressive women I’ve ever met in my life. I may not stay here after this semester ends. It has been a true nightmare. And I don’t recognize this country anymore – a country where I went to grad school 20-some-odd years ago. I’m left saying what the fuck is going on here? I feel like I’m living in a ‘shithole country’ that many Americans like to refer to when they talk about Third World countries or countries where women are treated like cattle (pot-kettle-black?) And can only conclude that it is part of the natural decline of a prolific and violent patriarchal empire.
So back to the topic I had in mind. I feel like this country has taken some steps backwards, especially with regard to women. It was poignantly expressed yesterday morning as I arrived at my campus. Black history month was last month – there were posters of MLK and messages posted everywhere to raise awareness. March – now – is women’s history month, and…..? Cue the crickets. Nothing. No posters. No acknowledgement. No empowerment. No history. I had expected it, but even when you’re ready for disappointment, it still bites.
But what does this mean, the failure to acknowledge women in America directly following a month-long fanfare for blacks? Neither liberals nor conservatives will support women, but for different reasons. Liberals want to congratulate themselves for being human-rightsy, but don’t want to take real power away from men. Supporting women would threaten the male power base. Conservatives are often pro-whatever-their-race-is, but will still support men of other races over women. It is this way in every corner of the world, but we’re talking about the US. So what might be some of the reasons for the no-comment on women’s history?
Liberals would likely say that women have achieved freedom and equality, unlike the poor black folks (men). I mean, women can vote and besides they are able to be prostitutes and sluts and pole dancers and shit. They have freedom now, dammit. Trying to call attention to themselves, especially right after black month, would be offensive and arrogant and would steal thunder. Make a big to-do out of nothing as bitches are wont to do. Why can’t they just accept that women have all the power?????
Liberals might also say that use of the word ‘woman’ is trans-exclusionary. Somehow, stating a fact (XX = human female) negates the existence of men in lipstick and stilettos who feel like totally puss-perfect and ready to do Woman correctly, nay, better! Putting up those celebratory posters might make 68.1% of trans try to kill themselves. And it would be all women’s fault! It is better to erase women and women’s history in order to keep the trans from throwing a typical male hissy fit at not having the spotlight. My campus is so pro-trans that I am partially surprised that they didn’t put up women’s history posters focusing on trans history… I suppose doing nothing is better than a trans take-over? Both are forms of erasure. Can’t win here…
Conservatives? Do they celebrate women? Not really – unless said women are really good at supporting their man. Powerful women are those who can scrub a skid-mark out of a pair of boxers or quell the family’s whining with a well-baked pie. So putting up posters at an institute of higher learning kinda goes against what they believe in. Education at least opens the door for female freedom. While many women do pursue the education, sadly enough, few walk through that door.
A few historical points about the US track record with women that most like to gloss over, make excuses about, just plain old don’t know, in favour of whatever the political climate is:
- The first slaves brought to the US were white women from Europe: wife-slaves, unmarried female children to be sold as wives, and female ‘criminals’ who were to be sold into marriage or prostitution. Europeans also rounded up girls (‘street urchins’) living on the streets to send over as rape fodder. This model has applied to all colonies in the history of the world. Women and girls are always the first and last slaves.
- Women were not included as people in the Constitution or Bill of Rights. Women have been trying for a federal Equal Rights Amendment to the Constitution for decades. It is 2020 now, and nearly 100 years after women first drafted the amendment, there *might* finally be the 3/4 of the 50 states needed to officially add said amendment. It is being debated. People will fight it. It may be years until women are protected humans on paper. I’ve noted that white women as a class are the only US citizens not protected in any way under the Constitution. There are official racial protections, gay protections, religious protections, and of course, white men wrote the whole g.d. thing for themselves, so they are protected. But white women have been left out. White privilege applies to men, and a woman of colour can always fight her oppression on the basis of racism. Hopefully, the trans will not sabotage things for women and the federal ERA will go through.
- Black men got the right to vote in 1870. No woman was allowed to vote until 1920. There have been barriers to voting for both groups, but black men were accepted as adult humans well before ALL women.
- There has been a black male president, who despite being less experienced and qualified, was accepted more than once over an experienced and qualified white woman (or any woman, for that matter). Neither candidate was perfect, but enough already. I don’t really believe that the presidential office attracts the right kind of person, given how corrupt the system has become. I just don’t see a woman as President in the near future. When there finally is one, she will suffer and be sabotaged, and be held up as ‘the reason we don’t want women as presidents’.
In conclusion, I believe that all groups except women are fully supported for a few reasons. First, men are part of all oppressed groups, except the group known as female humans. I’ve written about this before to explain why hate speech against women isn’t called hate speech. Secondly, and equally important, a history of oppression is only acknowledged when the group in question is no longer enslaved. Women are the only group in the world, including and especially in the US, that embraces established female slavery institutions and welcomes new forms of female slavery. To talk about women’s history is to acknowledge that women were and still are oppressed – unless you seriously alter the facts; unfortunately, much of women’s true history has been erased as it is.
Anyhow, happy women’s history month, and welcome to my series on the American downward spiral.
Gearing up for something longer and intense. But I absolutely must send out radical e-appreciation for a fellow blogger and sister, kaguyamouse. In my prolonged absence from my site, I’ve only just discovered you despite you having been here. Thank you for your writings, which I enjoy immensely. I get you, I feel the isolation, and I know well the feeling of being a stranger in a land that shouldn’t be strange, but that so frequently is. Our common, comfortable land and small tribe are currently online in these spaces we populate through writing, as long as they are allowed to be there.
Well, my goodness, I haven’t written in a year-and-a-half. That was not intended, but it has been a stressful and odd, but ultimately productive time since the summer of 2018. I became busy self-empowering and exploring and working through a lot of China-rage. And as I may have alluded to or come right out and said in past posts, I was actively seeking to get my ass out of mainland China. And by gum, I did it!
China was becoming a scarier and scarier place over time. As a Canadian, I began fearing for my life – I was even threatened by a Chinese male colleague at the college where I was working part time. Google the Huawei debacle if you’re interested and find out how the US put Canadians in danger. It’s great being a chess piece on an international game board used by psychotic capitalist dictator (Trump) on the one side and psychotic communo-capitalist dictator (Xi) on the other. Long story short, China began arresting Canadians right left and centre, and even more scarily, revisited an already sentenced and jailed Canadian and changed his sentence to execution in retaliation. Americans were oblivious, as usual, but my Canadian friends were sending me regular messages urging me to get the hell out of China. That’s not why I left, but the timing was appropriate. And now that China has developed another nasty virus to export, I’m even happier that I’m not there. Hopefully, that will be contained. We’ve just seen the first international death (in the Philippines) from the Chinese coronavirus.
I’m in the US, currently, but I may, in my next post, discuss why it really is not the place I fell for many years ago. Especially as a woman. But I’m getting off-track here. Forgive me, it has been a while.
I wanted to discuss something that has been on my mind plenty in the past, and now again, since I’ve been back in the US amid whiny black, white and other non-white men. And that is this thing called ’emasculation’. It is a word that inspires an immediate and instinctive chuckle in me, for a few reasons. First, in the literal sense, I love thinking about men losing their dicks. Personally, I think all baby boys should have their dicks removed at birth. The Jewish had half a good idea – they didn’t go far enough. It wouldn’t harm males at all, and it would solve so many of our current problems. Messes in the bathroom on the annoying end of the scale of male problem-causing, and rape on the most serious end of male scourgedom. Men seem to be so much more obsessed with anal sex anyways, so it would be a favour to them to refocus their attention on their butts instead of their dicks. So yeah, literal emasculation sends thrill chills up and down my spine.
But when men talk about emasculation, most of the time, they are talking about having their
rights as men privilege taken away. By women – that is the important part. It’s pretty much just over-emotional over-sensitivity – something most feminists call ‘butt hurtness’. But the scary part is that this feeling – and remember it is only a feeling, and an irrational one at that – fuels a lot of the violence and hate that men have for and enact on women. Boiled down, man believes he owns the world (and women) and is owed respect by all women. Pretty much anything can ’cause’ a man to feel emasculated. All you have to do is just stand there as a woman and if a man feels that you have dissed him in some way, you have emasculated him. But really, it is any word, behaviour, look on your face, thing you’re wearing that can be irrationally understood by men as being an attack on him as a man. I think it is connected to his ‘intuition‘.
A man really has to subscribe to the religion known as gender to feel emasculated. And that means he believes intrinsically (even if he says the opposite publicly) that men are superior to women in all ways that matter. He also has to believe that there is a different set of standards for women to adhere to, and which includes, serving men. The standards would be degrading for men to have to follow, but they are perfectly acceptable to force on women. Again, he may not publicly admit he believes this, or may not be intelligent enough to even articulate it to himself. But the fundamental belief in the inferiority of women drives the whole irrational over-sensitivity machine that men seem to constantly experience.
So let’s turn this around. Is there an equivalent to emasculation for women? Short answer here is a resounding ‘no’. The gender religion negates this possibility. Let’s explore why this is so. [I did write a post on the close link between infantilization and feminization, which is related, but not exactly what I’m talking about here.] There are actually women who get pissy if you take away their ‘woman essence’ as it is dictated by men and embraced by female hetero sheep, but it isn’t an equivalent. I’ll give some examples below.
So for men, a feeling of emasculation means that he believes his right to intimidate women, have economic, sexual, political, legal (insert anything else here) power over women has been taken away. Example: a woman earns more than her husband, therefore she is emasculating him (his economic power as a man over her as a woman is taken away). He is justified in getting angry and blaming her for his irrational feelings, and if he wants to beat the shit out of her, well, can you blame him????
There isn’t actually a word for this phenomenon for women. That should tell you everything you need to know. Degradation – and that is what this feeling or state is all about – is ACCEPTABLE and normal for women. Women don’t have power. Women don’t have privilege. So they aren’t there for you to take away and women can’t feel like they have lost something. Only a member of the master class can create these feelings in themselves because they have all the power and they know it on some level. And most women don’t believe they are superior either – that is key. If you aren’t factually superior, and you don’t believe you are superior (even if you can’t articulate your feeling of superiority, even to yourself), then you can’t feel like something has been taken away.
Now, let’s come back to those women who truly subscribe to the gender religion. There are women who feel like their societally-contrived gender role is being taken away – usually, it is a response to ‘feminists’ who are actively fighting against gender roles and the forced inferiority of women by men and their henchwomen. For example, these are the women who get angry when people call them the more humanizing and equalizing ‘Ms.’ instead of ‘Mrs.’ because marriage is supposed to be some kind of achievement (instead of an institution firmly rooted in female slavery). They are also the women who get angry or disgusted when women wear pants suits instead of irrationally showing up at work exposing their legs in skirts (why is it only important for women to expose their bodies in the workplace…??? Can you imaging a man showing up to a business meeting in assless chaps?) And there are millions of examples of this weird pissiness at opposition to forced femininity. Gender role adherents will feel like their ‘womanhood’ is being attacked. Their right to be weak and helpless and feminine and exploited, as if that is the very definition of what a woman is according to a god or Nature (which, of course, it isn’t – purely MANmade). And encountering these types of women is confusing, frustrating, and ultimately sad and harmful to women as a group. And of course, this symptom of Stockholm Syndrome isn’t a true equivalent to men’s irrational feeling of emasculation. The only thing natural about it is that it is a normal and non-threatening response of the colonized mind to rationalize harm by male power. Otherwise, women would have to fight men for their freedom to leave gender in the dust. That can get women killed, beaten, raped, etc. Easier to nod and smile, wear the flipping pink skirt suit, and attack one’s fellow slaves regularly.
I like geography and all things related. Contrary to misogynistic stereotypes, I am a chick with a good sense of direction and I love maps. I do sometimes get a bit lost, but I figure things out pretty quickly. It is not my experience that males know where they are going or are handy with a map. My most hilarious experience with this occurred in Hong Kong several years ago. I was doing a visa run from mainland China with a group of people who, like me, had never been there before. We got off the metro and had to find the Chinese consulate using a rudimentary public map posted on the wall. Myself? I got my bearings immediately and worked out the most efficient route in my mind, using visual-spatial skills that girls aren’t supposed to have. Now unfortunately, in our group, there was a tall, masculine, loudmouth, ex-military British fucker, whom I’ll call Prince George. And being be-penised, he immediately appointed himself leader and started telling us all his plan to get us to the embassy. I realized immediately that Prince George hadn’t a clue about how to get to where we needed to go. I piped up and said that he was incorrect, and people should follow me instead. But I was ignored, being female and all. And I hadn’t done military service, so obviously, I was missing some kind of navigating skills. So I said, “See ya,” and left the group unencumbered by dude-funk. Can you guess what happened? Yep, the group got lost under the leadership of the humble Prince, and I sat outside the embassy waiting for them for an annoyingly long time.
Moral of the story: Never follow a man or trust what he says about his abilities or knowledge. First, in his over-confidence and general self-delusion, he always knows less than he lets on and a woman will always have to fix whatever problem he creates. And second, males have little consideration for safety and other practical issues only a woman will think about.
I digress slightly. This is actually a post about geography and problems with dudes.
So in my love of geography and learning, I find myself taking little geography quizzes online. I made it my mission to know all of the 196 countries of the world and where they are located (I include Taiwan in this total, having lived there for a few years and having discovered how much it pisses the Chinese off when you tell them they don’t own Taiwan…). Recently, I found myself taking a country factoid quiz and was faced with the following question:
What is the only country with over 90% male citizenship?
I hesitated for a second, as my mind briefly flashed to one of those gun-toting American survivalist groups declaring an independent state. But then I realized they like rape too much, so there is no way they’d shack up officially with so many dudes. So, it had to be gay dudes or religious dudes. Or both!
Yes, that was it. Vatican City, the citizen (not resident) count of which is somewhere under 600. Under 6% of these citizens are female.
Now, personally, I don’t care if men want to form their own male-only countries provided there are serious protections in place against human (i.e., female) trafficking. I’m perfectly fine with separatism as a concept in practice. Male violence can be confined to its own petri dish, and women can be left out of it altogether. And if the dudes can tap into their natural gay selves (all dudes are omnisexual and thus can choose to be gay), all the better for women!
So, Vatican City is the closest thing to what I’m talking about, and their set-up works for them. I argue that it only works as well as it does because it is not completely male. There are a number of non-citizen females who support the city-state both as non-resident workers and as resident ‘support’ of resident males. Further, Vatican City is a highly respected independent state, greatly funded by the larger Christian world population. As well, nobody attacks them – even Muslim terrorists, despite their chest-beating – because any attackers would essentially be waging war on the entire Western world. Also, no one questions their uber-sexist, backwards, religious worldview. They are essentially allowed to function unmolested in hypocrisy and idiocy without a homegrown army (note: the relatively small contingent of super-faggily-dressed Swiss Guard Pope-protectors (see above) would be no match for a modern military assault), and draws in major tourist dollars from a peaceful, but brainwashed, crowd of Christian sheep.
So here is my question: why can’t women create their own internationally recognized and respected women-only, non-religious ‘Vatican City’? Why don’t women WANT this?
The answer is actually quite simple. Despite the fact that women-only city-states make a great deal of sense, even if women demanded them, they would not be allowed to exist. And to be honest, I think there are actually a number of women who would go for this kind of set-up if it were a possibility. But a female Vatican City would be under constant attack by men. Why? Well, all-women communities tend to be high-functioning and non-hierarchical. While girls are taught to believe from birth that they cannot exist without men, the opposite is actually true. Women function better when no men are present. And when men are faced with the reality that they are unnecessary or obsolete, they not only can’t handle it intellectually, but they feel they must retaliate with violence and try to put a stop to female success and independence. A classic, small-scale case of this actually exists in Kenya in the village of Umoja, which was founded nearly 30 years ago by women and girls fleeing from the male violence inevitable under forced heterosexuality, and has persisted despite several different kinds of attacks by men facing their own inadequacy.
In the West, women have not been so lucky. We are at a point where even women-only events and static non-living spaces have not only come under attack, but have been infiltrated and even erased by men, backed by changed laws and hard core violence. It is not unreasonable to say that Western women have as little freedom today as do women in many countries that are supposedly more ‘backward’ or less ‘progressive’. But when you tell Western women they are so privileged and free, they tend not to stand up for themselves and instead feel guilt at how lucky they are… Anyhow, no matter where you are in the world, it is hard to imagine women successfully creating their own women-only permanent living and working community, nevermind a separate city-state or country, and remaining unviolated by men. Unlike the men of Vatican City, these women-only countries would not have the backing and respect of the world.
But wouldn’t it be fantastic? The idea of having an untainted, demarcated space (city) without a single male – even boy-children – demanding your attention and energy and hyper-vigilance. A country where you wouldn’t have to live in fear. Where you could walk alone, unafraid, at any hour of the day. Where you could sleep under the stars without worrying about getting raped or kidnapped. Where you don’t need locks on your doors. Where you don’t have to get married and agree to be raped for decades and decades by a single man in order to be ‘protected’ from being raped by all the others or to be economically secure enough to avoid having to become a hooker to feed yourself. Where female friendship actually means something and is reliable and stable. Where the concept of family is replaced by something less fragile and dangerous and more inclusive. Where women can finally find their natural selves…
[This post is part of the Year of the Fantasy series…]
I’ve spent all of my adult life trying to foster sisterhood through various means in different settings. Despite it being something I have always craved and needed, it has always been, continues to be, and likely will always be a Sisyphean endeavour.
I’ve come to realize that not only are all females around the world trained from birth to mistrust, hate and betray other females in order to receive crumbs of power and affection mingled with abuse from males, but the vast majority of women have no interest in changing this sad and unnatural dynamic.
The system is such that any woman who seeks to fight against it is more likely to be destroyed by other women than by the masters (men) themselves. Men design the system and pull the strings. The women do the dirty work, destroying one another through isolation and the subsequent stripping of power that can only come through the strength in numbers that a sisterhood would offer. It’s a slick move on the part of men. Despite being the puppet masters, most men see the cock proxy evil that women do to other women as evidence of female cruelty rather than brainwashing and fear of repercussions. All evil regimes have been run this way. Nazis, for example, put Jewish representatives in charge of the day-to-day abuse of fellow Jews in the ghettos and camps to avoid getting their hands dirty and create mistrust among members of the group itself. Under any such regime based on fear and violence, the victims then focus on the traitors within their own class, learn to mistrust one another, seek to betray one another in order to gain favour with and avoid punishment from the master class, and all the while, the true powers that be continue to reap the benefits, tsk-tsk’ing over the pettiness and ‘innate’ nastiness of the underclass or slave class. I mean seriously, how often have you heard men comment on the petty cruelty of how women treat each other? And they are correct in so far as it is the only way women can interact with each other ‘safely’ under Patriarchal rule.
So, how are women isolated from one another? How is sisterhood discouraged? How do women pick on one another in order to curry favour with their be-penised overlords? In a system built on sex-based discrimination, isolation is tied to female deviation from sex-oriented norms. The less you follow traditional sex role requirements, the more you are isolated from other women and the less power and voice you have. Thus, not using your vagina or uterus, or following the rules that
a god or nature men and men alone have laid out for us is grounds for dismissal and hate. Men already create isolation for women based on race, but of course, as we all know, race is a discrimination that arises solely from sexism and the male coveting and control of the pussy and uteri within one’s group and the punishment of men of other groups through the pussy and uteri that other group owns. It’s all about woman-hate and without it, there is no racism. Women bear the burden of racism and the blame for racism. Men of different races are more likely to bond over woman-hate than women of different races are to bond over rape and other woman-torture by men. Sisterhood across race is hard to achieve as a result. Thanks to patriarchal design.
But back to traditional pussy-use and the punishment of women who rebel by women who comprise the cowardly, brainwashed majority. And yes, there is no bravery in complying with what men want. Remember that. To chalk hating and destroying other women and engaging in pro-Patriarchy, anti-woman rituals and traditions up to ‘survival’ is bullshit and apologism at its worst. Call it what it really is: cowardice and ignorance through and through.
While ultimately, men are responsible for turning women into woman-haters, I do hold women responsible for what they do to others. Being abused is never an excuse for ‘paying it forward’ to people who don’t deserve your hate. I’d much rather see women attacking men than other women. But alas, that is not the situation.
Despite what you may think, there is no group of women more hated and isolated than the childless, especially the childless by choice. Non-breeding is the absolute worst crime a woman can commit in any society as it is a direct denial of the accepted definition of woman as Cunt-on-Legs and as Uterus. To refuse to use the vagina and uterus as traditionalists mandate is to somehow deny womanhood and scare the living shit out of men and the women who service them. The childless woman can be partially forgiven if she is physically unable to have children. Her crime is usually accompanied by constant pleas for forgiveness on the basis that she “wishes she could have children” and she “loves children so, so much”. But those women who choose not to breed for whatever reason? They are deemed deserving of unspeakable punishment on several levels, and this is true in all societies, all cultures and in every race. Her choice renders her not just sub-human, but non-human. Unnatural. Selfish. Demonic. Evil. Suspect. A destroyer of cultures and races. Someone who deprives men of their birthright. And an uppity bitch who denigrates the sacred, mystical, goddess-like status of motherhood. I can tell you from a lifetime of tedious, repetitive experience that the cruelty and dehumanization done to non-breeding women by breeding women is constant, even though breeding women often try to paint themselves as the ultimate victims. Breeding women have much more power and acceptance and social, legal and economic rewards than non-breeding women, even when they are horrible, neglectful and/or abusive mothers who became pregnant by accident, who hate children, or who had children because they want unconditional love from a powerless someone who can’t escape them (at least for a handful of years). I’ve experienced a lifetime of a parade of cast-iron pots calling a stainless steel kettle black.
Most non-breeders-by-choice also beg for forgiveness like the officially barren, but they also tend to have the mindset instilled in them through brainwashing from birth that they are selfish. I went through this myself. I used to apologize to breeders, if you can believe it, by telling them “I’m too selfish to be a mother.” I feel sick to my stomach when I remember these masochistic sessions where the breeder would look down her nose at me, and I would show my shame and embarrassment at my clear immaturity and general horribleness. I realize now that choosing not to breed is the opposite of selfish, especially because I am crystal clear on the many selfless reasons I have chosen not to breed. And further, life has been so much harder in so many ways that breeders cannot contemplate, and will make old age extraordinarily difficult. Data do show that single, childless, elderly women tend to be among the poorest and most in danger in any society. Men in the same predicament are almost always taken care of by some woman/women and are economically better off. Women either tend not to expect help (especially if they are brainwashed into believing they are selfish bitches) nor do they receive offers of help from men or women (especially if society believes they are selfish bitches). Men are always taken care of regardless of their choices in life or how much abuse they dish out and regardless of whether they ask for help or not.
Non-breeding women don’t benefit in the work world like breeding and non-breeding men do. They are still women, and are treated as such, but without the social, legal and economic rewards of motherhood and often marital status. They don’t get promotions or higher pay, even if they have more education or experience. They don’t get equivalent, paid time off, say, to take a class that breeding women get for maternity leave. I would love equivalent time off to benefit myself (not a vacation, but an academic sabbatical, say) in the way that breeding women do and have my job waiting for me when I get back. Data show that employers (especially female employers) don’t trust non-breeding women and don’t want to hire them as they are ‘unnatural’ in some way. I can’t count how many times I’ve shown up for a new, professional job only to be asked if I have children right from the start. No one asks me about my actual achievements, how hard I busted my ass for my stellar academic achievements, or my actual contributions to society. I’ve never received a pile of gifts or been thrown a party for any of my three university degrees or other real achievements or contributions to society. No, a woman’s vaginal ‘achievements’, even if they are ‘achieved’ when passed out drunk or done standing up in a bathroom stall, are the only important thing of note in the workplace and warrant gifts and congratulations from the workplace, family and society. My teenaged pregnant sister knocked up by a drug dealer managed to score years of government welfare as well as three high-yield baby showers. I never received a single gift for busting my ass during 10 years of university. My sister now owns a house in an expensive city, has four kids and a husband, and a sweet high-paying union job with a pension, and I make $12,000 per year, with no retirement or pension in sight… I will literally be working until I die, and that is not an exaggeration.
After answering the vagina question that I don’t have children, I am put into that “piece of shit” category. Non-breeding women are often given the harder and crappier jobs, and in some professions, the more dangerous jobs, as well as longer hours for the same pay as their lives are seen as valueless – no one is depending on them, therefore their lives are worth nothing. They are often expected to cover for breeding female workers when the latter take off to deal with child problems. The former don’t receive extra pay for doing extra work, and the latter don’t lose pay for skipping out for personal business.
To conclude, the very word ‘childless’ is itself discriminatory and isolating to women, as if not having a child means you are less, missing or lacking something. Child-free is a newly adopted term that women in this situation have reacted with. I’m not sure what the correct way of seeing it is. I’m not sure I care all that much. I just wish I were treated with as much respect as breeding women, and that these insecure and venomous people would realize that they live on the top of the shit heap where women are forced to live, but seem to accept.
Femininity and Attractiveness
When women eschew beauty rituals, they are punished. They are punished more by women than men. Honestly, despite what tabloids say, all women can score a man if they are not picky. Men will literally fuck anything. See this post if you don’t believe me. And weird fetishes are almost exclusively the domain of men. If you have something gross or weird or unappealing or embarrassing about you, there is a man or group of men out there who will get off on your issue and will fuck you silly. You do not have to be beautiful to get laid. There is no such status as ‘incel’ for women. Men talk loudly about perfect 10’s in order to keep women feeling insecure and distracted and diverting limited resources into stupid shit, but the reality is that as long as they are not expected to treat you as human or equal (and really, most women are willing to accept being treated as sub-human – that is how we are brainwashed), it really doesn’t matter what you look like.
So, if you are not complying with the perfect 10 femininity bullshit that men don’t actually care about, most of the punishment you will get will come from women who do comply. Even among feminists online, there are constant, insane and nasty wars between women who comply with femininity and who are ironically super insecure about their real appearance, and actual feminists who can’t believe so many women are still so brainwashed. The number of women who say they are feminists and that complying with brutal and degrading femininity rituals and submissive behaviour is a matter of ‘survival’ or (for fuck sake) an actual feminist act is saddening and maddening. These women, even feminists, will attack other women relentlessly for even questioning woman-hating behaviour. Honestly, men must laugh. Women spend so much energy punishing each other for things that in reality don’t matter that much to men. Despite what men might say, they’ll still make use your vagina even if you don’t shave your pudendum or your legs.
On a more serious note, women have made such an industry out of perpetuating femininity rituals, that little changes in places that matter, such as workplaces. If women could let go of this idiocy, women might actually move forward professionally with so much more mental energy to devote to their betterment than to stupid stuff that doesn’t matter to anyone. As a woman who doesn’t feminize, almost all of my punishment and abuse has come from women. I wrote a post on this type of situation here, where all of my female students criticized my appearance when asked for personal suggestions (note: I didn’t ask specifically for suggestions on my appearance). The male students, interestingly didn’t comment at all on my appearance, not that males are innocent. They have other things they do to degrade me and other women. Women just tend to be responsible for most of the petty punishments and criticisms and trying to force women to participate in their own slavery to men.
It’s hard to determine the order of worst lady-offences. The worst one is easy, as I mentioned. Not having children is the absolute worst crime a woman can commit. Lesbianism is Number 2 as long as it is paired with non-conformity to femininity. A lot of lesbians are still huge woman haters and adopt whore-face (perform femininity). Some try to call it ‘survival’, which is lame bullshit or a ‘feminist act’, which is dumb bullshit. Seriously? Wearing lipstick and heels is not a feminist act. It is slave behaviour that gets you head pats, and if you are a lesbian, performing femininity is an act of cowardice that serves only to let you ‘pass’. I’ve read feminine lesbians who criticize bisexuals for the same issues that apply to them. Bisexuality – a label I clung to for years before realizing a) I am not attracted to men, and b) it was ridiculous in an age where sexuality is political, despite the fact that it shouldn’t be an issue at all – lets women ‘pass’ in a society that rewards heterosexuality, and gets lesbians raped, beaten or killed. You can be a lezzer when you need lesbians to approve of you and then switch over when you’re in danger. Whether you agree or not (who cares…?), it’s the equivalent of a political flip-flop. Lesbians who feminize are essentially doing the same thing. Femininity performance is a political decision in a world that rewards cock-pleasing, and that shouldn’t be an issue at all. The only reason sexuality and femininity are even issues, and political ones at that, are because men exist and women’s status (which is always on the slave continuum) is tied to the forced belief that their very lives are dependent on how and whether they conform on these issues.
Some lesbians can’t hide, even if they put a dress on (think k.d. lang, for example). I absolutely don’t like the term ‘butch’ as it often goes with a version of woman-hate that requires the same feminine/masculine dichotomy that men demand, but I’ll use it here as people know what it refers to. Butch lesbians and lesbians who can’t hide their gayness under a layer of whore paint and silk are punished. They are punished by men, but they are also punished relentlessly by women who cowardly conform and who serve men. They are excluded from how women describe the range of womanhood expression. They are held in suspicion and women will assume something is wrong with them because they aren’t sporting pumps and push-up bras and making out with dudes. They are excluded from television and film, except when serving as a joke or predator (2-dimensional roles served up by men and woman-hating women who desperately want a job in a male-dominated field). Women fear and hate their own vaginas, in general, so to be faced with a woman who so clearly doesn’t have the same fears and hates must be terrifying. But overt lesbians also remind us that heterosexuality is not natural for women; they hold the mirror up, and we react with fear of what we are missing (peace, safety, love) when we erroneously choose men and a life of consensual rape and servitude. We react to being terrified by lashing out, as long as the target is deemed safe enough to attack. Women seldom attack the true threat (men) because men are more likely retaliate (beat, kill, rape) than women are. Lesbians are easy to attack and punish. (More on this in this post and this post.)
Yet again this week, I found myself forced to defend myself to an incredulous young Chinese woman that I am not married. I don’t even bother mentioning that I’m not attracted to men at all, as brain matter would be sprayed around the room and I’d be forced to clean that up. It is China, where gay people don’t officially exist, and I don’t want to lose my high paying job… (ha ha) or be arrested by the police, which is a possibility. Several times a year, I am forced to answer why I am not married nor have I ever been married. I would sincerely love to retaliate with “Why are you content to be a whore?” or “Why do you love to suck cock?” or “Have you negotiated a reasonable price for the lifetime sale of your cunt?”, but in public, I am a ‘nice’ person and I need to keep a few pleasant and helpful relationships, even if they are all based on me wearing a mask. Don’t we all wear masks in some settings…? I’d rather force myself to wear my ‘nice’ mask than wear whore-face, especially in a tropical climate! I save my straight talk for my blog, and that is enough. I don’t claim to be an activist. I don’t have the support for that, nor do I have a martyr complex or a desire to be physically hurt more than I have been in my life.
But seriously, I wish cowardly, fake-straight-bitches would stop asking me why I haven’t sold myself to a man. I am sick of women who are too afraid to be real with themselves, to ask themselves serious questions, and to fight against brainwashing. China is, of course, brainwashing central. All traditional, pseudo-religious countries are, but even in more progressive countries, very, very few people are willing to answer questions honestly. Even in the more aggressive West, very few people are willing to honestly answer the question: why do we say women need to be protected (one of the number one justifications for marriage)? Almost no one will say: MEN ARE THE PROBLEM, THE DANGER, THE CAUSE OF ALL WOMEN’S FEARS. Even in the West, marriage is seeing a resurgence, and strangely, the average age of marriage is lowering. Not sure what is going on there, but it is creepy and weird. It feels desperate. We are living in an age where people are more heavily masked than ever before, I feel, because of social media, the desire to be famous, and stay young forever. Completely constructed. Little feels real among the young these days. Will we ever face reality? If not, straight talk like the problem with marriage cannot happen, and those who fail to conform will pay the price.
Education and Intelligence
A former professor remarked to me a few years ago that as highly educated women, we were considerably more alone than the average woman. Now she has boy children and she is fake-straight (there is no such thing as a naturally straight woman, imo), and she conforms to femininity, so she really has no idea how far ‘alone’ can become for a woman. Try being non-straight, non-feminine, and a non-breeder!!! Anyhow, not only are highly educated women hard to find in work environments (unless you work in a professional, female-dominated field), but the few that are there seldom bond with one another. Frequently, they engage in nasty behaviour with one another in order to climb what ends up being a much shorter ladder with smaller pinnacles available than that provided to men of all races in the same environment. In the rare event that a woman holds power in a work environment, she is often ‘in good’ with male colleagues and is less likely to help or even be fair to female underlings. Unlike with men throughout time, including today, there is no such thing as a girls’ club where women help each other achieve regardless of merit. Further, women are more likely to hate and criticize female bosses and other powerful, intelligent, accomplished and educated women than they are male counterparts. Instead of supporting one another, they tend to ‘cunt out’ on each other (see my post on my redefinition of lady-slurs – I’d prefer the words not to exist, but I’d like to achieve what black men have achieved with the N-word).
I remember this nasty, rich, black bitch in grad school in the US. I’m Canadian, so in my early 20’s, I had little practical experience with American racial dynamics. I was nice to everyone, and found the frequent nasty treatment by educated, non-white women pretty fucked up. Anyhow, I’d say hi to everyone in the hallways, just as a typical, friendly Canadian usually does. And this rich bitch would look down her nose at me and say nothing. Then one day, she showed up in my office and demanded I help her out with her statistics – she was a clinical psychology student (perfect for the profession, eh?) and she hadn’t learned not to piss off the statistics majors as we were the go-to experts for all the other majors when they couldn’t figure out how to deal with their research data. I looked at her and told her I was too busy. I do wish I could go back and explain what she had done wrong, thus teaching her a crucial lesson – don’t fuck over other women, regardless of race; we fucking NEED each other – but I was too young in my feminism at the time to help women learn fundamental truths. I was still learning myself! I have made up for it since, don’t worry. Sadly, this chick moved on to the black guy in my lab and turned on the pussy charm. She faked sexual interest in him and OF COURSE he helped her. This is how women of the patriarchy work. She ditched him after he did her work for her. And he was likely bummed out that she didn’t put out as payment for his help. She got what she wanted and she never spoke to me again. Now that is a cunt move that I’m proud to say I have NEVER pulled. Even when I was still claiming bisexuality. I have never screwed over another woman whether of my own race/ethnicity or otherwise, and I have never sided with a dude to screw over a woman. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve created ‘Girls’ Clubs’ wherever I’ve studied or worked. I’ve organized women’s events. I write letters of reference for female students if they need them and pass on contacts and connections for jobs. I make every effort to foster confidence in young women. But I have also learned to spot bitches and cunts (if you didn’t go back to my link, that means a women who DELIBERATELY hurts other women – it has nothing to do with hurting men, unlike how men have defined the word), and I avoid them like the plague of patriarchal brainwashing that they are.
I think women hurt each other at all levels of education, work and intelligence, but the higher up you go, the more men you are forced to compete with. Most women see an advantage in cozying up to men to get ahead, and thus developing a sweet little case of Stockholm Syndrome, and the few females that are around tend not to have enough direct and individual power to further another woman’s career. The men who have the power often put women into direct social and professional competition with one another. And so women begin to see other women as either useless or a threat, and as a result, they fail to bond significantly, even though it would actually be to their benefit in several ways if they did so.
It is no wonder that women have such volatile relationships with each other. Isolation is a significant threat that all women live with. Step out of line, fail to follow patriarchy’s demands, and they suddenly find themselves ganged up on by the majority of women who are too weak, brainwashed and cowardly to fight or even question the system. [I’ve since written a post on friendship that will also help explain why women end up isolated from each other.]
I wouldn’t say that ignorance is bliss, but it certainly makes navigating a violent and threatening system much easier. Just put your faith in the overlords that rape you with your consent in return for protection from the overlords who might rape you without your consent. And punish your fellow slaves who might dare to rebel through various means of isolation. You must. You see, they can only threaten you if they are allowed to bond and then grow too great in number to keep your comfortable life of servitude peacefully unchallenged…
I’m in the middle of spending money I don’t have trying to change my shitty life. I’ve never really had the resources to change my life for the better, but I have depression and cPTSD from living in constant exposure to racism and sexism and the violence and threat that accompanies that. I see myself sinking, so I’m getting desperate, and I know, as a single, childless woman, things get much, much worse for me with each passing year. Further, I belong to a silenced segment of the population who has no voice when it comes to violence. Female, middle-aged, non-man-fucking, white, childless, and unfeminizing. In other words. I’m not human, and most of the world, sadly including liberal, white faux-feminists, wants me dead or disappeared or just plain old silenced. My reality is not a story the world wants to hear. Because it destroys the narrative of the ‘evil white male’ as the sole problem on earth and the ‘rich white bitch’ as the most powerful creature imaginable. The former isn’t true any longer, and the latter never existed. But they are convenient caricatures.
We’ve entered a new, very fucked up age where oppressed women are being told they are privileged and should therefore shut up and that the very people who are oppressing them and threatening them most are somehow the most in need and should therefore be supported above anyone else. It’s ass-backwards in a way we’ve not quite seen before. Yes, the world is actually quite different than what we read in the papers. And you’d know this if you listened to real people’s experiences in an unbiased, unselective way or lived as an unprotected (unpartnered, childless, white) woman yourself.
I have also noticed something else, and it is happening in tandem with or possibly even as a result of this brave-new-world turn of events. Inter-racial, sex-based crime is on the rise. And we are pretending it doesn’t exist. You see, it’s not white guys doing it, so of course, no one wants to focus on it.
I experience a lot of violence and general racist sexism in China. Not just from the Chinese, but from those I encounter from other places too. I can only remember one verbal assault by a white male while living in Taiwan 14 years years ago. That’s it. White guys are douchebags, and they talk too much (like all men), but they are not the biggest problems on the violent crime front. In multiple countries over the years, I can’t begin to count the assaults and threats committed by non-whites against me. It’s not just men who hurt me, but they are the more threatening group, obviously.
As recent as two weeks ago, I was assaulted by three black male immigrants on a subway in Paris, very early one morning. They weren’t ‘young ruffians’, just in case you automatically started to make excuses for them, but closer to my age. Presumably, they had wives and families. And they saw me, and physically assaulted me, and tried to prevent me from escaping. I had to yell and get physical to defend myself. The train wasn’t full, but all other passengers were black or Arab, so of course, no one helped me. (I’ve experienced this phenomenon in L.A. as well. Let the white bitch die, kind of thing.) So I couldn’t report it either for obvious reasons. White. Middle-aged. Female. Poor. Dressed very shabbily. Resourceless. Foreigner. And the perps – protected black male immigrants. They won. They always do, I’ve discovered this universal truth through all my years of victimization by non-white men. And this is the new running theme, especially in Europe, but increasingly elsewhere. White men used to be the problem. They aren’t any longer. Not in the way that non-white men are now. The latter have a get out of jail free card. They are ‘oppressed’. And the targets are increasingly, lone white women. We all know that women always have to pay for what men have done or are perceived to have done. Am I targeted because I am white and female? Black women have always told white women that they aren’t ‘women’ but ‘black women’. White women have always protested because if they said ‘we are white women’, it would be racist or elitist, but finally, after considering black women’s words very seriously, I think they are 100% right. White women need to start seeing themselves in the same way, especially in light of our reality. We are being targeted for our race AND sex, they can’t be separated, and mark my words, the violence is going to escalate, especially for those of us who are not of the protected class (I.e., women who are usually in the company of another person, such as male owner, lesbian partner, children, or who have enough money to remove themselves from the racist violent hordes). Solitary women are in danger. And we can’t always choose to be unsolitary. Some of us just end up that way, sometimes simply because we’ve been the sole minority in a racist, sexist culture and community and work environment for years on end.
Although not superstitious, I’ve been terrified that this year that I’ll be raped. I was violently raped by a Muslim Arab when I was 35, and gang-raped when I was 25. I’m 45 now. It’s a decade rapeversary that I had started dreading an entire year before I turned 45. So far this year, I’ve been assaulted sexually and physically several times by Chinese, Arabs and blacks, but I’ve managed to escape rape. Not going out much has likely helped. But the time spent in Europe, especially in France and Germany, has been terrifying. And violent. The sheer number of traditional, uneducated, violent, non-white males let into those countries without a criminal record check has been a recipe for trouble. (Although, really, what they do would never show up were record check ever done…) The women aren’t really a problem except for the religious bullshit, but the MEN are. In whose mind is letting in masses of pro-rape, anti-Western-female, uneducated, religious fanatics a good idea? It doesn’t hurt local men, but it is a massive threat to women. Telling women they have to accept and respect yet another anti-woman culture, and to shut the hell up if something bad happens to them since they probably deserve whatever comes is just no good. I find it is protected, liberal white women who scream the loudest about foreign rapists’ and anti-woman-terrorists’ rights. It is shameful to shame the true victims, the unprotected women who aren’t fucking men in exchange for improved lifestyle and resources and relative safety.
I don’t participate in the whole ‘MeToo’ thing mostly because I don’t think any heterosexual endeavour can ever make a difference to women as a class because mixed messages don’t work, but I wonder if any women have been brave enough to speak out against non-white assault of white women. It isn’t just me going through this. That I know from the hushed conversations with confused, self-hating, but angry, white females I’ve talked to.
I’ve travelled and lived around the world for more than 20 years, and pre-hetero-and liberal deprogramming, I dated and friended extensively among the non-white international male (and female) community. I can’t stress enough how men of all races and all stations of life terrorize, benefit from, and have immense power over women of all races and stations of life. Women, especially white women, who bleet on about how white men are the worst either live in very, very small worlds with limited exposure to the range of men out there, or they are in some serious denial of reality reinforced by current liberal ideology. Wake up, sisters. You’re speaking untruths. And worse, you’re hurting women with your propaganda.
Anyhow, it’s the end of the year and rather than make resolutions, I want to send out my gratitude to all the men and boys who’ve helped to shape my reality and to open my eyes to what all males are. I present a list of my firsts, the men and boys who first introduced me to an experience or concept and who chipped away at my innocence, confidence and naivité. Some of it I learned from you as a child, some as a teenager, and some throughout my adulthood. Thank you, boys. Collectively, you’ve rocked my world. Your behaviour makes feminism necessary, I hope you realize. And I know with certainty (unlike my liberal sisters) that not a one of you is better or worse than any other. You all capitalize off the fear and compliance you inspire in women and girls.
So here goes:
White French men introduced me to the idea that female prostitutes do what they do because they love to fuck, therefore, prostitution is okay. They also introduced me to the idea that if they pay for your drink or meal, you are not allowed to speak in public.
Mexican men introduced me to white female slavery as a modern reality, to female child abduction and to mouth rape.
East Indian men introduced me to relationship rape dressed up as ‘aggressive and exciting sex’, and to porn as sex education.
Native Canadian/American men introduced me to the idea of terrorism of girls and women in the workplace and the idea that all women, regardless of colour, will be punished if they react negatively to the terrorism. They also introduced me to the reality that men of colour have always done better and will always do better than all women in the workplace, and they are almost always rewarded for abusing female coworkers.
Jewish men introduced me to the idea that if men or boys can’t fuck you, they’ll cheat on you with your best friend. This kickstarted my thinking on the reality of coercive and manipulative rape as the most common form of rape and the single most common reason women (are forced to) consent to sex in relationships.
Cambodian men introduced me to the idea of paying a man to use me as a prostitute.
Muslim men (well before the recent events in Europe) introduced me to publicly conducted, race- and sex-motivated, group-coordinated attempted-murder of white women. They showed me that the Western world has no interest in preventing Muslim men from hurting, raping and murdering white women. They also introduced me to the Muslim male hate- and rape-fueling love of white woman porn; to violent relationship rape; to the treatment of my body as a non-consensual cum dumpster, and to the treatment of my body during my period as a filthy, untouchable, but still blow-job-giveable piece of garbage.
Taiwanese men introduced me to daytime, streetside sexual assault, and to daytime, unwanted racist propositioning for dick-servicing.
Chinese men and boys introduced me to racist sexual harassment and sexual assault of white female lecturers in the secondary and post-secondary classroom.
White British men introduced me to gang rape; to punishing rape victims; to violent rape-porn as a fun gift for one’s male mates; and to the idea that women should relinquish their names and the names of their children upon marriage.
Black men introduced me to racist and unpunishable stalking of white women for the purpose of rape, and to the idea of women only being allowed to have ‘sexual power’ – the power to inspire boners. They taught me that only men get access to economic and legal power. They also introduced me to the concept of military cock-servicing requirements when stationed abroad.
Homeless men introduced me to the idea that public libraries are extremely dangerous places for women and girls – workers and patrons.
Christian men introduced me to the idea that making Sundays into ‘holy days’ (non-shopping days) provides men with the perfect daytime opportunity to lay in wait for teenaged girls walking through deserted commercial areas trying to get to friends’ homes or libraries to study.
But it all started with my father introducing me to rape as the ultimate entertainment for male adults and male children.
What would life have been like if men and boys didn’t do what they do best – terrorize, enslave, and attempt to destroy women and girls? Unimaginable…
Happy New Year! I hope your holiday is rape- and fear-free.
I’ve read a growing number of disturbing feminist articles, written by whites and non-whites, straights and lesbians, and most calling themselves ‘radical feminists’ (which they are not) calling for the elimination of white women. One woman wanted to replace the term ‘women’ with ‘women of colour’, because she argued that white women were a minority. Um, yeah, that kind of logic doesn’t fly when you propose that even smaller world minorities (Jews, aboriginal Canadians or Americans) be excluded from the term ‘human’. Too bad. Other than her racist, sexist, linguistic-eugenics idea, that woman’s site was pretty good. But damn, fucking with the meaning of the word ‘woman’ reminded me of the shit that trannie-dudes are trying (and are successfully), managing to pull off.
Another feminist ordered white women to spread their legs only for men of colour in order to get rid of the white race. Note that there was no such cunt-regulation demanded of women of colour: say for Asian women to get their rape on with Arab men, or black women with South-Pacific island men. Nope. It was a racist, sexist, pro-natal, pro-eugenics post written by a self-hating, white woman. It made me sister-sad that she had internalized the growing white-woman-hatred that isn’t just liberal-speak anymore. But I used to buy into self-immolation. Having another reason to hate yourself is crazy tempting as a female person.
Now, last time I checked, proposing to eliminate a single race of people was called eugenics. I’m not entirely sure what white women have done to terrorize the world other than to be the slaves of white men, who commit actual crimes. Is that a crime? Is being a slave an act of racial terrorism? And is it any different to any other group of women being slaves of the men of their group. Should Muslim women be killed for Muslim male terrorism and the chopping off of little girls’ clits, for example? Should Japanese mob-boss wives be held accountable for the horrific acts of the Yakuza? Unprogrammed, free women of any race could never come up with and take pleasure in the horrors men have wrought on the world. Rest assured, each group of women experiences their special brand of racism and sexism in different parts of the world, in addition to sexism within their own racial group. And each race of women has their own advantages that others don’t have. This can depend on culture and geography and who holds what power in which place. Eliminating women doesn’t solve anything. (Imagine a world without women here.)
So I disagree with the selective elimination of one race of people. Even white people. As much as I dislike white men, they are no better or worse than any other group of men. But I do like the idea of eliminating all races. No, not a mass killing of the entire world. But the elimination of race altogether.
I don’t like any racial purity ideation at all, and ALL RACES believe in racial purity. In fact, the more mono-racial the country or culture, the more they believe in their own racial superiority, purity, and preservation of that purity. I think people are really losing the plot when they talk about racism and supremacy. Come live where I have lived for years. Every fucking time I have to interact with college- and even PhD-educated, never mind the uneducated, people here in China, they make these scary race-supremacist comments that make my blood run cold. They sound like whites from 100 years ago, or my middle-school-only-educated grandmother, or one of those secluded, website-running, gun-hoarding, but generally public-avoiding American nut jobs living in the wilderness. In fact, as much as I can’t stand those survivalists who support preservation of the white race, they pretty much keep to themselves and do far less damage than say, race- and sex-supremacist Muslim terrorists who deliberately go abroad, gain trust, education and resources of the borrowed culture, and then blow up things… and people. And here in China, ‘racism’ in Chinese is a word that inspires pride, not shame, and is one of the national tenets instilled in modern Chinese communist thinking by the internationally revered Sun Yat-Sen.
No, I say get rid of all pure races. After biological sex, and then sexual orientation, race is a significant target of violence and discrimination for all women and some men. Getting rid of white people, even just the men, absolutely would not solve the problem because all racial purists (which is pretty much everyone in the world) will just continue their wars and hatred towards the ‘others’. Because all of that race-hatred that most feminists like to talk about INSTEAD of actual misogyny was started and perpetuated by men, the goal of which always has been and still is to protect and covet the cunts of the women owned by that racial group, and more recently serves to divide and conquer women and prevent their coming together over misogyny. Racism would never have been a thing if there were no men in existence. I firmly believe that. Racism is borne of woman-hatred, and that is a fact.
As for culture, which in monoracial cultures cannot truly be separated from race, and in religious cultures cannot be separated from religion, I’d like to see culture be based on climate or geography rather than race, ethnicity, misogyny, or magical thinking. Racial culture tends to be very exclusionary and becomes stronger due to racial tensions. Defensive racial pride always springs up following direct conflict – I see this all the time in China when the Chinese act as aggressors and then play victim to surrounding countries (Japan, the Philippines, Taiwan, etc.). And in the West, you get liberal wailing about stuff like ‘cultural appropriation’, which is hard to believe is a thing because there are so many bigger and REAL fucking issues like RAPE and MURDER and HUMAN TRAFFICKING, for example, and is done, incidentally, by all cultures in the world. China does it all the time, and it is annoying – especially when their sole focus of cultural appropriation is on capitalizing monetarily off of, rather than understanding and appreciating of , other cultures’ traditions and festivals. No, I see culture based on something else entirely. It’s hard for me to imagine people getting nasty, proprietary, warlike, and exclusionary over cultural issues and traditions centred on weather, climate, and geography, for example. I like that kind of celebration of life much better. It not only isn’t based on unchangeable physical qualities like biological sex or race, but on Nature herself. What a beautiful thing to celebrate rather than selfish human pursuits. I’ve always been wary of human self-worship.
I’ll end on an even more unpopular note by saying that the only eugenics I could ever get behind is the elimination of male people, and I say it from a defensive position based on actual evidence rather than the kind of baseless and aggressive, sadistic hatred men have for women. In removing – not maliciously torturing, just removing – men, I seek to protect women. Men of all races are the international terrorists of women of all races, holding us hostage through rape and torture, and the threat of rape, and forced heterosexuality. They cause every single problem and fear we experience as women. They are the number one predator on the planet, more dangerous and fear-inspiring than contagious viruses and bacteria, natural disasters, and wild animals combined. But you have to be able see and accept reality and data and facts, and then to overcome your fear of punishment, in order to name the real problems. Eliminate whites, and you don’t solve a damned thing other than short-lived, smug, racist satisfaction. But other male racial groups will easily and quickly and violently step in and take over the domination-submission, racial-sex-slavery heterosexuality paradigm that men thrive on and demand. But take out men, and dare to dream.
Language Corners. Phenomena popular in, but likely not limited to, China, most often take the form of loose to semi-structured informal events where people gather to practise speaking a particular foreign language. I have years of experience participating in ‘English Corners’. For many years, I was forced to organize and participate in Corners at the places where I worked. They were horrible. Students would come to be entertained rather than learn and participate fully, and to ask me the same boring questions about whether I could use chopsticks and if I loved China. But I’ve managed to live in a few large places where locals organize Corners for anyone who wants to participate and that aren’t dependent on the attendance of native speakers. Nanjing, former capital of China, has a long-running (well over 25-30 years now) and excellent English Corner that meets in a local park at night once a week and is attended by people of all ages and abilities and walks of life. It is quite fabulous.
The city where I currently work has a number of language Corners. Some are held at universities and some at public parks. I’ve attended several, and as might be expected, some are better than others. I once attended one that seemed to attract aggressive and annoying men seeking to perv on the young Chinese girls who attended and to engage in antagonistic and exhausting ‘conversation’ with yours truly. Mostly though, if I attend an English Corner at all, I attend the private one held by the enthusiastic students at my own campus. They’re good kids, and I’m the first person to preserve and foster any natural desire to learn and better oneself. You can’t buy curiosity, and it is hard to find in this world in this day and age.
Recently, I’ve been motivating myself for a major life change. I’m really thinking about moving to France as early as next year. It is a work in progress. I speak passable French and I can think in the language, but I have to admit, I am far from bilingual and years of disuse has done a number on my grammar and vocabulary. Years in China hasn’t helped. But I recently discovered a local multi-language Corner. The bulk of the participants attend to practise speaking English, but there are small groups of people there wishing to speak Korean, Japanese, Spanish, and as luck would have it, French. Needless to say, I am ecstatic. I made a pact with a friend of mine to attend every week with her- she wants to work on having more intellectual discussions in her already excellent English. And I need to reawaken and tone my French muscles.
The other night had a decent turn-out. Some weeks, there may only be one other person wanting to speak French, but there were three native speakers from Africa this time in addition to a few regular Chinese attendees I’ve gotten to know. Unfortunately, they were dudes, and to my great surprise and dismay, they were part of a large international group of special forces soldiers in China for a year-long training program. Creepy, scary, and weird. China is training the world’s elite, state-sanctioned rapists and murderers now!!! Anyhow, I stuck with the group until the Africans started asking the locals why there is no young Chinese pussy available to them. Apparently, everyone has a boyfriend!!! These black dudes may be here for military training, but they are definitely also here to fuck local bitches and possibly to find one to marry. Barfo. I am so not interested in heterosexual female slavery or men of any colour (sorry, liberal feminists, it isn’t just white men) whining about not finding a line-up of women on their backs, legs spread waiting for them.
I left the group to look for my friend among the ESL’ers.
And I found her in a weird situation. It was a small group, and a Chinese guy was lambasting her in an aggressive stance jabbing the air with his finger in an accusatory fashion. You know this type and this move. Very male, very threatening. So he notices me approaching, turns on me, and with no preamble, salutation, or welcome, immediately gives me a task. “YOU are going to settle this for us.” Now, I don’t like being told what to do, especially by men, but as my friend was involved, I asked what was going on instead of just turning around. From what I could gather, they had been discussing ‘single life’, which I think was one of the topics of the evening. I am not sure what exactly my friend had said, but dickface had gone on the offensive. I think she must have challenged his heterosexual assumption that women’s bodies were the property of men and that to be single was a female crime against humanity. He was speaking loudly and started describing her as a ‘gentleman-lady’, which was supposed to be an insult, in addition to insulting her intelligence and existence.
I stopped him and concluded that she had won the argument hands down. That made him mad. He looked for ways to put his natural violence and anger upon me. He accused me of being American (classic move for many anti-Americans as if it is some sort of point-scoring argument), to which I suggested that he wasn’t very smart if he was making stupid assumptions that ended up not being true. I’m not American. Then he started suggesting that obviously we were lesbians and should kiss. He kept saying that over and over, which I think was at the root of his original anger at my friend. It was positively immature and scary behaviour. It was also clear that my friend, whom I later found out had been further attacked by the other males in the group for other incomprehensible reasons, was forced into a position where she was trying to defend herself. I’ve been there. When you’re 21, and for most women throughout their entire life, you are constantly forced by males and some male-focused females to defend your human status. A few of us manage to learn that self-defense is futile. You can’t win nonsensical arguments. And men love the fight. They gain energy. You lose yours to them. You are derailed, and often, your small confidence is further shaken. You shrink and eventually give up trying to be human. And there is always the fear that there will be violence. Not just verbal violence.
So I decided to start the fucking party. I’m not 21 anymore, and I don’t believe men can or even want to end their violence. Every second you give them is a waste unless you are taking them down with certainty. I have various strategies for dealing with assholes. You have to be careful, though. You have to know who you’re up against and how dangerous they are. Sometimes you can you embarrass them. Sometimes you can intimidate them. Sometimes, you just have to walk away and find a safe place. But regardless of douchebag type, I always recommend never entering a pointless argument where you’re put on the defense. It’s like arguing with a religious person – they don’t come from a place of truth or fact, and have massive power behind them that will put society on their side if things get weird for you. So this guy? Stupid, a coward targeting a very young woman, and possibly violent if alone with him. But in a group setting, he needed to be controlled and dismissed. So I took the upper hand. I pointed out that he was rude and aggressive and not very smart, and that I wasn’t going to join a group discussion with a shameful person like him in it, and I moved to take my friend with me. He put himself on the defense, trying to negate my statements about him, which was exactly what I wanted, and he soon realized he couldn’t win against me since I wouldn’t engage. He walked away with a buddy of his. Lack of easy prey made English Corner much less appealing, apparently.
Now what made me really angry was that no one would speak up against him. Quietly looking on as he destroyed a young woman was apparently just dandy. This is very Chinese. People do not defend or help one another here unless they are family. Everyone else is persona non grata. I’ve seen it in countless situations, myself. But it happens everywhere, every day. A Chinese will literally let someone they don’t know die on the street in front of them instead of help them. And I’m not making it up. Every month or so, some embarrassing cell phone video or news story shows up online shaming all Chinese because someone let a child hit by a car die on the sidewalk without help, or some homeless old person dies of neglect despite pleas for help, or a foreigner ends up saving some local person drowning in a lake as a heap of Chinese look on apathetically. So, I was angry, but not surprised that an entire group of adult people said nothing while this man got progressively more aggressive and abusive with a young woman.
The guy walked away, and the group re-formed. And suddenly, everyone was telling me that they had seen him at another English Corner behaving in the same way. Ha! And the best part – everyone was insisting that he was not from China!!! Excuse much? Of course he was from China. I’ve met a shit ton of Chinese dudes like this one. Domineering, argumentative, aggressive, and mansplainy. And all I could think was ‘why hasn’t anyone stopped him?’ as this particular Corner is generally known for having some sort of decorum and civility thanks to the volunteer organizers supposed vigilance. But this happens to a certain extent in all cultures. We make excuses for men. We allow them to dictate proceedings. We allow their violence, their aggression, their abuse. They can’t help it, you see. Especially if their targets are women. Women are expected to shut up and put up. And to keep the love and support flowing while pretending that nothing is wrong.
I’m perfectly happy to break an ego or abusive cycle if the life of the party is a homophobic, racist misogynist.
This is Part III in my exploration of the human obsession known as sexuality. The other parts are:
Part I: An introduction to male omnisexuality and why heterosexuality is even a thing at all.
Part II: The sex drive and sexuality – human obsessions and two misunderstood and badly abused concepts. Also a brief consideration of homosexuality, asexuality, and forced sexuality.
Part IV: Added a few years later: let’s talk about the second loudest (trans win for loudest… and craziest) self-proclaimed victim group forcing their way into the LG-alphabet soup. Bisexuals! Real or constructed?
Although their actual life-or-death needs are exactly the same as those for women and are exactly four in number – food, water, sleep and shelter – in their natural proclivity for violence, power and control, men have elevated ‘sex’ (defined as dick servicing) to a life-or-death need. It isn’t. No man has ever died from lack of sex.
Using standard male logic, men will try to argue that women should be made available to them, either through unpaid or unequal barter-based sex slave relationships (girlfriend, wife), or through paid rent-a-sex-slave situations (prostitution) because without it they will a) become more violent and agitated, in general, b) will lose control and rape, and c) it is magically ordained by some sky-god or by Nature. The conclusion (threat) that follows from this (non-) logic is: “let us rape you or we will rape you harder, and cause lots of other problems as well.” And a lot of women will believe this ‘men have needs’ illogic and give in to what, in a nutshell, is coercive or manipulative rape. There is all sorts of mindfuckery that accompanies the threat so as to paint rape as an expression of love and to paint women’s reluctance or denial of service as some sort of cruel punishment or selfishness or prudery. Coercive or manipulative rape, the most common and least acknowledged form of rape, will be discussed in another post.
Simplicity vs Complexity: Men and Women
Men are easy to understand. Get a handle on understanding the motivations of power, control, selfishness, violence, and high emotionality within a limited range, and you’ve pretty much got them down. Even their omnisexuality and why they choose to gravitate, for the most part, to declared heterosexuality (despite what they do behind closed doors) is very, very easy to understand.
Women, on the other hand, are much more difficult to pin down. And there are a few very good reasons for this. Part of it may be that we are more complex beings to begin with. Men often say this as a criticism, but that only speaks to their inability to understand complex systems and their failure to control us completely. Our inner lives are deep and rich. We understand things on so many more levels. We are detail-oriented as well as big picture thinkers. We think both concretely and abstractly. We are connected with nature on a fundamental level and yet our minds and spirits soar beyond all horizons. We are more in touch with our instincts, and at the same time, have the capacity to override our lizard brain gut reactions and act with logic, compassion, empathy, and compromise. Yes, we are complex beings, and in this way, are usually hard to put into the categorical boxes that men design for us.
But there is another reason women are hard to pin down. Unlike men, women are not allowed to be natural. I wrote a whole post on the interaction effects of nature and nurture and how only women are not allowed to realize their natural selves, forced instead into a male-defined, simplistic, discrete system of stereotypes and categories. Our exploitable natural qualities are reinforced and used against us, while the natural abilities and tendencies that threaten the male dominance structure are punished and suppressed. In reality, we have no idea what a natural woman is. We don’t know what female power looks like. We don’t know exactly how strong female energy burns. What we do know is that the way men force us to define ourselves is not only inadequate, but completely unnatural and self-destructive. And we do know that the natural woman has not predominated because we are not violent by nature. You can’t fight natural male violence with reason, logic and intellect despite what many feminists say.
So What About Female Sexuality?
I have a young, female friend here in China who suggested to me recently that all women are lesbians. She is 21, she has no sexual interest in men, she is not sure if she is sexually interested in women, and she is trying to figure out what she is. This is what everyone who doesn’t succumb to hetero brainwashing wrestles with. What are they? You MUST be sexually attracted to something. It is mandatory. But what if you aren’t? When I talk to my young friend, I know she is drawn to women. She feels comfortable and safe with them. She likes to experience a rich, deep perspective on the world that only women can give. She has, at an enviably early age, discovered the joys of reading women’s writing – mostly from other countries as Chinese women don’t have much of a voice in Chinese literature. Like myself and other women, she has realized that men’s writing offers little. It has no depth, no nuance, no intellect, and too much literal and figurative violence. You cannot recognize yourself in male writing if you are a woman who has escaped or started to escape your heterosexual programming.
So, is my friend a lesbian?
Unfortunately, we are forced to define ourselves through our sexuality, thanks to men and their simplistic way of thinking. It can be very confusing to those who don’t fit into boxes and those who haven’t embraced their programming completely. So using male language and self-concepts, being a lesbian primarily means you get sexually turned on by women. You can still hate women, hate yourself, support harmful gender parodies, and be completely unable to connect with women on all levels but a sexual one. You can be a complete misogynist and still be a lesbian as long as you lust after girls. And ironically, you can connect with women in many ways, but be excluded from the lesbian team if you don’t connect sexually with women. Although I don’t think men are smart enough to have engineered this sad situation, through their violent sexual machinations throughout history, this genital obsession and sex-based club formation has become the perfect way to divide women and keep men supported.
In order to really examine women’s sexuality (if it exists naturally), you have to remove the male voice from the equation entirely. Nothing a man does, says or thinks ever truly helps women understand their natural selves or their needs or desires. I have never, ever, ever met a male who doesn’t include himself, his ‘needs’ and his desires in his plans, opinions, reactions and interactions. Men cannot talk about female sexuality without thinking about themselves, even if they cloak the language in something that seems objective on the surface. Women are too quick to hand out blow jobs to male people who pay some kind of faux lip service to women’s ‘choices’ and ‘freedom’. Men are not objective. Remember, they have too much to lose from women discarding them and discovering their natural selves and their true freedom. And as predators, men are expert manipulators. So, to explore women’s natural state, you have to remove male influence, the male voice, and the male threat. It is very difficult to do. We are not taught to think about ourselves, and male people of all ages have a way of tapping into the altruistic and/or sympathetic parts of our natural selves and derailing us from taking care of ourselves.
To explore natural sexuality, you have to examine needs. What do women need? Forget those asinine women’s magazines which are basically outlets for the male voice. Women don’t need to feel sexy or beautiful. Women don’t need a closet full of clothes or the right colour lipstick. Women don’t need the ‘right man’ or flowers on her birthday or a special night to focus on her orgasms instead of sucking her master’s cock.
First, women need food, drink, sleep and shelter. Those are the basic survival needs. After that, we start talking about needs related not to survival, but quality of life. Women need love, affection, human connection, acceptance – all of those things related to human interaction and relationships. And to escape from male language control, when I say love and affection, I’m not talking about sex or orgasms. I’m talking about feeling loved and appreciated and having emotional exchange, all free from threat, duty and coercion. I suspect all men and most women don’t truly understand what this means as we have been so corrupted by male thinking on what love and relationships are.
Women also need dreams, goals, confidence, aspirations, inspiration, motivation, hope, and empowerment. Again, these are needs related to quality of life – those things that make life worth living, and that make having consciousness make sense. These are not related to the material world or to sex. And while no one dies from lack of love or lack of empowerment or dreams, they will likely live in a depressed state with plenty of physical and mental health problems. This is how most women currently live, and I’d argue that it is because of forced heterosexuality and living in the male system that relies upon it. Forcing women to submit to men deprives them of those needs that make life worth living. And all of their energies instead are poured into ensuring that men not only achieve all of these personal needs, but they also have an abundance of them to draw from any time they wish. Further, introducing a sexual element to a relationship, especially, but not only with men, redirects energy away from women having their own quality-of-life-based needs met and into ensuring the male partner is well cared for and sexually catered to.
The best friendships I’ve had with women have been those that tap into quality-of-life needs, and those friendships, if they break down, are always because of the intrusion of a demanding parasitical male. Hetero-programmed women are hard to be long-term friends with, I’ve found, for this very reason. There is always a parasite lurking, whether it be a husband, a new boyfriend, or a male child. Marriage and breeding paradigms – systems invented by men to support male supremacy – have always served to divide women, break down female friendships, and redirect female energy into male goals and success.
Friendships with men, regardless of their age, have never genuinely addressed affection needs or empowerment needs. Males in friendships have their needs addressed, as they siphon female energy. And I can’t think of a single friendship with a male that didn’t end up destroyed by sexual propositions or downright sexual harassment, sometimes after years of supposedly platonic interaction. By design, I currently have very few males in my life. One of the last remaining ones, a former student here in China, 21 years my junior whom I’ve kept around only because I have had some success mentally desexing male students and seeing them only as ‘students’, just ruined our two-year, ongoing interaction last week by announcing that he is ‘in love with me’. It was so utterly disappointing and confusing, especially because I am open about not being interested in men, and I stupidly thought I was immune from most sexual predation from men because I’m 45 and I don’t feminize. I’m not sure if there are mommy issues going on or the idea of converting the possible ‘lesbian’ was irresistible. Regardless, the teaching point here is that there is no such thing as an exception when it comes to men. They are all predators. They make everything about sex. And no woman is safe. Ever.
Oh and in case you are snarking, “What about gay males? They are basically women…” Don’t worry, they are all male, and thus, they are predators and consumers of women, too. I personally had a gay male friend in college who eventually told me in all seriousness that he would try to go straight to be with me. Weird, and believe it or not, I didn’t take him up on the offer… Nevertheless, while that may not be a normal scenario for all fags, they still do their best to steal female emotional energy, treat us as verbal punching bags (aside from blacks, fags are some of the worst hate-speakers towards women), use our bodies (to determine gayness or as rented baby factories), and to fight their human rights battles (think the AIDS epidemic), while not returning the favour, especially for lesbians. So fuck them, but not literally 😉
So back to the question: what about female sexuality? Are women sexual beings? I suspect this wouldn’t be an important question if men didn’t exist. I don’t think sex would take on even a fraction of the importance it has now if men didn’t exist. I don’t think relationships would form and break up on the basis of sexual activity and attraction if men didn’t exist. I think without men, women would take physical pleasure in each other, but it wouldn’t form the basis of relationships, and wouldn’t be the stuff of obsessions. Life would be rich, complex, layered. As it is now, everything is sex. People kill themselves and each other over it. Half the population is enslaved because of it. Without men, there would be so much less pain and destruction. With men in the picture, women are not naturally heterosexual. Nothing about heterosexuality is naturally good for women; it is destructive. If women were naturally straight, programming would not be needed. Violence would not be needed. There is so much effort (violence, threats, propaganda) put into turning women into men’s willing sex and labour slaves, it is impossible to argue that heterosexuality is natural for women. I think women are naturally drawn to women, but I would define ‘lesbian’ differently than it is currently understood in system of male dominance. There may be a sexual component, but the affinity is based on more complex things that override any kind of central sexuality.
In short, I don’t think male language and thinking are adequate for describing what women are naturally. Categorical male thinking and vocabulary – heterosexual, bisexual, queer, homosexual, asexual – may be fine for describing men (I prefer omnisexual as a more accurate description of what men are), but not for women. Ideally, women need be released from male control and male demands for sex so that they may discover what they need and to realize and embrace the quality of life no woman has yet achieved, but so very clearly deserves.
I seek to address problems that make people uncomfortable, and I talk about issues that even most feminists won’t address. I plan to do the same here. I’ve been wanting to write this one for a long time. It is an exploration. Stuff to think about. Impossibilities, likely.
Is it possible for women to achieve what racial and religious groups have – to make discrimination a no-no; to achieve federal human rights protections; to have crimes against them designated as hate crimes; to eliminate group-targeted slurs from daily public, media and entertainment usage; and to legally make language used against group members into hate speech?
Men Succeed, Women Don’t
Unfortunately, the group we call ‘women’, despite being the largest and longest oppressed group on the planet is missing something crucial that every single other group has had and that has worked to their advantage. Men. All oppressed groups in history, except for women, have had male members. And note that men who think they are women – trannies – are not women, but oppressors of women and mentally ill men. They don’t count among us despite what they force us to call them, and they should never be included in the class known as women. They are a class of men, and they are oppressors, not the oppressed. We know they are men because of their XY chromosomes, of course, but we also have evidence that they are men because we see how quickly they have changed policy to destroy and further oppress women. No group of women ever has achieved or ever could achieve what trannie men have. In fact, no actual oppressed group that includes men has ever stayed oppressed for long. We know the ‘why’ (because men have power and women don’t), but it is not entirely clear ‘how’ (how do men exert power so effectively?) this can be. We can consider some of the following possible explanations for how men succeed in overcoming oppression while women don’t.
1) Men tend to resort to violence to get what they want. Women tend to cower and submit when they are threatened. Programming from birth ensures that boys’ aggression and violence is deemed natural and acceptable, especially when acting in self-defence, while girls’ aggression is punished and any self-defence is absolutely NOT allowed and often turned around to appear as unnatural, and even persecutory aggression.
2) Men are more respected, in general, regardless of group affiliation, and it is easier to get what they want because of the normalized and universal respect for cock, even oppressed cock. Having a cock automatically gives you a voice in public. Vagina is universally hated – you can’t respect what you hate, and consequently, most believe on some level that you can’t oppress what you hate because they deserve what they get, and so women’s progress is barely measurable. It further helps that male hate is often called and accepted as ‘love’, so they can argue that their oppression of us is actually a demonstration of love. Note that having a vagina automatically disallows you a voice in public unless you are a cock proxy – directly supporting a male dominance agenda, in other words.
3) Men are very good at getting on board with self- and group-serving agendas and can achieve a sort of strength-in-numbers kind of situation when they perceive themselves to be oppressed. Women, on the other hand, very seldom support one another, let alone push for policy that would benefit themselves as women. Feminists have never achieved a critical mass, as a result. It is hard to win freedom from men when some of the most aggressively opposed are women themselves. It has nothing to do with an inability of women to organize en masse. No, women are actually better able to plan and get organized than men are. Rather, women are programmed from birth to support males and hold females under suspicion. Women will fight to the death to keep men doing the horrible things they do with impunity. But ask a woman to support a feminist? Get ready to have your head cut off and paraded on a pike. Even some feminists eat their own.
4) Men tend to expect others to sacrifice for them, are very protective of their own perceived rights and freedoms, and have a very strange conception of compromise. Women tend to compromise easily. They also tend to sacrifice, but instead call it compromise just as they have been taught by their male-serving mothers and male culture, in general. In this way, rather than stand up for themselves, women are more open to propaganda, guilt-tripping, and oppression. Expecting rights and freedoms as women is seen as selfish and greedy and uncompromising.
5) Oppressed men, with very little effort, tend to collect numerous fawning women to support their cause, doing grunt work, sacrificing their bodies in violent situations (cannon fodder), acting as warning systems, spies and saboteurs, providing free food and cleaning services, bolstering and building male confidence and egos, and acting as free prostitutes to service the troops. Men, on the other hand, don’t support women’s fights. Superficial supporters always have their own agenda (getting laid, scoring political points, etc.). Most actually tend to suppress any female efforts to liberate through violence, threats, abandonment in relationships, denial of free speech through no-platforming and refusal to publish, and denying female activists a place in academia and other influential areas.
6) Giving men rights and freedoms doesn’t hurt other men or affect economies detrimentally. The world economy we have known throughout history has, on the other hand, been completely dependent on female slavery. Male freedom (which isn’t an ethical freedom, but debauchery and inhumanity) requires female slavery. Capitalism cannot exist without female slavery and neither can communism as men have envisioned it. To give women rights and true freedoms and an escape from male tyranny would require a complete rethinking and reconstruction of the world economy. This scares men of all colours, who for all of history, have called their male privilege their god- or nature-given rights.
Personally, I believe that as long as males rule within the system we call ‘patriarchy’, a group that doesn’t contain males cannot succeed in achieving human rights and freedoms or be taken seriously politically, legally, socially and economically. But while lack of male membership is a major factor in continued female oppression, there is one other significant contributor: any oppressed group that supports, colludes with, and literally sleeps with their oppressor will never be set free. And no group save women has ever done this. I mean, can you seriously imagine blacks joining a neo-Nazi group and calling it freedom and equality and contentment – the natural order of things?*** And there isn’t a single underprivileged group, save women, that would be denied the right to live apart from oppressors in their own community. These days, even women’s associations and events are attacked and forced to accept either infiltration or disbandment. But women are brainwashed from birth not only to ignore the dangers men pose to their well-being and contentment, but to embrace rape and slavery and humiliation and call them something else entirely. For those few who reject male domination, there is absolutely nowhere on the planet that is safe and free of men, male influence, male violence, male domination, and of course, the colluding, cock-sucking henchwomen who attack them for saying ‘no, thank you’.
***I did know a super-scary black dude in high school who joined the local skinheads, but that was only so he could beat the shit out of gays and lesbians as part of a cowardly group at every opportunity instead of as an individual – it wasn’t to support a white agenda.
In short, as long as the majority of women agree to unequal rape-based relationships with men and to breeding male children – and note it that isn’t true agreement since they are oppressed and programmed, and thus don’t come to the table on equal footing with men – ALL women will be oppressed by men. And it is this fact that keeps male power in place. If men can argue that women agree to their circumstances, then there is nothing wrong with it at all. To men, and to brainwashed women, agreement means free will/choice. And of course, no two things could be more falsely equated. Remember that brainwashing, programming, and social influence are powerful tools, especially when they are implemented at the most vulnerable stages in one’s life, such as in childhood or in desperate situations involving poverty or serious illness/injury. [Brainwashing, programming and social influence within the patriarchy will be dealt with in another post.] Those who manage to escape their programming, such as separatist, asexual or lesbian, non-breeding feminists, are very threatening to the system, and so the silencing of these opponents through several means is swift and brutal.
Lady Slurs Are on the Rise
If you listen to music, watch films or television, tune in to any kind of hard or soft news outlets, read magazines or other material – basically live in the world, in other words – you *may* have noticed that brutal language attacking women, including slurs (i.e., bitch, cunt, slut, whore, pair of tits, broad), denigrating comments (i.e., run like a girl, acting like a woman, bitches be shopping), and callous jokes (the various iterations of the 10-dollar whore joke), are on the rise. More than likely, like the majority of people, you’ve just become desensitized to it. It’s much like not noticing that the violent, sensationalized content of public materials has escalated. Interestingly, racism in the media is on everyone’s radar – racial slurs produce a very physical ‘cringe factor’ in most people – but the woman hate has not only escalated, but has become business as usual, accepted and parroted even by the targets of the hate. And the abuse comes from people of all races. In music, blacks are the worst perpetrators, but in television and film, everyone participates. Interestingly, but not unexpectedly, the targets of the violence and hate, especially in television and film, are more often than not, white women.
Blind as most are to escalating woman-hate, many people might respond to valid observation with something like:
- what’s the big deal?
- they’re just words – they don’t hurt anyone
- women are too sensitive
- women use them tooooooo!
- you’re exaggerating (crazy, bitter, stupid, or some standard dismissal of female truth-telling)
- you’re a man-hater, obviously
And my response is: if it really is no big deal, then why are slurs against all other groups termed ‘hate speech’ and have been removed from all public media and entertainment and can get you into serious trouble if you’re caught using them in public? Why is it legal to use a female slur in a business name, but not a racial slur? Why do some American television stations bleep out the F-word, but not the word ‘bitch’? What might it mean that women have internalized woman-hate and use the hate-speech themselves against themselves and other women? And why is pointing out real examples of woman-hate itself an example of women hating men??? Logic fails, all.
See, slurs are a big deal. Words have meaning and power, and a tool of control. Those who control language, control everything. And throughout time – and today is no different than any other time period – men control language and thus control women. Male hate speech against women poisons every aspect of women’s lives. Hate in language translates into hate in behaviour. When hate is condoned or written off or normalized, women suffer. Do you want to be interviewed by some man who sees you as a bitch and a cunt and masturbates to violent rape-porn? Do you think he compartmentalizes? No one is capable of separating the messages they internalize from how they treat others around them. And the fact that the hate is escalating, as evidenced in the language we hear and use, is very worrisome for women, indeed. It is a very big deal.
What’s on TV?
Media and entertainment are important propaganda machines existing under the guise of relaxing fun-times. People are much more likely to absorb messages, if they are delivered with humour or drama.
I was just watching a British television show that had been recommended to me by one of my more advanced Chinese university students interested in socio-technology (or techno-sociology, you pick). In the very first episode, the man who is playing the Prime Minister calls one of his white female employees a ‘stupid bitch’ and then proceeds to try to strangle her and then punches her in the face in front of a male employee. And I thought American entertainment was bad. Nope, woman-hate comes from all countries, all races, all religions, all ages. Some of my weirdest memories of blatant sexism during my childhood hetero-bitch programming years came from horrible British television (The Benny Hill Show, anyone?). But they are not alone.
On the American side of things, in the 2017 season of Veep, a political comedy starring Julia Louis-Dreyfus (whom I enjoy as an actress, but who saddens me in this role), was an episode entitled “C–tgate”. The episode partially revolved around the female president trying to figure out which of her staff had called her a ‘cunt’. In 28 minutes, the word cunt – probably the worst, most demeaning, single-word slur in today’s usage and possibly in the history of slurs – is used 15 times. Note that never once in the 6 seasons of this show has the slur ‘nigger’ been used, nor any other racial slur. Liberal, or conservative for that matter, television doesn’t use the big bad, notorious, racial slurs. Never once is the Chinese-American presidential candidate ever referred to as a ‘chink’. Never once is the Mexican-American woman who eventually becomes president ever referred to as a ‘spic’ (or even a bitch or cunt, for that matter). Cunt and bitch are words to use against women, primarily, but not exclusively, white women. And it is hard to imagine an entire television series devoted to a bumbling black president who is constantly undermined and continually racially slurred. Can you imagine an entire episode called ‘N-rgate’? It would NEVER happen. On the rare occasion that a racial slur is used, it is to call attention to racism and to use it as a teaching point about respecting men and women of colour.
Go back a few years, and take the American series ‘Boston Public’ which followed the work and personal lives of a bunch of teachers working at an inner city high school in Boston. In the first season, the white female teacher is called bitch constantly by everyone, and a violent, racist, misogynist, black male student spray paints ‘bitch’ on her blackboard, calls her bitch in public and then SPITS DIRECTLY IN HER FACE, none of which he is held accountable for. But the woman – the actual victim – is called racist, of course, and she spends the rest of the series feeling white guilt and accepting abuse and slurs from all the black characters as well as the white males on the show. Misogyny, which is more common on that program, is never addressed as a ‘teaching point’. It is just what women should accept. And white women are expected to accept abuse for what white men have done in past generations. THAT is the teaching point. Men are violent. Women pay the price so that men can continue enjoying the good things in life.
If you want to get your ‘bitch’ on in an older, but immensely popular series, watch the 15 seasons of ER like I did during a short, but intense period of boredom and misogyny research this summer. It was brutal. I don’t think I’ve heard the slur, ‘bitch’, used so frequently in a television series. Interestingly, there was only 1 official racial slur used in the entire 15 years of programming. A white supremacist used a Latino slur ONE TIME. For jokes, everyone was fair game, but the bulk of the jokes were about women, then gays, and a few racial jokes tossed in here and there. There was a shit ton of sexual harassment as entertainment. If you think women don’t internalize this hate, you are dead wrong. Now that my own eyes are open to patriarchy and brutal misogyny, every time I hear slurs, rape jokes, and sexual harassment, it is a slap in the face. It blows my mind that every single girl grows up swimming in this shit. And most girls and women never understand why they hate themselves so much, why life seems so much more difficult than men’s. Why they have no confidence. Why depression and PTSD occur much more frequently in women than in men. Why they are afraid and feel like they need protection. The propaganda serves to weight the chains around our necks and bodies and primes us to accept abuse from all men around us, and even to call their hate ‘love’.
The Slurs and What Men Mean When They Use Them
A little while back, I wrote a post on where the bitch and the whore came from. Let’s explore a little further to find out what men mean when they use the most common slurs. Note that anti-woman slurs are often used to insult men. The men aren’t really being victimized – simply being called a woman is a bad thing. Even men who ‘love’ women hate to be called or compared to a woman. That’s love and respect, right?
Honestly, this isn’t a word that I have much connection to or use for. I don’t recall ever hearing the word used when I was in high school. Skank, yes. But I never heard the word slut used. My parents never used it either, despite their frequent use of colourful language. The word has supposedly been around since 1450 to, very basically, describe a woman who behaves exactly the way men always have and always will without consequences. It is the essential representation of sexual double standard. I’m not sure there is a another word that captures the double standard like ‘slut’ does. Use of the word has led to ostracism, poverty, rape, beatings, and death for millions of women across time. While men designed the word to hurt and control women, it has also been used to drive a really fucked up wedge between women by essentially putting them into categories of ‘good’ (marriage-rapeable) and ‘bad’ (prostitution-rapeable and the unmarried stranger-rapeable). The term has been applied by men even to ‘virtuous’ women out of revenge or sadism to serve the male agenda. And even women themselves have used the term against other women, sometimes out of jealously of a perceived, but false, freedom or power of another woman. The simple application of the term to a women has had, in the past, the power to destroy her life completely. You really can’t say that about any racial slur. No one has ever been destroyed by words quite like women have.
Sadly, when women embrace this word, it changes something in the brain’s logic centre. Women who see themselves as sluts, proud or not, suddenly don’t know what to do when they have been raped. Can a slut be raped??? What is rape? Does he have to hit me since I seem to fuck anyone who expresses interest? Am I allowed to say ‘no’ since I have embraced the word ‘yes’? There is no handbook for women trying to navigate the liberal male agenda.
Every once in a while, you hear the word applied to men. ‘Male slut’ pops up once in a while, but it really has no impact on men, their reputations, their relationships, their jobs, or anything. Men might even laugh if they hear it, and it is doubtful they would find it offensive. It is a clear demonstration of who holds the power when you cannot reverse the offense with the same negative outcome.
Personally, I don’t see any use for this word, even if redefined or attempts at reclamation are made. I think we focus too much entirely on sex and sexuality, and would love to see this word fade away because of lack of use rather than repurposing. But after nearly 600 years of use, that ain’t gonna happen any time soon.
Prostitute is a rather recent and slightly more narrow term for a woman who sells her body to men. ‘Whore’ has been around in several languages (e.g., hore, hora, hoer, huora) for centuries (likely 16th century) to describe prostitutes, sluts, and women with very apparent sexual desires. The shortened ‘ho’, most likely from black American male slang, has been popularized as a way to refer to women, in general. It is most often applied today in the way that slut is. You also sometimes get constructions used to insult men, such as ‘son of a whore’. It’s actually still an insult to women, but men love playing the victim whenever they can.
This slur is used so often, I’m beginning to think it is a new replacement term for ‘woman’. In fact, I think the trannie dudes have taken over the word woman, and actual women have now become ‘bitches’. Black American men did a great deal of damage in repopularizing the word as a slur to use against women (circa 1990’s).
Bitch has a lot of usages. You can call anyone a bitch, yet it is still an insult to women. The term comes from female breeding dog and it was specifically used to insult women, dehumanize, and to designate one of her few allowed roles. Today, it can mean:
- woman or girl, in general
- woman or girl you don’t like or have anger towards
- a woman or girl who has stood up to a man and pointed out his privilege, unethical dealings, crimes, etc
- a woman or girl who is confident and does something that a man or boy might do but would not be insulted for, or even would be commended for
- a female boss, or woman in any kind of position of power
- someone forced to do your bidding and who will remain under your control
- (in prison) a weak male who will be forced to submit to sexual assault
- a man who displays emotion and who makes other men (and sometimes women) uncomfortable (e.g., “Stop crying like a bitch.”)
- ‘son of a bitch’ – used on men to mean something like asshole, it is still a slur on women above all else
- (verb) to complain – the implication is that women complain and should not, even if it is warranted
- ‘bitch slap’ – physical abuse to be used by men on a woman who is not acting the way he wants her to
- a thing you don’t like (e.g., “That was a bitch of an exam.”)
Probably the worst thing you can call a woman. It is not as popular (yet) as bitch, but it is on the rise. It is an abusive slang for vagina, but when used as a slur, it has similar meanings to that of bitch. It is generally not used on men as a female slur, however. Less commonly, it can be used to describe a situation that isn’t liked (a cunt of a meeting). The British and a few of their colonies unfortunately use the word, but in a non-negative way to refer to one of their dude-bros, as they might use ‘mate’ or to a random dude.
As mentioned above, the American series, Veep, will likely have a normalizing effect on this slur, thanks to devoting an entire ‘humourous’ episode to calling their first female president ‘cunt’ over and over and over and over…
Like a Girl
If a girl or woman is behaving naturally, then there is nothing wrong with what she is doing. There is nothing wrong with how girls run, throw, speak, walk, think, etc. If they are acting naturally (i.e., not gender-programmed into looking stupid or under-performing or trying to be ‘sexy’), then their actions will be efficient and effective. With behaviours that require skill, both boys and girls might perform poorly without training. The thing is that more effort is put into training boys. When equally trained, both boys and girls are effective. So the insult to males about performing like a girl is more about the very female-hate that prevents girls and women from being trained or even accepted as different than male people than any kind of natural ineptness. It also highlights the universal insistence that male performance is the default and thus the correct way, even if it isn’t correct at all.
Note that many of the ‘like a girl’ or ‘like a woman’ insults are actually projections. For example, ‘stop crying like a little girl’ (or screaming or tantrumming) doesn’t make sense because boys cry as much, if not more than girls. They also throw bigger tantrums and make more fucking noise than any girl I’ve ever encountered anywhere on the planet. And plenty of other claims like failing to use logic, or being bad at math – all of these are projections as well. Women tend to be better at logic than men and are equally good, if not better at math.
Body Parts and Animals
Female slurs are the worst in the world simply because women tend to be dehumanized more than any other group. They are reduced to their body parts, and they are referred to as animals. It is how women are treated both verbally and non-verbally in daily life and the workplace and in marriage, and it is how women are represented in language. Women are referred to: ‘a pair of tits’, ‘tits and ass’, ‘broad’, ‘cunt’, ‘pussy’, ‘fish’, ‘twat’, ‘legs’, ‘sugartits’, ‘piece of ass’, ‘cow’, ‘bitch’, ‘sow’, ‘heifer’, ‘filly’, and much more.
Black Men Succeeded
Some time ago, black men reclaimed the term ‘nigger’ and made it their own. The slur, rooted in Latin, Spanish and French from the word for ‘black’, lived for a short spell in a limited geographical region as a negative term for black people. It is no longer accepted or acceptable for use in public or in entertainment. It tends to be used only when a racist character is portrayed or when black dudebros are talking to each other. I won’t attempt to explain who gets to use it, or how, or why, or in which circumstances. I’m not a black dood, and mostly, I don’t really care about the intricacies of what men do to and with each other. All I can say here is that black men successfully got ‘nigger’ removed from the entire Western consciousness except as a term with punch-in-the-gut impact and out of mainstream derogatory use, with the support of the liberal white community. That speaks of some pretty serious social, legal, and political power. You can’t claim you lack power or status if you are able to get a slur thrown out of the public consciousness and usage. I mean, seriously, do you truly understand the implication of this? Controlling language is the ultimate evidence of power. But we’re talking about men here. And likewise, there isn’t a single racial or ethnic group that hasn’t succeeded in getting racial or ethnic slurs put on the chopping block – in Western cultures. But those groups contain men, and all men have power. Women of these groups benefited as well, which is probably part of why women of colour seldom side with white sisters under feminism. On some level, they understand they’ll achieve more power hitching a ride with men, even if those same men are making their lives miserable, acknowledged or not. White woman have no power, and neither do women of any other race, so gravitating to male people makes sense to those who don’t think, won’t think, or can’t think in more than a limited, short-term, very concrete way. If women could get over cock and band together, they’d be a force to be reckoned with in their discovery that unified female power can conquer anything and is a long-term solution to rape and the threat of rape. Why do you think hetero-brainwashing is so intense…?
So we come back to the question: is it even possible for women to eradicate female slurs from public usage and consciousness in the way that all racial and ethnic slurs have been tarnished and banned? Women are universally hated and feared – even by themselves! What would have to occur to instill the same cringe factor into even hearing (nevermind using) the words bitch, slut, whore or cunt to take down a woman? As it is, hearing or using those words generally brings power to the user, and I would argue, a feeling of smug satisfaction at denigrating a woman who is the recipient of those slurs. I would further argue that the power and satisfaction are even greater if they are hurled at or heard directed at a white woman.
But let’s get one thing straight. There are more slurs directed at women than any other group in history. And the slurs against women have a longer history than any racial/ethnic slur. Further, slurs against women have carried more damage to women than any racial/ethnic slur has ever had on a racial/ethnic group member. And another thing, all slurs – racial, sexual, religious, anti-gay – were designed and defined by men, the controllers of language. Not women. The origins of all harm lie in men. Use of slurs can bring satisfaction to women, but they benefit men most of all by their continued use.
1) Eliminating Usage of all Slurs and Offensive References
As I said, those who control language hold the power. To be able to change an entire culture’s treatment of your group speaks of massive social, legal, and political power. It is actually quite impressive and astounding how completely racial and religious slurs have been completely removed from English-language entertainment and public usage. I’m so often puzzled at those anti-racism warriors who speak of their lack of power. They live in far-off decades or centuries, methinks. They haven’t performed a modern-day reality check and taken a look at who really has power. And just as important, who really doesn’t. Women of all colours are the powerless. And so many of those ‘oppressed’ men hold massive power over women of all colours. They are often some of the worst perpetrators. How could women possibly go about removing from public and common usage an entire vocabulary of hate that is larger than that any other oppressed group has ever been attacked with? I suspect it is not possible. No group of women has ever had the political, legal, economic, or social power to control language, let alone achieve basic human rights. And I doubt they ever will as long as women keep sleeping with men – those creatures who slur them, demean them and hurt them in the name of love.
2) Criminalizing Usage of Slurs and Offensive References
Men tend to get their pubes in a twist when women even hint at criminalizing male bad behaviour. The idea of women defending themselves and forcing men to be held accountable for their actions is taken as some kind of irrational attack on male ‘rights’. All men believe they have the right to rape, demean, threaten, slur, harass, molest, objectify, and kill women and girls without anyone batting an eye, and to live freely to do it all again the next day. Actual cops have been known to admit that if they prosecuted men for all the horrible things they do to women, most if not all men would be in jail. Racial, anti-gay, and anti-religious crimes are easier to deal with as they are much less common, because men belong to those groups, because these groups are ALLOWED to live separate from oppressors, and because men fight back, while women don’t (and aren’t allowed to anyway). Crimes against women happen all day, every day, to all women. They are so frequent that even the victims accept their victimization as ‘just another day’ or ‘business as usual’ and trudge on burdened by fear, depression, PTSD, and other psychological problems that manifest as pain and debilitating disease. And while sticks and stones break bones, language is still the most powerful weapon out there, able to dehumanize and demoralize. If language didn’t have power, hate speech would never have been created to protect the religious, the non-white, and gay males. As it is, women will never succeed in achieving enough power or respect to warrant protected legal status with regard to hate speech, let alone bodily autonomy.
3) Redefining the Offending Words
I think it is safe to say that anti-woman language isn’t going anywhere. I’m curious to see whether women can achieve what the all-powerful black man has achieved: to take possession of offensive language, redefine it and keep it within their own group, likely to eventually fade away with increasing educational opportunities. To successfully take control of lady-slurs, we’d have to do something to the language to give it the cringe-factor that, say, the word ‘nigger’ produces in all people. For women, this is a near impossible thing to achieve, I believe.
Slut: A small, but vocal, contingent of liberal, white women in Western countries (and the men whose dicks they suck) has tried, but failed, to reclaim the word. While their basic premise is correct – women should not be judged differently from men when it comes to how many or few partners they have – the way they have gone about it has served to hurt white women (not women of colour – white women) and to keep the liberal male agenda securely in place and with more ammunition. You see liberal men, who also want to control women, have told us that our freedom lies in fucking as many of them as possible, and for free!!! The shame lies not in eschewing virtue, but in withholding our pussies from the world, from being prudes! And this small group of young, brainwashed, white women has enthusiastically swallowed this self-serving male agenda and proudly call themselves sluts. And by embracing this male philosophy, men can say that ‘well, women don’t seem to have a problem with the label, so I guess it’s okay, yuk yuk yuk.” Notice that more men will support a slut walk than an anti-pornography protest, and the reason is that a slut walk is as pro-male as the very problem these women think they are fighting, while the latter protest is pro-woman, anti-slavery, anti-violence and at its very core, feminist. I’m not sure that this slur can be repurposed as it cannot be separated from it’s original meaning and to do that, you’d have to end heterosexuality, which would effectively render the slur meaningless and it thus wouldn’t require reclamation.
Whore: Like the word ‘nazi’, this word has become overused and misused through people’s ignorance, rather than effectively repurposed or redefined. ‘Whoring’ yourself in order to get ahead at a traditional job just sounds wrong, and smacks of ignorance and dismissiveness of the sexual slavery women have had to endure since time began. The slanging of the word, thanks to black American men, into ‘ho’, has not helped women at all, but rather, increased its casual, demeaning usage in everyday life. The word, like ‘slut’, was created specifically to hurt women through classification and shaming. I’m not sure that it can be redefined. And when men make demeaning changes or redefinitions to words designed to slur women, it achieves nothing for women. Often quite the opposite.
Bitch: This word wasn’t originally created to slur women, so there may be hope there. There has been some redefinition by women that I would argue isn’t that effective. Calling oneself a ‘bitch’ in a proud sort of way has sometimes come to mean ‘badass’. [Here is a prime example of this usage – skip down half-way through.] I can’t imagine calling myself a bitch in order to convey bravery or guts. Whenever I hear a women use that term to describe herself, there is this weird implication of sluttiness or sexiness that goes with it that is really repulsive. I think it is also a bad idea to retain the word ‘bitch’ to describe a woman who stands up to men because it can still be used by men easily to slur women for behaving normally (i.e., unprogrammed).
I think a good repurposing or redefining of a slur should have at its goal, the fading out of its usage. It should have a definition that men don’t really understand as it isn’t connected to them in a simple and concrete way. If they don’t understand it, they will be less likely to use it (one hopes). And it should also feel bad to women if they use it to describe themselves. It shouldn’t be a source of pride.
The way I understand a bitch (I have redefined it for my own understanding) is as a woman who serves men and male agenda, and who hurts women. The former is actually one of the less common male definitions (a submissive object), but what should be stressed is that a bitch hurts women. These are the women who ditch their female friends for the boyfriend or husband. Women who give birth to sons and make sure they grow up to know their privilege. Women who feminize themselves and their daughters. Women who support marriage. Women who blame and/or don’t believe rape victims. Women who oppose lesbians and asexuals. Women who hate the feminists who fight for their rights. These are bitches.
Most women don’t really think about how they treat other women. They probably can’t articulate that they hate their sisters – except for those clueless, but dangerous, women who say ‘most of my friends are male, and I’ve never really gotten along with women – but they are trained to do so from birth, despite it being a completely unnatural thing. I really believe that if women were made aware of their woman-hate, they would be shocked and might be motivated to self-examine and to change their outlook on sisterhood.
Cunt: This word is much less used than bitch, but it is on the rise. I think it can be repurposed in the same way that bitch can. It is a more extreme version of bitch. A cunt is a woman to purposely tries to hurt other women and girls. A cunt is a mother who abuses her daughter. A woman who turns a blind eye to a daughter-molesting husband, boyfriend or relative deliberately or in willful blindness. A woman who defends a rapist son or family member and heaps blame upon his victims. A woman who holds a girl down while her clitoris is cut off in the name of Allah. A woman who calls herself a feminist, and then in her personal definition of ‘woman’, commits ideological genocide when she tells us only women of colour are women because the percentage of white women in the world ‘isn’t large enough’ (try using that argument with Native Americans when defining ‘person’ or ‘human’ – their percentages are lower than that of white women). Women who physically attack the women their husbands are cheating with instead of getting rid of the husband. These are cunts. Is there any help for these women? Unlike bitches, they are likely aware of their actions and their actions are often deliberate and cruel. There is no excuse for hurting another woman unless she is physically trying to kill you. And I believe in holding attackers accountable. Change has to happen in the language and cognitive processes of all women first. Perhaps, if women become more self-aware, we can eliminate newly-defined words altogether. But really, who knows if women can ever transcend male hate and the internalized woman-hate they are inundated with from birth.
4) Juxtaposition as a Tool to Highlight Misogyny
This is especially relevant for media and entertainment, but can be used in every day conversation. Now, this one would be hard to implement in media simply because it opposes the male and liberal agenda, and thus won’t be allowed to happen. Women don’t run media or entertainment outlets for the most part, and those few that do tend to be liberal and completely on board with male-defined ‘female freedom’ policies. Implementing this experiment in daily life would prove hard and would likely get women killed because misogyny is an accepted part of how the world runs. But just to explore the possibilities, here goes.
For every anti-woman slur or reference made, a racist slur or comment or violence against men must also be made. So when you hear “run like a girl”, which is a nasty way of putting a male down by calling him some sort of subhuman, you must also use “run like a chink”. Or, for example, when the black male character says to the white female police officer, “hey, bitch cop”, she can respond with “hey, nigger rapist” and then shoot him in the head. The anti-black slurs are probably the best to use because blacks have been the most successful oppressed group in gaining political, legal and social power. Slurs against them will stand out immediately in juxtaposition to every anti-woman slur that is used. Where no racial slurs can be used, violence against men can be used. For example, a slur against a woman is used, and a man or boy gets kicked in the head or balls. The point of this exercise is to pair every denigration of women with denigration of a highly respected group (racial, religious, male) to question the necessity of the anti-woman material.
The big risk here is that people are too stupid to get it. Non-whites are respected infinitely more than women and girls. All races and cultures hate women and girls and embrace patriarchy and misogyny. All cultures have only flourished by enslaving females, forcing heterosexuality, and making sure that female persons learn very early in life to hate themselves and to accept abuse. To use racist slurs (or religious slurs or violence against men/boys) to highlight the frequency of anti-woman slurs may not work because stupid people or willfully blind liberal people would likely see the contrast as evidence of racism, anti-semitism or ‘islamophobia’ or ‘manhating’ rather than a highlighting of how much women are hated. Never underestimate how stupid and/or ignorant people are.
Will women ever control language or, at the very least, have enough power to stop male abuse of language and subsequent control of women’s lives?
Upon a great deal of consideration, I conclude that it will never happen as long as women accept and practise heterosexuality. You can’t be pro-women and sleep with the enemy. And if you need evidence, look at how every other oppressed group on the planet has broken free of their circumstances. They don’t live with, sleep with and fuck their oppressor, have their children, coddle their feelings, and support their policies. It really is that simple.
Unlike in English and other languages spoken in Western countries, there is no word for ‘racist’ or ‘racism’ in Chinese. There is a cobbling together of characters to form the following phrasal options:
种族主义者 – which roughly translates to one who righteously serves as lord and master breeder of one’s race/clan. If you plug it into a translator, you get ‘racist’ on the English end. But it is not clear for me whether this has a negative connotation if used to describe someone. Whereas ‘racist’ in Western languages has nothing other than a direct, negative meaning, in Chinese, I would strongly suspect that it doesn’t. Race supremacy is strong in China. It is something to be proud of. They do not like mixing the gene pool, but they often barely tolerate physical proximity to non-Chinese (unless they are sexually assaulting a white female) or mixing outside their cultural circles when they emigrate.
民族主义 – not a single word, but a phrase that refers to the first important principle of the thinking of Dr. Sun Yat Sen (the father of modern communist China). It is kind of like nationalism, but it also can be roughly translated as something like racism – an equation which makes sense in a monoracial, monoculture or country as race and culture are kind of inseparable. Nationalism can exist in multiracial countries, but it isn’t so much race as culture that is being used as the prejudicial segregation or exclusionary criterion.
The lack of a single word to designate ‘racist’ as a negative term also makes sense to me having lived in China for the better part of a decade and learning early on that there isn’t a single shameful or monstrous behaviour or event in Chinese history for which they take responsibility or over which they feel shame/guilt. Seriously, over the years, I’ve had numerous conversations with people of all ages and parts of the country, and there is no shame or guilt for anything. Depravity is swept under the carpet and not talked about, or there is fierce denial. I was once ganged up on by a group of educated Chinese who mansplained and Chinasplained to me that a) the racist-sexist violence I have experienced never happened, and that b) Chinese people aren’t racist – they are shy and curious. Um, yeah…
There is one major exception to the feeling of shame and guilt – it is that which is present in most young people thanks to their parents and that is a crucial part of the brainwashing into the version of mandatory heterosexuality and breeding that you see here today. It is standard procedure to make sure one’s children know that they are a huge burden on their parents. Most young people are wracked with tear-producing guilt (seriously!) about their very existence and know full well that the pound of flesh will be taken when they are older. But that is it. Individuals may have their own specific neuroses, but as a culture, the Chinese have clean hands and consciences. Conversely, though, they are the most impressive faux-victims I’ve ever met (except for men from any and all cultures and ages). In all of the disputes they have with a whole pile of countries, they are the victims. Righto.
It’s mind-boggling to me as a Canadian, to be honest. I’ve had Western shame hammered into me all my life for things I haven’t done, that didn’t happen in my lifetime, that didn’t happen in my country or by my compatriots, and that men from eras past have initiated, maintained, and forced women to participate in via hetero slavery. There is also the shame all women are brainwashed to feel from birth about being female, guilt for being female and having needs, and that lady-shame-and-guilt can often co-mingle with the general Western shame to produce a paralyzing, messy mindfuck of a state. Shame and guilt, for me, are truly second nature and have actually become so psychologically crippling that I’m finally trying to deprogram myself. It’s quite fascinating once you start examining brainwashing mechanisms and how they have turned you into a person who has learned how to negate true, personal victimization experiences because you have been told over and over that everyone absolutely has it worse than you, apparently, and it is your fault somehow, and this manages to diminish your pain and injuries and serious tragedies. It also turns you into a woman who feels she deserves nothing good in life because everything is your fault, and you end up sabotaging opportunities as a way of punishing yourself. Your life ends up being a lot worse than those of so many of the people that supposedly have it worse than you. So, my point is to meet people who don’t have shame and guilt beaten into them for things that have nothing to do with them (and often even for things they are directly responsible for) is truly bizarre.
So, the last two months have been incredibly busy and risky and expensive as I am actively on the look out for somewhere to move and work next year. Somewhere that is not China, and not Asia. I visited four countries to talk to immigrants and local people, find out about job markets, and just get a general ‘vibe’ of the places. It might sound unscientific, but my gut and inbuilt vibe-detector seldom steer me wrong. I can sense, underlying societal misery, nastiness, violence or aggression, happiness, carefreeness, community, civility, etc, etc, usually within a day of being in a place – sometimes within moments. And it is not often that my first impression of a place changes with more experience. Occasionally, there are surprises, but not usually. But I won’t get into that so much here. There really is much more to write about, and some of it will make it into posts. I want to mull on the fact that AGAIN I was assaulted by a Muslim Arab male – luckily, not a rape or an attempted murder like my other experiences (although I could have easily been maimed or killed through his actions – and all of this while his lady-slave looked on apathetically) , but it was still aggressive, racist, sexist, and shit-scary. And I want to talk about it because of course, we are not allowed to talk about Muslim racist-sexist terrorism against white women. We have a serious problem, and nobody wants to address it, name it correctly, and do something about it.
As well, during my time away, I met a few, although not quite enough sadly, excellent people who were thought-provoking. But, it was a hard journey all in all, and although I was dreading to return to China, I actually felt ready to get back to my regular job and have started trying to line up some possible part-time job interviews so I can earn slightly more money, scrimp and save, and get the hell out of here for good.
I got back and what was waiting for me? Well, the brutally hot weather first and foremost. Then there was the aggressive, and sometimes violent, over-crowding conditions on public transit that you only really see in overpopulated places like China or India. But what was it I missed the most?
And I wasn’t disappointed. I got back to my campus where I live. It was 37°C (about 99F), and I was dressed for about 20°C (about 68F). I was exhausted and carrying some moderate-weight gear. I’ve lived at this campus for over 4 years. I am the only white female there. I stand out and not in a good way. I experience a lot of racism every time I step out of my apartment. Neighbours still cringe against the wall if they have to pass me in the stairwell. I cannot go out in anonymity. Ever. So when I got to the gate beside the staff accommodation, all I could think about was stripping down, dumping the gear and guzzling cold water. But no. The guard at the gate wouldn’t let me in. Demanding to know who I was. Yelling. Now, notice that I am a resident there. Frequently, people who DON’T live there enter and walk around our campus, never checked or turned away. Delivery dudes on motorcycles sometimes have to sign in. But generally, if you are Chinese, you are free to do as you please. And none of these Chinese was accosted today either. But I am not Chinese. Not human. I was treated like a criminal instead of a university lecturer, which, although seriously underpaid, still demands some respect in this country.
I ignored that racist fucker – mostly because I was too hot, tired and overburdened to defend myself in the step-and-fetch / dancing monkey way that all Western people are expected to adopt in order to keep the mood light and let the Chinese know they are in charge and can continue to feel superior. I also wasn’t in any mood or state to consider that he could physically attack me and no one would defend me. I just kept moving, and I think it was the fact that he was just not used to that kind of defiance and didn’t know what to do that I got away and headed quickly to my residence without looking back. I don’t know what I’ll have to deal with tomorrow as I go out and come back from a small shopping trip to the market. He might be more prepared to deal with the ‘white devil’ (racial slur used here). I really don’t want to have to deal with violence.
Outcast: a person who has been rejected or ostracized by their society or social group.
We are taught that balance is a good thing. And, for the most part, I’d agree with that. In many areas of life, moderation – a sister of balance – keeps you healthy. Don’t eat too much of one thing and make sure you get a little of all the vitamins. Don’t sleep too little or too much. Overexercise will injure you, but doing nothing will destroy your health. Don’t work too much or play too hard. Etc.
Achieving balance or moderation is a matter of compromise, in my opinion. And we compromise constantly to maintain a healthy lifestyle. But is compromise, moderation or balance always a good thing? I’d argue that no, it is not. Sometimes, compromise is an attack on your convictions or beliefs. To compromise on what you believe, is, in my opinion, to live a lie. This is counter to what almost every person in every society on the planet will tell you. Compromise is the key to getting along in society; the key to relationship maintenance. If you are a moderate, non-thinking sort of person (sorry, I find that those people who are best liked and most popular tend not to have much to say on anything and don’t think too deeply about issues or righting wrongs), you do just fine. It is easy for this kind of person to compromise because they are not deeply invested in anything except not rocking the boat. To compromise, they really aren’t giving up anything important. When you won’t compromise on your beliefs, you find yourself slipping farther away from mainstream society, until you realize you are an outcast. And it really doesn’t take much to become an outcast. Imagine what happens if you even hint that men are the cause of 99.9% of the violence in our world, and that things would be better if they didn’t exist… In some places, that kind of heretical thinking might get you killed, nevermind outcast status.
I’ll come back to that.
So, I’ve been offline for about a month. Not just a ‘not writing’ kind of offline, but I went so far as to make my site private. Apologies if you came by only to find yourself barred access. I’m back online, now. You see, I found myself at a fork in the road. Not an unusual occurrence. I frequently assess my life and decisions, and this occasions a pause while I figure out what to do. For the most part, I’m an all-or-none kinda gal. I try to maintain balance in certain areas of my life – I have achieved ‘balance self-awareness’, but seldom balance itself. It’s a struggle. But I’ve come to see that there are situations where balance (aka ‘compromise’) is just not a good thing at all. For me. It has made me an outcast. I do have friends, but I’m not sure that there are more than one or two people with whom I can have a truly honest conversation about uncomfortable stuff. Most of my relationships are based on compromise – or lies. I suppose this is normal. Each person in your life serves a different function. Is requiring all friends to have a working knowledge of gardening any different than requiring all friends to be able to talk to you in depth about patriarchy or to be 100% truthful about beliefs? I don’t know; I understand less and less about what friendship is supposed to be the older I get. But blogging is not a relationship, so the idea of writing publicly without speaking truth makes no sense to me. Why have a blog if you write bullshit you don’t believe just to please the faceless masses?
Funnily enough, I have spent most of my life, working in service-based jobs – work based on helping and relating to humans. I’ve spent many years teaching. But I’ve done other service-related jobs as well. I’ve always wondered why dealing with people steals so much of my energy, even though I do get a certain amount of pleasure from helping people. The latter I think is due to the lady-brainwashing that is forced on all girls from birth – we exist to serve, and we take our happiness from making others happy. Gawd, how many times have I heard a woman parrot those mantras, and I note how I’ve never heard it from a male (since they exist to take, steal, use and destroy rather than serve). The energy sapping part of my work in service is partly due to being an introvert, but a lot of it, I think, is that I have to present a facade in order to do the job well. I have to hide so much of who I am in order to deal with people, in order to make them feel comfortable. But this is how I earn my pittance. It is ‘work’. Blogging is a leisure activity, and it should be to please myself, yes?
So as I set my blog to private and began to contemplate whether to continue, I asked myself how I had gotten to this point. I suppose being aware of what is happening in the world brings me down. Sometimes, being aware of the fact that I will never live in a world where I or any other female is free is depressing. Sometimes, knowing that I can never fit into a feminist community because I don’t compromise in order to please liberal agendas puts a damper on my writing activities. And on this particular occasion, the awareness that my blog is becoming more and more popular with men (I logically assume) who are looking for videos of white women being raped by Muslims and/or Arabs kind of kills my soul. The search terms used to find my site – and every woman who writes publicly has the same experience – confirm to me that men as a class are pure, dangerous, rapey filth. And so, as all of these realizations build up and fester, I wonder what the point of writing is. And that’s what was going on.
But examining purpose is a good thing, and I brought myself back. I realized it is important for me to keep writing and to remember why I started writing in the first place. Heck, I set out my purpose in my ‘About‘ page. The mission never changed and is still the same. Perhaps I need to read it more often and remind myself of who I am. I also realized I am under no illusion that I’ll ever be part of even a non-mainstream feminist community, which is okay. So, I’m not writing to make friends or be a part of something officially. The purpose of my writing is two-fold. First, I write to get stuff out. Some feminists pooh-pooh blogs that relate personal stuff. I’m not one of those. I think it is important for feminists to talk about their experiences and to express themselves in whatever way works for them (writing, speaking, painting, sculpting, dance, etc.) and it is important to read about other women’s experiences. If you want an ‘academic’ or ‘clinical’ feminist blog, have at it. I read some of those too. Myself, I’m a mix. Not all of my posts are navel-gazing (like this one), but they are there. And I tell you this month of not writing has been torture, to be honest. The impulse has been there and very demanding, but I didn’t allow myself to do it – not even non-feminist content. And getting back to it, and being aware of the sensations that accompany it, I can say that I write to cleanse my brain and take joy from the writing process.
My second purpose is that I write because I know how important it is to have stuff to read and think about when you are a budding feminist looking for answers or paths to pursue. And it is good to have a variety of things to read, even things you don’t agree with. I remember back when I was reading everything I could get my eyes on. Reading different viewpoints helped me understand and clarify what I, myself, believed. I especially enjoyed reading things that challenged me or made me angry. I have no doubt that I write things that make people annoyed or uncomfortable or pissed off, and that is good. I don’t write for feedback on this as I have enough stress in my life without backlash adding to it all. I just know I can be provocative and that is enough. Only in that way can people understand themselves better and to know that there are a variety of viewpoints and experiences. We are all ignorant beings, and anything different we encounter chips away at that ignorance and makes us think (hopefully). Although not a primary goal, if my writing manages to convince a feminist-in-the-making (or even an experienced feminist that doesn’t realise she is actually supporting the patriarchy) that her actions don’t exist in a vacuum, that is cake.
So, I continue to write. I’m back, and I may churn out some controversial posts in the future. What the hell is the point, otherwise? I’m already an outcast, and the ethical gymnastics required for me to be able to compromise and get along with the mainstreamers at this point would hurt me more than help me. I support female freedom, but feminism really is still in its infancy and women – even feminists – have completely internalized woman-hate despite what they may say. As such, feminist communities are fragile and volatile things. As I’ve witnessed online many a time, women aren’t yet at a point where they will unconditionally support one another. One wrong word, and fellow feminists who had your back suddenly attack you and beat you to death. No thanks. I’m okay with my one-woman show, writing what I truly believe, not giving a shit who disagrees with me, and reading a select group of fierce women who also persist without ideological compromise.
This post consists of some background to my most recent survey on rape, which is still open to participants (click the button below):
The survey was designed to explore people’s understanding of and beliefs about rape. The content of the survey was drawn from collected data and research, a wide range of reported personal experiences, news stories, and myths and propaganda propagated through various entertainment outlets. If you plan to take the survey – and it would be immensely appreciated if you did – please click through before reading further. My personal views are not important to the survey, and I don’t wish them to colour participant responses.
After years of thinking and examination of the number one influence on and limitation to my existence as a girl first, and later, a woman, I have to conclude that any discussion or consideration of rape must begin with a discussion of language. Indeed, any thinking on hierarchy, power dynamics or control mechanisms (which is where rape finds its roots) must take into account the role of language.
Humans vs. All Other Creatures
In considering the differences between humans and other mammals or any creature for that matter, there are some significant differences that set us apart. And note that this is in no way a comment that humans are superior to animals, as I don’t believe that for a second. Each species has its strengths and weaknesses, which makes hierarchy-development a rather stupid and pointless endeavour. In considering humans, language and the capacity for deep and complex self-awareness set them apart from all other living things on earth. Other creatures may have systems of communication and a limited ability to reflect on simple behaviours, but none rivals human capacity. That is not a judgment, just a fact. Dolphins don’t conjugate verbs and chimpanzees don’t chronically and masochistically self-sabotage or even commit suicide over lack of purpose or meaning in life. Non-humans also don’t develop systems of ethics or morality – even misguided, faulty ones. These are uniquely human ‘achievements’ and are only three of many, many examples of the complexities of human language and self-awareness.
Humans are also the only species capable of malice. Now, note that I am not talking about survival instincts. Men and silly women who defend men often argue that male violence is just a reflection of the instinct to survive and is comparable to the killing that any other species does. This is classic male logic designed specifically to try to justify violent male behaviour. Some of my Chinese male university students will state without blinking that we ‘live in a jungle’. Now, I do believe that males are naturally violent. They are wired for it. But as I’ve written before, as humans, we also have self-awareness, and it is this unique and incredible ability that allows humans to override violent impulses. But, as humans are also uniquely malicious creatures, instinct and deliberate cruelty frequently play off each other. No creature other than the human (male) kills for pleasure. And no creature other than the human (male) tortures other living things. There is no evolutionary or ‘survival’ purpose for killing for pleasure or for torturing. I’ve met a lot of men who try to argue with seriously twisted logic that there is a need for these things. This is when I back away, and wish I had a weapon at the ready in order to do like all other creatures do out of instinct – remove a dangerous threat to one’s survival. But, alas, human females are the only creatures on earth who are NOT allowed to defend themselves.
And this is where language enters the scene.
The Role of Language in Power, Control and Hierarchy
The pen is mightier than the sword.
Language is one of human’s oldest tools. Like all tools, it can be a beautiful mechanism or system used to do wonderful things and inspire the best in all of us. But like all tools, it can also be used to destroy everything in its path. In the hands of men, language is frequently used to express male ‘love’ and ‘creativity’, which as most women eventually come to find out, are dangerous things and not at all what female love and creativity are.
As human males have come to realize, weapons alone will not get you sustainable power. Sure, you can overwhelm a perceived enemy, but it is really difficult to maintain that victory for any period of time without a much more powerful weapon. That weapon is language. Language is, in fact, a much more powerful weapon than any ‘sword’. But they work together. Just as it is hard to sustain control with only swords, it is also difficult to gain and keep power with only words. We’ve all heard that common description of successful evil dynamic duos: ‘You have the brawn and I have the brains’ (cue the Pet Shop Boys here…). Well, that is an apt description of the sword and the pen. Employ the brute force, overwhelm the enemy, enact the mindfuckery of the brutalized population that only language can achieve (e.g., “War is Peace. Freedom is Slavery. Ignorance is Strength.”), and then all future brutality just becomes an accepted part of the system. Those few who see beyond the language mechanisms and refuse to believe have no leg to stand on, and find themselves very much alone and often questioning their own sanity.
Whoever Controls Language Controls the World
As a tool and building block of control and power, it is safe to say that if you aspire to megalomaniac status, you need to master language. I don’t mean that you should learn to speak several languages. I mean you need to learn how to use language to manipulate people and situations, and to obscure facts. You need to weaponize language. You need to see where language has its greatest influence. My Oppressor Triangle discusses a few major centres of influence, but there are other arenas. Language has had its greatest influence in the areas of politics, law, economics, academia, and the health care system (industry). These areas don’t function separately. There is much overlap. The language enacted in the political sphere can and does affect all other spheres of power, for example.
The question becomes: who controls language? And the answer is: men. Men have always controlled language. And they control it as much today as they have in the past. It’s not a race thing, as much as some people might wish it to be so. It is a MALE thing. If you are a big picture thinker, if you think internationally across time and place – and really, you have to be if you are ever to hope of ending oppression – you have to accept the truth that males control language, and as a result, they control everything. If you get bogged down on other group affiliations, you’ll change nothing. Only the truth can set you (and everyone else) free.
How do we know that males control language, and as a result, the world? It’s pretty easy. You have to take an overarching look at lifestyle and living conditions and determine who overwhelmingly benefits and who overwhelmingly is denied choices and freedoms. Look at any country. It is the same no matter which country you look at and no matter which race is being considered. Who is the poorest group? Females. Look at any field of research: who is studied meticulously and who benefits from the research? Males. Look at entertainment in any country. Who makes the most money, and who is hired based on talent rather than physical attributes? Males. Who is human trafficked most often? Females. Whose social justice complaints actually make progress? Males of all races and orientations. Who receives the poorest health care, and the most needless and harmful surgeries? Females. Who has been hurt most by the field of psychiatry? Females. Whose bodies and decisions about bodies are controlled by the state and institutions like religion and marriage? Females. Who is barred from politics, employment, education, and safety on a regular basis? Females.
And more. So much more.
There are data to back up each of these. Easy to find. Google, government web sites, academic journals. I’m not doing that here. This is not an academic journal article. And it is tedious to state and restate everything that has been said by women a million times before. What I find important here is the theory that it is language and the control of language that facilitates control on every other level.
Language and Rape
Men have been raping, torturing and killing women since they realized they could. It has nothing to do with evolution or survival. Any man who tells you that it does is dangerous and you should get away from him before he hurts you.
Male control of language has had its greatest impact on the one thing that has allowed them to maintain control over women. Rape. Without rape, men don’t have a hold over women. Control the language surrounding rape, and you control the crime itself – or whether it is even considered a crime, or who can commit it, or who is responsible, or who can be raped. We know that women have no power, and certainly have no control over language, because rape is so rampant and that they are on the receiving end with little ability to avoid it or seek justice for it.
It is only relatively recently that rape was even considered a crime, and only extremely recently that rape was considered to be a form of torture. In Western cultures, the rape of a woman was considered to be a crime against the man who owned her. And it could only be committed by a male who did not own her. She herself, as a rape victim, was deemed dirtied, rendered an embarrassment, and often tossed out like so much garbage from family and community. Even today, rape victims often end up in prostitution or suffering from mental health problems that leave them unable to self-actualize, let alone take care of themselves properly. The propaganda and brainwashing campaign that all societies provide to women to get them to accept rape as reality, as normal, often succeeds in neutralizing female protest to unlivable conditions. Rape is a crucial part of Western entertainment – drama as well as comedy – although Western men are not alone in their enjoyment of female torture. Many women will suppress their experiences or deny that rape even happened. Rape victims who don’t follow the rules are often punished by society, and frequently by other women who prefer to lash out at other women than to name the real problem.
In non-Western countries, rape has gone through equally horrible control by men. In some countries, raping girl children isn’t considered rape. Elsewhere, rape cannot occur within a marriage or family. In others, rape has only occurred if a woman can get a handful of male witnesses to support her claim. No, women aren’t in control of language at all. Anywhere in the world. I mean, no woman would ever set up the linguistic, social and legal hoops/barriers to proving rape that are currently in place in every corner of the earth. We aren’t that masochistic or stupid of our own free will.
Men Can Be Raped, Toooooooo!
Likely, in response to women calling more attention to rape and violence against women, men retaliated. Men always retaliate. They are allowed. There are always repercussions to women gaining even an ounce of freedom or power or justice. And language is always at the centre of any retaliation. And there is always violence to back it up.
So recently, men decided to change the language surrounding rape. They decided that rape no longer meant ‘male forcibly entering a female through her vagina using his dick’. Suddenly, males could be raped! And further, women could be rapists!
These revelations served a very, very important purpose. You see, if you can show that a crime or negative circumstance ALSO affects men, it is no longer a sex-based inequality or a hate crime. Men no longer are forced to be held responsible. Men are no longer predators. They are no longer deficient in some way. If you can show that they suffer tooooo or that women are doing the same evil deeds tooooo, then men no longer will be examined as the sole source of a major problem or epidemic. Once males can name themselves as victims, all focus can ‘justifiably’ be removed from women and recentred on men and boys. All we need is one male victim to negate the suffering of millions of women. And all we need is one female predator to negate the predation of millions of males. That is the male control of language at work. Change one word or one definition, and you can change the lives of millions. Control is regained.
Predictably, women got on board with the rebranding of rape, as they usually do when males find new ways to name themselves as victims, to detract from female victims, and to blame women for something. Women are usually the first ones on board with helping men hurt women. And men are experts at painting themselves as victims and martyrs.
Rape, in the minds of many, now also means a woman ‘forces’ a male to pop a boner and stick it to her. And strangely, rape now also means a dick forcibly entering an anus. But the thing is this, even if the former is forced, it is not rape. It may be a sexual assault, and if so, it needs to have its own label. The latter is NOT RAPE. It actually already has its own label. It is called forcible sodomy. Women are also frequently forcibly sodomized by men, more often than men are forcibly sodomized by men, and often in addition to being raped. But ignoring and/or broadening existing definitions has achieved its goal. We’ve taken the focus off what men do to women. And sex crimes are no longer seen primarily as the domain of male perps. Congratulations men and the dangerous women who support them.
Letting Victims Define Crimes
I wrote a short piece in the past on the problem of letting perpetrators define their crimes. Interestingly, it is only with male violence against women that this is allowed. As in my example in that previous post demonstrates, it sounds ridiculous say, to allow a thief to define his crime. But we don’t bat an eye when men get to define crimes against female bodies.
Women need to be allowed to define the crimes against them. As it is, so many victims fall through the cracks because currently, men define what happens to women. Men control women’s and girls’ bodies, and that is a serious issue.
There are several problems with how we deal with rape and sexual assault – besides our unwillingness to name men as the primary perpetrators of sex crimes and the sole perpetrators of rape. One is that we don’t have enough clearly defined categories of crimes. We also have too many barriers to victims coming forward. And finally, our punishment system is inadequate and doesn’t take into account that a) crimes against women are hate crimes, and b) men who commit sex crimes are more likely to commit again than any other type of criminal, even after being ‘punished’ (i.e., no man ever, ever, ever rapes once). Personally, I want all rape, sexual assault, torture and murder of women/girls by men punished by death. This has nothing to do with deterrence (which we know doesn’t work), or revenge (which is a male ‘logic’ thing), but everything to do with protecting future victims. It does not make sense that victims and potential victims have fewer rights and considerations and access to safety than hate-crime-sex criminals. In other words, only a dead rapist can’t rape again.
Other things to consider:
- Many women don’t report rape if their attacker is seen as ‘at risk’ or ‘vulnerable’. This includes non-white men, immigrant men, homeless men, disabled men, unemployed men, etc. It is a mixture of fear and compassion that drives women to negate their victimhood and protect their attacker.
- The burden of proof should be on the perpetrators, not the victims. Men should have to prove that they did not rape. In no other crime is the burden of proof on the victim. This exists ONLY because rape is a sex-specific hate crime committed by MEN against WOMEN, where males, who are in control of language, get to define the crimes they commit. Rape is the only crime where all the perps are male and all the victims are female. And men don’t want to take responsibility or stop raping. This needs to change.
- Consent has always been a problematic issue. It is rooted in property disputes. Bodies should not be seen as property. Further, in no place on earth do women come to the table on equal footing with men, and as such, they cannot give free and equal consent in any agreement with a male.
- Orgasms are erroneously seen as evidence of consent thanks to 2-dimensional male thinking on sex. Females are trained from birth to see servitude as a duty and a pleasurable activity. Orgasm has nothing to do with acceptance or lack of coercion.
- Many people believe that rape must involve weapons or threat of bodily harm in order to be considered rape. I’d argue that most rape is of the coercive or manipulative variety. I’d bet all of Donald Trump’s money that almost all women have ‘sex’ with the men in their lives (including husbands) because they fear abandonment, rejection, cheating, emotional and physical beatings, etc. All women know on some level that male love can turn on a dime if they don’t live up to the constantly changing expectations.
- Male children are born with a weapon – their penises. They learn about how to weaponize their dicks early in life thanks to parents, television/film, porn, and school. I’d argue that if they are using their dicks as weapons, then they need to be treated as dangerous. Sex predators never stop. I don’t have a problem with killing sex predators who are children – innocent child, my ass. And I also have no problem with holding mothers and fathers responsible for the crimes of their boy children. Rape destroys girls’ lives. No girl ever ‘gets over it’. I know I’m nearly alone in wanting boy sex predators eliminated from existence, but you’re deluded if you think predators are ‘born’ in adulthood out of nothing.
- I think statutory rape needs to be rethought. It’s not that I believe that girls are capable of free and equal consent with a boy the same age. No female of any age is ever on equal footing with a male of any age. This one is a hard one for me though. It saddens me that children are fucking. I truly wish girls were kept separate from boys for the duration of their childhoods so as not to have opportunities, educations and futures destroyed by the straight mandate and public school crash course in fuckholery and blowjobbery. One final note: Adult males who fuck girl children and teenagers need to be shot. Period.
- ‘Sex workers’ / porn actresses – paid sex is rape as far as I’m concerned. There is a lot of disagreement on this. And people get mighty pissed when a feminist suggests that sex work is abuse, not work. Abused people often lash out and get defensive when they feel attacked (even if they are not being attacked, but rather someone is trying to help them). All I can say is that women would not sell their bodies if men didn’t exist. It is almost always done out of desperation and/or resulting from childhood sex abuse. These are the conditions that make rape easy peasy to dress up as legit in a capitalist, male-serving society.
- Drugs and alcohol are convenient get-out-of-jail cards for men, and eternal damners of women. It is no coincidence that males joke about helping women relax with a drink. ‘No inhibitions’ is just man-speak for ‘no credible defense’ in a rape trial.
This really is a huge issue. So much more could be written. But it is some background to my survey. Again, if you wish to participate and let your thoughts be known, it would be very much appreciated. The link to the survey is below.
I’ve always found a bit of comfort in writing. When my ESL students ask me how to improve their English vocabulary, I tell them to read and write as much as possible. But there are so many more benefits to writing. You can work through issues or confusion in your mind. It gives you a distracting focus. You can get bottled-up emotion out. I don’t usually tell students this. They don’t seem to care about that stuff.
Anyhow, it is a bad day. I made the mistake of leaving my apartment at 7:30 this morning to go to the market to buy vegetables. Why was this a mistake, you might ask? Seems like a pretty routine, innocuous thing to do. Yeah, it is perhaps. But for me, it is frequently dangerous. Leaving my apartment is anxiety-provoking to me. It often takes some time to psych myself up, and I only go out when it is absolutely necessary.
Do I live in a war zone? Well, in a sense, I’ve come to see it as such. In the traditional sense of the word, it isn’t. But I’m frequently physically assaulted, especially in my own neighbourhood. Sometimes, I’m sexually assaulted. Frequently, intimidated or given the Chinese version of sexual harassment. I’ve requested a transfer to another of our university campuses several times, now, and I am always denied despite declines in my health and increased frequency of assault over the last 4 years.
Today, walking back from the market, I was hit. I was hit, and when I protested, I was tripped, and a few more people joined in to yell at me. Everything was my fault. I hurried back to the safety of my cage (apartment) in hysterics, completely terrorized, clutching my bag of carrots and green beans. I hadn’t cried in several months, despite several assaults having taken place, and my fear and rage and depression had built up and I couldn’t stop for a long time. I have no easily accessible adult people in my life to talk to anymore , so I decided to write.
The worst part of it was that it was a woman who did it. Most of the physical assaults on my body are committed by Chinese women. Men seldom hit me. Men do almost all the sexual stuff to me, and only occasionally hit me – only the last serious sexual assault I experienced was done by a Chinese woman with a lot of power over non-Chinese, and she did it publicly in front of about 100 Chinese people, perhaps to make an example of me. But the violent ones, the ones who knock me over; the ones who see me and deliberately cross the empty road in order to smash into me; the ones who trip me; the ones who call me ‘strange’, who criticize my appearance; who whisper and point and laugh at me; the ones who push me out of the way so they can steal the bus seat I’m lowering myself into – they are all women. It hurts me. Sometimes it is physical hurt in addition to the psychological hurt. But it always hurts. It really hurts because I constantly help Chinese women, even many I don’t know, with all sorts of stuff. I help Chinese women more than Chinese women help Chinese women (relationships between women in a traditional culture is a post for another time) I feel terrified. I feel betrayed. My depression deepens.
The second worst part of it is that every time I am assaulted because of my sex and race, I am reminded that no one will believe me or support me. I am alone in so many senses. I read so many feminists who screech that white women don’t experience racism. It’s an incorrect belief based on a pro-male agenda. White women are gaslighted and shamed and driven off and out of communities if we try to talk about our experiences, and assaults, and rapes, and abuse by non-white women and men. I firmly believe that all women experience racism in addition to misogyny. They often go together. Many people fail to understand that racism is not a dichotomy, not so easy to describe as misogyny. Many people also fail to understand that racism is borne of woman-hate. Without woman hate, you don’t have racism. Further, racism wasn’t created by white people, it was created by men – and much longer ago than people think – before white people even existed in their current manifestation. The first time a tribe encountered another tribe with different skin colouring, culture, beliefs and customs, the males ‘othered’ them so as to protect the cunts and uteri of ‘their’ women. Men determined (still do) who got to use women’s bodies. To keep the bloodlines pure and to keep firm control over women. As time has gone on, and as the world has become more populated and races come into contact with one another on a more regular basis, the original intentions remain true. The manifestations become more varied and complex. But all races are racist, all men seek to protect the cunts of their group, even if they don’t realize that that is what they are doing. That is how it started and how it continues to be fuelled. And owned women have followed the men doing their part to maintain approval and fail to bond with ‘other’ women who actually have more in common with them than any man does. Monocultures are still much more racist than multicultures because the ‘others’ who do exist in them don’t have a voice or legal rights or often don’t exist in the numbers necessary to gain attention. No one is required to take responsibility. And no one is culpable (except the other). In monocultures, the majority is free to do what they wish. And like in my experience today (and every time, for that matter), locals support the violent abuser instead of the victim because it is easier. When people talk about how racist Western countries are, they really have no idea about what goes on anywhere else or even outside their small circles. Many of the loudest dismiss or ignore data from real live people that demand that pet theories be questioned. They often nestle these theories in decades or centuries long gone by and try to use them to explain situations that don’t really exist anymore. These days, nobody in the West gets hit and abused almost every time they go to the shops because of their race. Most people will protect and fight for victims of racism (unless the victims are white). They may experience other constant threats (i.e., living in the middle of gangland, or a domestic abuse situation, or trapped in the prostitution downward spiral), but that is not racism (though they are not necessarily mutually exclusive).
I really want to escape China. I live in a constant state of holding my emotions in check, and bottling up my fear in order to eat and go to my workplace, and wondering whether I’m going to end up dying here because of racist, misogynist brutality. But it is not so easy to leave when you’ve been gone from your home for so long that you have no safety net, no one to help you, no where to go. No family, few friends or connections. Very little money. No job prospects.
Unfortunately, I have to go out again today, and I’m dreading it. I never know what is going to happen to me – only that something will happen.
Preamble to the Survey
In the past, I designed and offered up a Super-Fun Quiz™ on feminism dilution, which remains open to this day (read the prelim post first and follow the link at the bottom after). It was casually designed, and not intended for serious data analysis. The tool itself was inadequate for design/measurement purposes, and besides, I didn’t vet or validate the quiz first. But it is certainly useful for introspection or further thinking on topics. At least it was for me. And it was from the results of this quiz, that I got to thinking about designing a second, more specific, survey. It became apparent to me that people have some really disturbing or unclear ideas about rape. The quiz wasn’t designed to look at that specifically, but there was one question that addressed one element of the most serious issue facing every single woman on the planet. I mean, really, rape is the single-most important and influential reason our planet is speeding towards death on several levels. Without rape, things would be unimaginably different. Rape affects not only the lives of women, but trickles down to affect every aspect of human life, animal life, and the environment. It is hard for most people to understand that, and see the connection between the primary mechanism of female subjugation and the destruction of the planet, but examination with open eyes and honesty shows that it is true. Anyhow, I wanted to explore ideas about rape.
So, out came my methodologist’s cap, and I’ve set to designing prodding questions on this single topic. It is a survey, rather than a quiz. You won’t be scoring yourself on ‘rape knowledge’. I’m collecting data for further thinking and further writing, that’s all. In the past, I did work professionally in research on serial rape and workplace violent crime, but this survey is not destined for publication other than on my blog.
If you intend to take the survey, the link is below. I’m going to discuss my own views in the next post as I’d prefer your views not to be coloured by my opinions. I’d appreciate your participation. I was thrilled to have had a great turn-out for the last quiz, and to be honest, I’m much more interested in this current survey, so your opinions are of value to me. Please be assured that the survey is anonymous. Polldaddy collates country respondent information, but that’s all that is provided to me.
There isn’t a single culture on this earth where males don’t lust after and pursue the objectification, assault, and rape of little girls. Pedophelia is built into all religions, condoned by all systems of government, and is practised by all racial and ethnic groups in every country in the world. It has been practised, often in a publicly sanctioned way, since time began. I’ve written before that there really is no such thing in males or females as natural ‘heterosexuality’. I’d extend that, in males, to human-oriented sexuality. Males are attracted to anything that they can envision will accommodate their dicks. It can be a living thing or an inanimate object. It can be natural or man-made. It can be human or animal. And among humans, there really is no difference for men between adults and children except where lame attempts have been made to set up guidelines on which humans can be raped by men with impunity. All this is to say that all men have a variety of lusts in them, including towards children (especially girl children). It’s just that some men hide these lusts better than others, and some are more successfully conditioned to react negatively to children as sexual stimuli. Conditioning doesn’t erase pedophilic tendencies, mind you.
Every culture on the planet has a pedophilic underbelly and often, an above-ground set of bizarre, but unquestioned, rituals, designed to prepare girl children for use by males of all ages. And that same system reinforces this brainwashing by putting into the heads of adult women that their value increases if they, too, pursue youthful appearances and behaviours. Some rituals are common across time and place, but each culture has its set of weird shit that is forced upon women and girls to prepare them for use by males. And as adult females pursue their return to a ‘jail bait’ state, they further serve as examples to girls. And sad to say, but mothers are the number one enforcers of female slave behaviour in their daughters. Very few girls escape having an infantilized and acquiescing sex slave as a role model in their childhood homes.
It is no coincidence that feminization goes hand in hand with infantilization. Feminization has nothing to do with this fabled ‘sexual power’ that men tell us we have (the power to inspire boners). No, sexual power is held solely by men – it is the power to rape, among other male sexual privileges. Rather, feminization is the reduction of a female to a powerless, submissive, sexualized, objectified state. Infantilization is the reduction of a person to a powerless, submissive, child-like state. In females, they are essentially the same thing, and you only need to do one to make the other easier to achieve. An infantilized adult woman would seem more feminine. And a feminized adult woman would seem more infantilized. Imagine how difficult it is to infantilize a butch lesbian, for example – it’s difficult because she is not feminizing herself or allowing anyone to feminize her. The woman who cannot be infantilized / feminized is very threatening to men and women who serve men. She refuses to be owned.
[A note on emasculation. ‘Emasculation’ – which is something men complain about, but really isn’t a thing – is the male reaction to a woman who challenges his perceived right to dominate and/or rape women. Men can only be ’emasculated’ if they believe they are naturally superior to women and believe they can do what they want to them with impunity. So, you see, it really isn’t a serious thing at all, but the whining of insecure and unintelligent males who have enjoyed an enormous amount of privilege in their lives. There is no equivalent to emasculation for women. Women have never had any kind of power. The closest would be feminization/infantilization, which is more of an ensuring that power is never achieved rather than a taking away of (non-existent) power. Emasculation is actually a good thing for men – and the entire world – and really, should be called ‘humanization’ – the stripping of men’s right to threaten, control, rape, and kill women with impunity – a process that makes males more human.] For more on the lack of true equivalent to emasculation when it comes to women, see this post.
The feminization and infantilization of women all over the world is almost ubiquitously accepted by females, so effective has the brainwashing program been. Women don’t question the strange and cruel rituals they are forced to engage in, and often serve as on-the-ground enforcers for children and non-conforming, rebel-women, thus lessening the work men have to put into controlling the female population. All practices are designed, often by women themselves in a subconscious effort to make themselves more appealingly rapeable to pedophiles. That is key to remember. All feminization practices all over the world are designed to make women seem like fuckable children, the preferred human targets for men. Confident, strong, independent, adult women don’t tend to fall so easily for male nonsense and tend to distance themselves from male control. There is no appeal to men in this kind of person. Children, on the other hand, aside from their child bodies, which are incomprehensibly attractive to males (honestly, I can’t even get into the head of a generic male in order to understand their universal pedophilic lusts), children are naive, inexperienced, and easy to manipulate psychologically and intellectually. These characteristics are appealing to men, in general.
So what do women do to make themselves more appealing to rapists? I don’t have enough space here to discuss the range of rituals carried out in different countries, but I’ll offer a few up.
In China, where I have years of experience, I notice that it is customary for women to refer to themselves as ‘girls’. In university classrooms, males will refer to themselves as men, but their same-age female classmates will be ‘girls’. If I call them ‘women’, everybody gets weirded out. It has been explained to me that that is what males want. They want a female who acts like a girl. And after years of watching predictable and repetitive interactions between dating and married couples here, I understand the dance well. Females are required to be literally physically led around by males. They are not to have preferences. They are required to sulk, and pout, and cry, and sit silently alternating with throwing infantile temper tantrums when something is inevitably done wrong by the male in the relationship. They act very much like children, in other words. Women are required to give little slaps of protest to the arms of their boyfriends or husbands when said dude is messing around. They are required to let deficient males cheat off them in class and then to accept the inevitable rewarding of these same incompetent males with better jobs, more opportunities and higher pay. Chinese women are completely infantilized. And when they refuse to act like children – especially in the workplace – they are called ‘dragon ladies’.
I was also treated to a charming relating of a Chinese myth by one of my local friends. He was telling me that some people believe that daughters are actually former lovers of their fathers in a past life. He thought it was a cute and sweet story. I felt revolted and saw an open door for rationalizing incestuous pedophilia. I don’t know how common this belief actually is. But it is creepy as hell and an example of one of the many myths men around the world design in order to create justifications for the abuse of female children and adults.
We have infantilizing, pedophilic rituals in the West as well. One prime example is the tortuous and irrational practice of removing body hair from female bodies. Almost all Western women cling to this practice and angrily protest and relentlessly attack brave and strong women who refuse to submit to this idiocy. The practice is becoming worse and more barbaric with new techniques and harsher standards. More and more hair has been stripped from women’s bodies – there is practically nothing left on women these days. And the only explanation that makes sense for how this all started is that it has to do with trying to obtain a child-like body. Little girls have almost no hair on their bodies. Men like to rape and objectify little girls. But how did this horrific ritual start? How did we get from allowing girls to grow naturally into adult women to forcing women to believe their naturally maturing bodies were gross or unnatural or dirty? I can only imagine that male pedophilia is at its root. Women either got jealous (probably) or wanted to distract their husbands from raping their daughters (um, possibly), and decided that instead of standing up and saying ‘fuck off!’, they would distract the pedophiles and try to bring them back to the path of woman-rape. I can’t imagine any other reason for this practice’s origin that makes sense. All irrational female behaviour and thought patterns are directly caused by male control, rape, and destruction. Sorry dudes, women don’t irrationally try to destroy themselves for the hell of it. It is because of men. And for some reason, women think it makes more sense to go along with self-destruction than to fight.
Western marital name-changing is also an infantilizing ritual done only to women. Erasing a woman’s human identity and branding her with the mark of her husband just like a child or livestock is another way in which women are denied any kind of power. It has been said many times that there is power in a name. And it makes sense that any power that may come from that might be denied a woman. Men and women alike scoff at the idea that it is a big deal for a woman to change her name. But suggest to a man that he take a wife’s name, or even better, accidentally call a man by his wife’s name (if she keeps her surname), and you’ll find out just what a big deal it is. I remember witnessing a never-ending and irrationally blown-out-of-proportion rant by my left-wing, liberal, highly educated father one time when he answered the phone and was called his wife’s name by a telemarketer. It was like he had received a death threat, given the way he reacted to what was an innocent mistake. See, marital name change IS a big deal and it serves to infantilize women and to reinforce that they are the sexual property of their master-husband.
Another example that is present in many cultures in the world is that of beauty pageants. There is an increasing interest in entering young girls into pageants and forcing sexuality and objectification on them in very blatant ways. It is a messed up world of making little girls look and act more like adult women. We are at a point where little girls and women are clearly being told they are one and the same. Fuck objects. But, the younger, the better. It is truly horrifying.
Likely, you can think of specific examples of pedophelia support in your own life / culture. Perhaps (likely), you even do things yourself that support pedophelia through the infantilizing of yourself, your female offspring, and/or the women around you. All feminization serves to infantilize women, and remember that all infantilization of adult women is rooted in men’s desire for children. Controllable, rapeable, infantilized women are the closest thing today’s men can legally get to children. And women are deeply invested in keeping men raping them, and will go to great lengths to makes themselves seem as young as possible. Like in my other posts on enforced heterosexuality (and enforced sexuality), I truly believe that men are not specifically designed to fuck women. They get turned on by anything and everything, and if it comes to humans, little girls are often much more appealing than less naive and harder-to-control adult women. Ask yourself if you really, truly want to know exactly how large the international, underground and deep-web pedo-porn rings are. And whether your hubbies and boyfriends and fathers and sons are jerking off to pics and vids of children. Yeah, you might not want to know…
Whoever said that men weren’t creative beings? Well, they are. In a way. They’re creative in much the same way that they are capable of love. It is very different from how women love. Men love beer, or cars, or evolutionary biology, or vindictive deities, or women in pretty much the same way – without nuance. The ‘love’ is shallow, but intense, and is both self-oriented and self-serving. Men don’t love as a selfless act or in a way that helps someone (or something) other than themselves. Men love beer because it dulls existential pain, might be pleasurable on the tongue, and gives them a way of shirking rape charges in the rare case that a woman is stupid enough to speak truth about her violation in public. In the same way, when men love people, it is because the object of love serves them in some way. He isn’t selflessly giving himself to the person, he is telling us that he has use for her. “I love you” means: “Currently, I am getting some use and pleasure from you. And that may change tomorrow if you fail to please me in some way.” The object is always replaceable, and if not replaced, the man in question usually falters in some significant way. Men who lose a long-term wife-slave seldom live very long after her death. The same is not true of women as male love is not about taking care of women in the ways that matter. Women usually find their freedom after spousal death. But that is male love. It is self-serving and highly conditional upon the love-object delivering what is expected and making no demands in return. And often, in men, love lies on the knife blade’s edge with their hatred, and sometimes, they are completely indistinguishable. Love often resembles hate just as male-defined sex is practically indistinguishable from rape. And so, a man can emotionally abuse, rape and beat a woman and call it love. And an emotional apology to her afterwards coupled with the word ‘love’ will always win a woman over because she understands emotion and tears and apologies and gifts. For her that is love – the giving. For a man though, he is afraid of losing his object, and will do and say anything to avoid losing his power.
The creative drive in men is similar. Men create for several reasons – all of them self-serving. Men create to consume. They create to gain power and money. They create to gain envy and admiration. They create to satisfy various fantasies (all of which are destructive to the object being used). Underlying much of this is a fundamental truth: they create objects to hate and to direct their rage at.
And so we have Woman.
Now I’ve written in the past that we have never known what a natural woman is. I’ve discussed the interaction of nature and nurture and how they affect males and females differently (here) and how we can tell what is natural and unnatural behaviour (here). I believe that not only are men solely allowed to be natural creatures, but that females – or Woman – is a completely constructed being. She is the crowning glory of men’s creative output. She changes over time and across cultures to reflect what men believe their rights (also what they call their ‘needs’) to be. But, the common theme across time and place has always been that Woman is a fuckhole (or series of fuckholes) and a baby-factory. She is forced to be dependent on men for survival, while at the same time is threatened by these very same men. She lives in a continuous, boner-producing loop of fear of and love for her oppressor (aka Stockholm Syndrome). She is his biggest fan and greatest defender, even as she cowers from him and fears the constant threat his existence signifies to her. Woman exhibits a highly unnatural set of behaviours all designed to suit male purposes (domination, quelling feelings of inadequacy, sado-sexual pleasure, material for comedy, etc).
But all artists tend to have a current of self-loathing running through them. It fuels them by producing angst – and the creative drive. And Woman, as a male creation, serves another important purpose for him. She is the ultimate object of his hate. He has created something to use, something that is the exact opposite of what he feels he himself is, and in doing so, he creates something to loathe. He loves what he has created in the way that he is capable of love as I described above, but the angst-ridden artist can never achieve perfection – actual women can never meet his expectation of perfection – so he ends up hating his creation. He creates something to ‘love’ (use), but it is also something to hate and continually mock and try to destroy. She allows him to avoid directly destroying himself, although by destroying Woman, is actually is destroying everything, including himself.
I talk about female slurs more in depth in another post, but I’ll briefly mention them here as they are also the main archetypes that males love to hate. I’m referring to the Bitch and the Whore.
The Bitch was initially a dehumanizing reference to Woman’s forced role as a breeding dog. Men denied her entrance to almost every other possible role in society. It’s what he wanted and needed to assert his dominance, and he also hated her for it. Imagine putting a bird in a cage, denying it access to the sky, and then commenting that not only do birds never ever fly, but they don’t even want to or like to fly. They may perhaps not even be designed for flying despite the fact that they have wings. And the satisfying conclusion, “Stupid, useless, fucking birds. At least they make the cage look good!” This has been woman’s story since time began. Men forced Woman into a breeding dog role, prevented her from doing anything else with her life, and erroneously saw this as proof that she neither wanted to do nor was capable of doing anything else. All this despite a highly evolved brain and the same (or greater) capacity for skill mastery as men. “Stupid, useless, fucking bitches. At least, they make ME look good.”
The Bitch, more recently, has become a replacement term for Woman. Before this, as some women started to openly question their caged existence and the male creative drive, it used to be used most often to refer to a woman who pointed out or interfered with men’s privilege and brutality. But these days, if you pay attention to media, entertainment, daily conversations, output from gay and black culture, etc., you’ll see that in many ways, Bitch is now equal to Woman. And, strangely enough, the trannies – men in dresses – are taking over the word ‘woman’ for themselves. How did we get here…? The intensity and normalization of woman-hate in Western countries is reflected by how little attention hate speech such as this and other woman-slurs receive. I mean really, television will bleep out ‘fuck’, but not ‘bitch’. And all racial and ethnic slurs produce a cringe-factor in all people these days and are NEVER heard on television. Opposing a woman-slur gets you laughed at or an admonishment for not having your priorities straight (e.g., focusing instead on racism). Nope, woman hate is at an all-time high, and is completely brushed under the carpet. Men’s creative juices are still flowing, and Woman is becoming more and more unnatural with every iteration.
We also have the Whore. Since the beginning of time, men have creatively allowed a second role for Woman because it served an extremely important purpose for them. She is the Whore – a rejected woman; an unlucky woman; a confused, abused, misguided woman; and in essence, a woman who serves male sexual ‘needs’ in all ways. In the past, women were disallowed into the economy, and completely dependent on men for survival. One wrong move or a piece of bad luck, and she was forced into renting her body to every male in order to live (as opposed to selling her body to one man as a wife). In reality, if women were free from men and living naturally, they would never have even conceived of selling their bodies. But as per creative male design, putting Woman into a situation where she must service cock to survive allowed men an outlet for their sexual depravity as well as a very convenient object for their hate and rage. The Bitch was/is hated, but the Whore is hated more. Another love/hate object. Men tell us they are entitled to the use of whores, while at the same time castigating them and denying them humanity. They are hated and wanted and used by religious and atheist, conservative and liberal men alike. In the present day, capitalist men tell us that selling your cunt is a legitimate business, just like flipping burgers. But, unlike the burger-flipper, men hate and abuse whores. Truly, though, men see all women as whores. Some are public (prostitutes, strippers, etc.) and some are private (girlfriends, wives, etc.) The Whore is also a convenient construction used to divide women. Private whores are threatened by public whores and vice versa. Pitting these women against once another is part of the male plan of hate and control, and it works well. But underneath it all, public Whore, private Whore, and Bitch are really all one and the same… Woman.
One thing to know is that these archetypes, and the slurs themselves, will NEVER go away. They are a crucial part of the male system of violence and hate and creation and ‘love’ that was designed by men long ago. It is impossible to imagine a world where men exist and creative hate doesn’t. Men talk about the feminization/pussification of society, and this is exactly what they are getting at. They can’t exist without violence and woman-hate. They are threatened by the idea of dismantling their system by the introduction of natural female qualities of fairness, empathy, knowledge- and truth-seeking, love, etc. They fear the removal of hate and violence, the very things that give men meaning and purpose and that currently underlie every single society in existence. They fear the eradication of their greatest creation – the Whore/Bitch. They don’t have to worry though, no one is fighting them. Quite the opposite, actually.
[This post is part of the Love = Hate series.]
As a methodologist and measurement specialist, I’ve spent a fair amount of time thinking about data and human characteristics and the goals of assessment. There really are very few true dichotomies, and thus little actual binary, categorical data. You’d never guess that from looking at the way people think, speak and act. Everything is yes/no, on/off – one or the other. Black and white issues. That is how the world is seen by most. Another false dichotomy, thanks mostly to Americans and their simplistic two-party political system, is the whole liberal/conservative mess. Unfortunately, the parties are often equated to general orientation, and much of the rest of the world has sort of adopted this dichotomous way of approaching and labelling issues. I think the orientations spend so much time opposing one another that thinking has been eliminated from argument formation. It’s just reactionary polarities – highly emotional responses to opponents. This kind of false dichotomy solves nothing, but rather, creates numerous problems.
There are a few dichotomies that cannot be argued with. Pregnancy is a true dichotomy (i.e., your life is ruined vs. phew! that last rape didn’t stick). Another, which has been completely eroded by liberals and mentally ill trannie dudes, and which shockingly has even people in my line of specialization completely brainwashed, is biological sex. Except for a few anomalies (anomalies meaning, not the standard normal thing, and thus not interfering with the true dichotomy), people are either XX – female, or XY – male. Gender is not a replacement for or synonym for sex, and it means something entirely different, with a well-established definition that functioned as well as a definition should (as well an enforced sociological tool/weapon). But the days of rational thought seem to be lost in the past and the age of woman-erasing agenda has forced its way in like a penis in the act of rape. Gender is here to stay, despite feminist opposition.
I’ve never really felt like I could categorize myself, ideologically speaking. I’ve always had some views that might be considered to be ‘conservative’, although I would cringe to be called that. For example, I am staunchly pro-capital punishment, although for rapists and/or serial killers of women, only. Is that conservative? I doubt other conservatives would agree with me because my view is woman-focused. For example, I don’t give a shit if men kill other men or if gays forcibly sodomize one another. But I’m so tired of everyone feeling sorry for rapists.
And I have views that might be considered to be ‘liberal’, although these days, it is just as much of an insult as ‘conservative’ is. For example, if I could vote in the US, I would have voted Rodham-Clinton – not because I think she is a top-notch candidate, or in any way, shape or form a feminist – because girls need to see that it is possible to have a female president. It is time. It is hard to take the complaints of black men seriously, when a) they were given the vote decades before all women, and b) they achieved presidency before any woman, including supposedly privileged white women, who are still actually slaves. The message is loud and clear. When females can see that a woman can be president, then girls will aim higher in life. Future candidates will get better. Start with any candidate, and work up from there. Girls will dream realistic dreams, and as women, will throw their hats in the ring. Blacks were inspired because of Obama. When the fuck will girls and women be inspired? Their inspiration right now is a president who PUBLICLY made a declaration of war against women by making a threatening rape call-to-arms (-dicks). Rape is a common form of torture used on women owned by the enemy troops during war, so to make a statement about attacking women’s ‘pussies’ is tantamount to a war cry. That women responded by knitting stupid hats and not bringing charges of hate speech against the guilty party demonstrated to me that women are asleep at the wheel. And definitely not inspired. Complacent with where they have been put in the great hierarchy. No inspiration for women in the US, when all they can muster up while under threat is a pair of fucking knitting needles – and not for jabbing in the gonads, I might add.
But in the distant past, I was probably more aligned with liberal thinking than I am now. I had some good radical feminist ideas, but sprinkled therein, was some of the lib-fem bullshit that we hear today and that has been designed for female use by ‘nice guy’ leftie men, and swallowed by women eager to both please and to appear edgy and ‘with it’. In the past, though, liberal thinkers were not quite so out in space then as they are now. I mean seriously, people have really lost the plot. I recently got back from a very short trip to Washington DC and environs, and I suppose it is because I am not immersed in American (or Western) craziness on a day-to-day basis, but I see things just getting worse and worse every time I go back for a visit. It was my first visit post-Trumpocalypse. Friends at my old university mentioned that they had to bring counsellors in for the students post-election. I was a little surprised by that one for some very complicated reasons I couldn’t understand right away. I thought my school was conservative? I also heard liberal (ha ha) usage of the word ‘racism’ and ‘bitch’, both of which were disturbing. Misogyny is actually the biggest problem facing the US (and all countries), and people are ignoring the real issues, focusing instead on the easy stuff. I think women are very confused about what misogyny is. They are also confused about what feminism is. Women are focused on strange things, and IMO, the wrong things. As it is, the whole movement seems… fucked up. Yeah, that’s the technical word for it.
Anyhow, that visit, and some of the weird shit women are writing about each other on the net got me to thinking about liberalism and how it is destroying the world. Note, that I am not suggesting that conservatism is the way to go. Those fuckers are dangerous, but in a more predictable way, and can thus be fought easily – not that women have any intention of fighting anything that requires more than hat-knitting… I’ve seen a lot of feminists doing some disturbing conservative cock-sucking recently online. Again, the problem when you only see things dichotomously. If not A, then B. Wrong! Because there are C and D and E.
,I remember when I was in grad school for the second time about 10 years ago. I had some really interesting female friends. One of them was this really great woman from India who was doing her PhD in some kind of engineering field. And I remember her telling me something that flipped a switch in my mostly liberal mind. She said to me: you Western women think you are much freer than we are in India, but you are just as enslaved as we are. Perhaps worse. It just manifests in a different way. You can’t or won’t see it. But from outside your countries, we see it.
I didn’t say much at the time, but I did spend a lot of time thinking about that insight. Thanks to the hatred heaped upon white women in Western countries and the self-hate that arises from that, I had learned to hate myself even more than I had before because of how ‘privileged’ I was told I was. I and my white sisters were to blame for everything every other woman on the planet was experiencing. It was our job as white women to end every problem for every other person on the planet. The brainwashing that white women, especially, undergo these days is intense and expertly delivered. The effects are positively admirable, and if I were to wage some kind of war, I’d want to hire the propagandists that designed that piece of psychological warfare and have them work on my plan. My Indian friend was correct. In the West, we are crippled and slowly destroyed by men in different, but equally horrible ways. And part of that misogyny is the blame for our so-called status. (“You bitches are so fucking lucky for the way we rape and objectify you!!!” “Yes, yes, I deserve to be raped more… I am so racist for not letting men of colour rape me. I am so privileged for not letting homeless men rape me…” ad naseum) And here is the kicker. While we internalize the self-hate for our ‘privilege’, no women in any other country see us as enviable creatures, especially once they come to our countries. Most Western women don’t realize this, of course. Women in burqas aren’t dreaming of having their tits hanging out of their dresses in public. Women in Third World countries don’t crave to have the ‘freedom’ to sexually service as many men as possible without any kind of compensation or exchange. There is no true freedom in what Western men offer us. We are still whores. We are still cunts to be used. We are still the unpaid emotional and physical labour. We still provide all the volunteer and charity services because men won’t put their money into basic services. We are still the bulk of the slave labour. In the West. In the free, free West.
I’m not liberal. I’m not conservative. I employ whatever ideas and tools I have at my disposal to move towards female liberation from men. Perhaps, the word is radical.